Husband leaves 3yo son in bath for a few seconds

And how reasonable you are, letting us all know when the poll was 50/50.

I see you also think you should leave a small child in the bath alone?

And also, like @Cogsworthy accusing people of things they never did, such as "lecturing" when people are simply giving advice.

Some of us think it's risky, some of us don't.
No need to make things up such as "lecturing" and "nastily judging".

You've suggested that people who do nip out of the room while their 3 year old is in the bath (and that's nearly half the people who participated in this poll) must have 'special needs', or lack the most basic instinct to protect their children, or are immature. That's some fucking judgement.

Oh how reasonable you are 🙄

Shall we agree to disagree then?

Or is that disappointing for you because you want to keep accusing me of things I never said or "nastily judged people" on?

Up to you?

No one said you couldn't. Just pointed out the absurdity of nastily judging other parents because they appropriately assess risks. Not sure why you think nastily judging people who are actually correct means you're better than they are...

Ok
You parent how you think best.
Those of us who feel it's a bit risky (despite the stats) we can parent how we think best.

Happy?

Part of bathing young children or anyone else at risk of drowning is preparing the environment so you don't have to leave the room while they're in the water.

He should not need to leave the room for a towel of all things.

As already outlined. In the average year, 0 3yo drown in the bath. Zero. None. In fact, there's only record of one drowning in the bath in recent history - and the parent was in the room at the time but had a medical emergency.

A 3yo is more likely to be killed by bees or lightning.

Risk isn't imaginary.
Sorry if you think it is.

ODFOD

The desperation to "protect" your child from imaginary harm isn't a flex. Other people aren't bad parents because they don't "protect" their child from that imaginary harm.

I guarantee you do things other parents would consider dangerous.

Agree with others saying it is not worth the risk. If DH is downstairs, he obviously can't see or hear them. I forget the towel frequently and my dc have been wrapped in my jumper, scarf and, in one memorable moment, a tea towel because I wouldn't let them out of my eyeline when in the bath.

I haven't often seen point scoring over safety measures for young children, but to me it speaks of immaturity or maybe special needs.

I say this because my dad was autistic and he would argue the toss over whether certain safety measures for babies & children were necessary.
Thankfully he was never proved right.

I think it's mostly about basic common sense.
When we become parents, most of us have this natural instinct to protect, along with basic common sense.
Sadly, some parents don't.

Great, I am pleased that you now realise drowning can take place silently and as such babies, infants and young children should never be left unattended when in or near water.

Yeh, crazy how when people make unsubstantiated claims on the internet I don't just accept them without looking into the evidence.

I’ll never understand people who double down on things like this. Wouldn’t you say “wow okay, I didn’t realise that, but now I know that the risks of a three old drowning in the bath are lower than the risk of them being killed by bees or by lightning, good to know”. Instead, some people would rather continue to scaremonger on the internet and try to point score, as well as creating an entirely unnecessary rift in someone else’s marriage. It’s absolutely wild!

I’ll never be able to understand people who double down on things like this. Wouldn’t you say, ‘wow okay, I didn’t realise that, but now I know that children can slip in the bathtub and drown silently, good to know.’ Instead, some people would rather Google the deaths of children in order to try to point score on the internet? It’s absolutely wild!

I've been googling and apart from the very sad case above, I can't find any news of healthy 3 yos left alone for a couple of minutes drowning. Nearly all the cases involve young babies, under 2, being left unattended for prolonged periods of time.

I remember this case my own ds was a toddler at the time.

Again this is a huge misunderstanding of what happens.

A child (or adult actually) almost always panics if they inhale water, as it is instinctively terrifying to be unable to breathe, this panic interferes with the natural process of righting themselves.

Being able to lift up on dry land whilst breathing is irrelevant - drowning means the water has stopped them breathing.

Children can slide under the water silently and lose consciousness very quickly, drowning is often completely silent.

Although it's horrible it might be a good idea for you to read up about the actual process, as you're imagining you would hear something but sadly that's not the case.

If a child slipped in the bath there wouldn’t necessarily be a loud bang as the water muffles the sound. So no, you wouldn’t necessarily hear it.

Yes. Ask any paediatric nurse. They’ll be able to tell you. The fall can be silent. The drowning is so very often silent.

Yes.

Well that’s not true is it as there are plenty of people on here saying they think it’s OK. The key thing is how both you and Dh feel when reading the use cases where something tragic has happened and whether that’s worth taking the risk. For me if one of you is not OK with it, then it shouldn’t be happening but if Dh doesn’t respect that, you may have to take over bath time, although from your later update it sounds like the thread may have swayed him and not necessary, hopefully that’s the case.