Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say MIL not sleeping on new sofa when it arrives?

259 replies

Starry4321 · 29/07/2025 08:02

We have 2 bed home with a young toddler (crib her room, no spare bed) so space is tight. When MIL comes to visit (5 hours away) she normally sleeps on sofa with bedding with her dog. It’s a big comfy sofa and she has always stated she prefers that over the blow up bed option we also offer. For the first time in almost a decade we have a new sofa arriving Saturday. It’s a light colour and quite expensive. I said to DH today when MIL comes to visit I think its best we look at some sort of pop up style bed I can set up in living room for her with bedding instead of sleeping on new sofa. Particularly as dog will also be sleeping with her. He got annoyed and said he wants her to sleep on new sofa and said I am over complicating things. MIL even said oh brilliant, new sofa, can’t wait to sleep on it!

I just don’t went the new sofa being ruined basically! More than happy to make an alternative bed a comfy option for her to stay. AIBU?

OP posts:
TitaniasAss · 29/07/2025 08:16

OP I understand where you're coming from, but if space is at a premium, even another pop up option perhaps isn't a good idea, as you have to store it somewhere afterwards. I also agree with a pp that your toddler is going to be more of a problem for the sofa than your MIL. 😊 Mine threw up on my sofa the week after we got it!

I wouldn't want the dog on it though.

Bikergran · 29/07/2025 08:16

Buy a big thick washable elasticated cover for the sofa and put that on BEFORE MIL arrives, then bedding etc goes over that. Always use it for guests, or before kids' parties etc. Should keep your sofa pristine.

Original poster
Starry4321 · 29/07/2025 08:15

GRex · 29/07/2025 08:08

I'm confused. If your current sofa is big and comfy then why are you replacing it, especially with something that doesn't meet your needs that include being a spare bed? You have a toddler, so the idea that a light sofa will be FINE with the toddler but "ruined" by MIL sleeping is ridiculous. Scotchgard is essential and get extra covers plus use sheets.

I wouldn't allow a dog on the sofa though, that's fair enough.

It’s about 10 years old with some damage from wear and tear. Sagging seat cushions etc. We are redecorating the living room right now so decided to take the plunge with new one. It has lasted us well.

I have it in my head that sofas aren’t designed to be slept on and it would ruin the cushions and the shape. Plus the dog is quite smelly. Maybe I am just being over protective of the new purchase as we don’t often buy things like this!

Toddler could mark it yes, but we have taken out a policy which means the will professionally clean our sofa if it gets marks we can’t remove.

It was more the sagging seat cushions over time I was worried about as that’s not as easily fixed as a mark.

OP posts:
Eenameenadeeka · 29/07/2025 08:14

Id say Mil can sleep on it but not the dog.

CurlewKate · 29/07/2025 08:14

DoneitagainhaventI · 29/07/2025 08:13

My son only has a one bedroom flat so I sleep on the sofa when I go there. Actually " don't sleep" on the sofa would be the accurate description. The biggest problem being the bedding falling off and onto the floor multiple times in the night.

So personally if I was your MiL I would be delighted with the offer of a put- me- up bed.

And I think she should respect your wishes anout your new sofa, which I find perfectly understandable and reasonable.

Could you explain why it is understandable and reasonable?

DoneitagainhaventI · 29/07/2025 08:13

My son only has a one bedroom flat so I sleep on the sofa when I go there. Actually " don't sleep" on the sofa would be the accurate description. The biggest problem being the bedding falling off and onto the floor multiple times in the night.

So personally if I was your MiL I would be delighted with the offer of a put- me- up bed.

And I think she should respect your wishes anout your new sofa, which I find perfectly understandable and reasonable.

Twothurty · 29/07/2025 08:12

I think you need to give your head a wobble on this one

A sticky fingered 2 year old is going to be far more of a problem than gran sleeping on it.

What sort of dog does she have ( I’m not sure if this matters but assume some dogs shed/slobber/scratch more than others?)

I do understand the desire to keep it pristine and just for its main function but I think that’s a new things anxiety rather than an actual issue

Enjoy your new sofa!

GRex · 29/07/2025 08:08

I'm confused. If your current sofa is big and comfy then why are you replacing it, especially with something that doesn't meet your needs that include being a spare bed? You have a toddler, so the idea that a light sofa will be FINE with the toddler but "ruined" by MIL sleeping is ridiculous. Scotchgard is essential and get extra covers plus use sheets.

I wouldn't allow a dog on the sofa though, that's fair enough.

BlueMum16 · 29/07/2025 08:05

Personally I see no-issue with her but I'd draw the line at the dog.

How do you think she'll ruin it?

Swipe left for the next trending thread