AIBU to tire of moral superiority around meals?

Laughing at how inaccessible for me people's ideas of super quick meals are! Just some chicken with roast potatoes and steamed broccoli.
I have none of that food in the house (except frozen broccoli), have 5 minutes to prep/ cook and they wouldn't eat the same thing anyway so it would go in the bin.

Nursery and childminders count a sandwich with fruit ir veg as healthy. Nitrites and preservatives. So I'm going to keep doing my best and leave y'all to do your best

Egg and homemade chips, 20 minutes.

That's all I'm going to say on the matter.

I'm afraid I do judge if people who do this a lot also have overweight children.

Perfectly normal IMO! My DS13 is ADHD/ASD and can be quite limited in his diet so we often batch make meatballs with PASSATA, spinach (frozen chopped cubes) and bit of red wine, 4 hours in the slow cooker and that does a few meals for him with pasta. Slow cooker is a godsend! I have inflammatory issues with joints and TS dons sp often just but pre chopped veg that’s frozen, quicker and easier for me to do meals …. If I remember to take out meat lol!
we often have beans on toast, chip shop once a month or so, nuggets/fish etc and oven chips for DS. I don’t care about super mum types!

What about Thai? When I get takeaway it's usually Thai. They have some amazing curries and I get them from a takeaway that is also a restaurant. It's just as fresh as I would make myself.

But boy do we enjoy a takeaway!

I’m aware that many (most?) people like take-aways, but I find this really puzzling. What do you actually get and what is so enjoyable about?

Pizza? The ones I’ve had were drenched in tomato sauce and cheese and really not very nice. I prefer the fresh ones from Lidl, accompanied by a ‘massive’ salad.

Chinese? Yes, we have that occasionally….. because I find cooking several Chinese dishes too much of a faff - and I’m not very good at it.

Indian? Love Indian food and I’m quite good at making it, but otherwise we’d go to one of 3 local restaurants rather than getting take-out. Much more enjoyable.

What else is there that’s actually really tasty? Most of the time I simply prefer my own food. I cook a lot of Middle Eastern food and take inspiration from TV chefs and YouTubers and buy a cookbook every now and again. I make pan-fried or baked chicken or fish, meatballs, steaks, plus lots of roast vegetables and salads.

I was brought up on home cooked meals and I'm proud to say that my DS never ever ate a jar of baby food or other stuff promoted for babies. It was all home cooked food.
However, now he's a teen, he loves a takeaway. I restrict it to once a week treat.
I'm teaching DS to cook from scratch.
But boy do we enjoy a takeaway!

Capitalism stops people from cooking?
how so?

If there isn't much time, something like a tray bake is good. Roasted veges and some protein with it (I like salmon or chicken or something). A slow cooker saves a lot of time and means there is something good at the end of the day. Good, home made food doesn't have to take a lot of time.

I believe that good nutrition is a foundation of good health. No, my diet isn't perfect, I don't think there's any harm in the odd frozen dinner. Sometimes you do what you have to do when you just don't have the energy or time. I do make the effort though.

What tells me it's worthwhile is how much better I feel when I eat well. The fresher the food the better. I have been eating a lot from my vege garden over summer (only grow easy to grow stuff, low effort) and feel even better again.

This is one area I do put effort into. Meal prepping and planning ahead makes a big difference and it's not really time consuming.

Not judging. Just sharing my experience.

💯

this has opened my eyes, I need to get better at planning I can cook so I should more often. Thank you for sharing these ideas.

You’re exactly right. It’s nobody’s business. Capitalism has prevented us being able to do as much as we’d like in terms of cooking. If I hope my life is never SAD enough to judge what another woman is feeding her kids and worse voice my thoughts or have a snooty attitude about it.

i love a kfc and mcdonald’s 🫢

I’m sorry but a fish finger wrap? All kinds of wrong surely the only way to eat fish fingers is with chips and beans or in a sandwich!

I cook a mixture.

There are nights when I shove beige in the oven. It's slower than cooking pasta and even than shoving some veg and other ingredients into a blender to make a sauce, but sometimes it's brain capacity and standing time that wins.

Alas the more effort, and the more nutrients I put into a meal, the more likely it is that I'll offend DS who'll come in, look and dismiss my efforts as "hodge podge" and pick grumpily at the least suspicious lumps. Unfortunately it's common with autism to favour the consistency and predictability of processed food over naturally variable foods. BLW and years of producing home-made, multi-allergen free has not prevented him getting picky with age and sometimes he just needs loading with empty calories to not become underweight rather than negotiating over nutrients at every meal. The worst thing I can do is apply too much pressure, stress him and he'll strop off without eating until the next meal.

The range of "good enough" is pretty broad, and not all processed foods are equal in nutritional value (or lack of). A jar of Dolmio isn't vastly inferior to a home made tomato sauce and isn't the same league as a pot noodle.

Frustratingly a lot of the less processed, healthy, quick fixes such as omlettes or beans on toast are not foods that he'll tolerate eating.

I wish he would devour my home-made veg packed curries etc, but that just isn't our reality.

I am judgemental of people (my extended family behind their backs - i know i am a bit of a cow!). But every meal is pretty much ultraprocessed. It starts at breakfast with crappy cereal. Sandwiches and crisps for lunch. Convenience food for dinner - not even that quick to make, eg oven chips, sausages and beans.

It does not take that long to make simple food alternatives. And it doesn't have to be homemade from scratch all the time. What about half?

I know they have the time because they are on their devices for hours in the evening.

It is also my mum (in her 70s). I visited her and cooked her a stew for dinner, soup for lunch, but she said thanks but no thanks. Frozen supermarket lasgne and cream crackers instead. It makes me sad because she has heart issues, and eating proper would help. Buy she is too set in her ways. I have to respect that. So, I don't nag. Just moan behind her back to vent!

Exactly this.

doesnt take time put a chicken breast in egg yolk then breadcrumbs if you want to bung some cut potatoes in the oven with oil and salt (maybe some paprika) is all home made and delicious. Serve with salad, or peas or whatever takes your fancy

or bumg some pesto, cashews, olive oil and Parmesan in a blender and you’ve got home made pesto (add garlic if you like it)

or poached salmon (salt and lemon juice in a touch of water, bring to boil and switch off and leave for 10 mins) and a salad (leaves, tomatoes, onions//spring onions, olive sweetcorn, peppers) - take less than 10
mins - serve with crusty bread

we do make more elaborate things, but I do not buy this attitude of cooking take ages

honestly, we don’t eat many (any) take aways as it is over salted, expensive and greasy
and we just don’t enjoy it.

My ex-MIL is Spanish- lovely lady. Worked full time but never ever compromised on mealtimes as believed with all her heart, what your loved ones actually ingest in terms of nutrients and goodness is incredibly important - especially children who are growing.
Her idea of fast food eg dinner on the table in ten minutes would have been a pan fried protein -fish /chicken/pork/ usually with some olive oil and sea salt- maybe lemon and paprika. Alternatively a two egg omelette with tuna.
This would be served with a tomato and onion salad, garlic mayonnaises and good bread. Afterwards there would be a slice of cheese, two pieces of fruit and a glass of milk.
Day in day out while she was working and all on the table in the time it takes to fry a fillet and chop a tomato.

The idea that nutrition would be sacrificed at the altar of ‘chilling out’ or not being arsed was totally alien to her - leading to clashes when my lazy ex-SIL had a fussy son who became partial to pizza - on a weeknight no less! IIRC he wouldn’t drink milk either which kept the poor woman awake at night.

God I miss her (and her omelettes)

I struggle so much with discussions around DC and food. DD11 has ARFID and has been difficult to feed since she was tiny. I already felt so much guilt but then I'd come on here (or other places!) and see people crying, "omg you fed your child a CHIP, what a terrible mother you are!" which made me feel even worse!

DS7 has a much better diet but can still be picky if he's unsure or if something isn't "right". I try so hard but sometimes you've got to give them something they'll eat because otherwise you've got miserable, hungry kids. I'm not saying mine have McDonalds every week, and we do our best to get the healthiest meals we can into them, but our general household diet would have half of MN clutching their pearls.

Lots of frozen things are healthy eg frozen fruit and veg may have more vitamins. Double cooking and freezing half is fine. Ditto tomato or cheese sauce or bolognese sauce. Frozen fish is fine. Ready meals less so.

we have an obesity crisis which is increasing affecting children so potentially we need to be more concerned about what kids are eating, not less.

I don't resort to freezer food. If I need a 'quick' meal, then it's pasta and throw some veg in. Or there are plenty of other options that PP are mentioning. Takes under 15 minutes - less than your average beige freezer delight.
Batch cooking and the slow cooker is my friend too.

I want to preface this by saying I am an incredibly lazy person and hate cooking so am absolutely not judging anybody who doesn’t want to spend time in the kitchen and also understand that for working women, having to cook a family dinner at the end of the day is hard. But I do think that feeding your kids non processed food is the bare minimum. There are quick, lazy options - cheese on a jacket potato, cheese on toast, scrambled eggs etc etc. Frozen food/ready meals/fast food etc are full of harmful chemicals and eating these things regularly have long term effects, some of which we don’t even understand yet. You have an informed choice of what you put in your body, your kids don’t and I do think it’s shameful when parents can’t even be bothered to feed their children a normal meal especially when the time it takes to put a potato in the microwave is the same as putting fish fingers in the oven (for example)

You'd have to be pretty well off to eat KFC regularly, it's extortionate!

Exactly. It's sad if it's seen to be morally superior feeding your kids what you should be! The bar is getting too low