Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wish I’d said something to this charity shop worker?

112 replies

lostalil · 28/07/2025 16:32

I was in a charity shop today with stepson aged 5. We spent about 10 minutes looking in the children’s section at books then wandered round to the clothing. He wasn’t being a nuisance at all, I’m genuinely the first to pull him up on any misbehaviour or cheekiness.

He’d sat on a dinner style chair, not one for sale, and I looked down for about ten seconds at a clothes rail but he was still in my line of sight. The till was behind me and I glanced back to see the shop assistant giving him daggers, a real dirty look. Glanced back and DSS is just sat on the chair. I walked over to the lady working and the conversation went like this:

Me: Is everything alright?
Her: What’s the matter?
Me: I’m asking if you are alright?

She’s just glaring at me, giving me daggers.

I ended up just walking out, I’ve encountered her before whilst shopping alone and she’d been very abrupt with me at the till to the point I come home and complained to DP. I was expecting her to tell me what he’d done.

I hadn’t let him run riot, he was about a metre in front of me but I’d taken my eyes off him to glance down for no more than 10 seconds.

I heard another assistant turning away a donation, saying they’ve just got no one buying at the moment and they’re overrun with stock. I don’t really feel like returning either to be honest.

Was I unreasonable or was she?

OP posts:
lostalil · 28/07/2025 16:39

Scabber · 28/07/2025 16:38

I often get asked why I'm frowning at someone. I'm usually not, if I don't have my glasses on I can't see very far and apparently look angry when I'm just staring into space

I get it, I can have a bit of a resting bitch face. But she was staring at him angrily.

OP posts:
TheCurious0range · 28/07/2025 16:38

So she didn't say or do anything, you perceived that she looked towards your step child with a look you didn't like and you felt it was necessary to confront her? I don't think she's the problem.

ComtesseDeSpair · 28/07/2025 16:38

What would you have said? She hasn’t done anything, she didn’t complain about your DS’s behaviour, she asked you what the matter was in response to your vague question. You just perceived that she had a particular expression on her face. Doing anything but what did, leaving and getting on with good day, would have made you look daft and as though you were spoiling for an argument.

mondaytosunday · 28/07/2025 16:38

Maybe she just doesn’t like kids or has had a bad time with them in the shop so was anticipating?
My DD loves charity shops but would agree with you that many of the people that work in them seem particularly miserable and not at all helpful. And I know many are volunteers but that doesn’t excuse it. And the reason they aren’t shifting stuff is they price things too high.

MarxistMags · 28/07/2025 16:38

She was.
Daring to sit on a chair ? How awful. I thought that was what they were for.
Just don't go back. There are plenty charity shops to give your money to. Or maybe it's just our town.

Scabber · 28/07/2025 16:38

I often get asked why I'm frowning at someone. I'm usually not, if I don't have my glasses on I can't see very far and apparently look angry when I'm just staring into space

lostalil · 28/07/2025 16:37

I love the shop🤣I’m in there all the time because it’s a 5 minute walk away. I’ve only seen her in there twice, the other staff are lovely.

OP posts:
WhatMe123 · 28/07/2025 16:35

Maybe you should have just been more direct and asked her why she was looking at you like that

RepoTheGeriatricOpera · 28/07/2025 16:35

Tbh I always look like I'm scowling at people, even when I'm simply indifferent.

Just don't go back there, you clearly don't like her, or the shop given the additional, pointless, information you gave about refusing a donation.

MissSophiaGrace · 28/07/2025 16:35

You should've simply said more at the time.

It's all easily resolved - just don't go back there again.

Jackfruit82 · 28/07/2025 16:34

I don’t really feel like returning either to be honest

for the best

Jackfruit82 · 28/07/2025 16:34

Ah…. So there’s history between the two of you!

Swipe left for the next trending thread