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AIBU?

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Original poster

DH overreacting over

306 replies

NoWinnersOnlyLosers · 28/07/2025 00:18

i will try to resume the situation:

I am on holiday at the moment visiting family (parents, siblings…)

I left my children yesterday with my parents so that I could catch up with friends over the weekend. Bear in mind I can only see them once a year and I am the default parent for my children and I don’t get a break, only ever when they are at school (if that counts).

On returning, my DD5 informed me while crying that her grandad told her off for dropping the remote and waking up grandma who was sleeping on the sofa in the living room. She also told me that she received a head slap for it but she cried for that.

I spoke to him and he admitted that it was a flick but was remorseful of what he did. I told him I expect this to never happen again as I have never laid a finger on them.

Now, my Dd informed her dad over a video call and she explained what happened. This didn’t sit well with him (which I understand) but he decided unilaterally to cut short our holiday by 2 weeks and book a flight for us.

He refused to talk to my parents and said he expects us to get on the plane well before our initial timeframe.

I asked my eldest child to explain what happened and if it was witnessed and the situation was explained and nothing more was added.

While I don’t accept the use of violence of any kind on children, my dad has never laid a hand on us and I feel it has developed in a molehill out of a grain of sand.

Now my eldest is crying that my husband has ruined the time with their grandparents.

My youngest is crying because she hasn’t been to the beach yet.

My mum is crying because she only gets to see us in summer.

I am equally devastated and angry as the time I have to decompress is gone and I have yet to organise plenty of things here.

My dad doesn’t know this yet as he was sleeping when all this was unfolding.

And my husband wants to impose and is a square man. He is difficult to convince otherwise and has spent money we don’t have to prove a point and damage my relationship with my parents with me being stuck in the middle.
He does not care about my family the same as he does not care about his side of the family.

WWYD?

OP posts:
awkwardasfuck · 28/07/2025 00:32

He hit her. That's enough. Get away.

Fairywingsandroses · 28/07/2025 00:30

Whilst not condoning what your father did, I agree with you that your husband has over reacted. Personally I would stay for the rest of the holiday. Your husband sounds very controlling.

TheSlantedOwl · 28/07/2025 00:29

Your H is being controlling but - wow, I would feel the same as him.

Your father hit your small child. It’s not a ‘grain of sand.’ It’s shocking you’re minimising it like that.

Original poster
NoWinnersOnlyLosers · 28/07/2025 00:28

SeagullFreeZone · 28/07/2025 00:25

So your father slapped your 5 year old across the face. Your husband is right.

A head slap is a slap to the back of the head, not the face. Not that it matters though

OP posts:
Dheops · 28/07/2025 00:26

You are the parent in charge of the children at the moment. It is your call, not his, and he is being extremely disrespectful to you.

Do you have IRL friends you could ring for counsel?

SeagullFreeZone · 28/07/2025 00:25

So your father slapped your 5 year old across the face. Your husband is right.