To think that approaching people whilst wearing this is unacceptable?

You’ve made the all too common assumption that people who aren’t you care even a tenth as much about your child’s feelings as you do.

In Ireland and Scotland all swear words are used as punctuation not in anger usually

I dont know the term dweller but it sounds like it might be something thats more concerning than t shirt slogans. Is it something that has strategies to overcome?

They are just words, though perhaps as English is my second language they lack the emotional impact.

Though I think if 'fuck' is ok to wear publicly then 'cunt' is too. They are both 'just' words.

However I find this a contradiction as some 'just words' are very frowned upon, like those insults related to a person's race. Such as the N or P word.

Either they are all 'just' words. Or we accept as a society that some words are not acceptable to be used publicly, because they cause great upset to others around us.

Just let it go and stop worrying over it. The teenage girl isn't your daughter or someone you have to deal with daily. The t shirt put you in an awkward position with your child but you can't control the actions of strangers so it's something you just have to navigate.

How did you respond to her?

It wouldn’t bother me. Children can hear and read swear words without using those words themselves.

I'm 57 and wear socks with the word fuck all over them, "fucking dare you" and "don't fuck it up". However they are not on show but I wear them to work to empower me 😀

Where do you live that the police have time to ask teenagers to change their clothes?

My dd knew all the swear words by 6 and learnt them from me. But crucially she knows when to use them (i.e. not at school, in polite society, with granny) and when it's appropriate (when we are complaining about our colleagues at home - she likes to join in with talking about what a fucking mansplainer one of mine is, and it's also fine to swear with grandad)

T shirt wouldn't bother me at all. In fact I have one with pingu on it which says "noot noot mother fucker" on it. The vape would bother me.

Age 54, adds to basket 🛒

😂

It's good though, to be with your child when they first encounter questionable things. It's a "teachable moment" in a way, because you get a chance to help your child interpret and make sense of that dark little corner of the world. Of course, this is far from the last time she'll run into that sort of thing.

If she brings it up:

"Well sometimes people think naughty things are funny. But I don't think that was funny. Do you? She was fun to talk to though, wasn't she?"

Kids laugh at poop jokes and all kinds of stuff like that, so she'll probably understand that. After all, would you really want your kid to be a lot more naive and clueless than her peers?

Okay, then just move on.

Oh and my family weren’t ‘sweaty’ but when FCUK was the trend from French connection, I loved having that T-shirt as a teenager!

and no, it wasn’t hostile, it wasn’t aggressive, I didn’t sneak to the park to drink alcohol, I didn’t bunk school… but I guess my parents thought if that’s how I could express my adolescent ‘rebellion’ it was a pretty safe way to do so.

I would advise reading the teenage brain by Dr Blakemore in a couple of years OP, otherwise I fear a rough road ahead…

Genuinely thought the conclusion of this story was going to be how delightful it was to see a teenager go out of her way and make an effort to chat and engage with a 7 year old!

What a lovely thing for her to do. Her parents should be proud <3

(and buy her more T-shirts if she wants them!)

But outside of clearly defined (and variably enforced) laws, you can’t control other people, and it’s an exercise in futility and frustration to try. All you can do is live your own life according to your standards, and attempt to understand why other people live and express themselves the way they do. And I think it’s a useful thing to give your children the analytical and critical thinking tools to do the same.

I agree with you OP - I don’t like it when people swear in public spaces, especially spaces where children are in.
It’s unnecessary.

It’s really odd to me that so many on here find it so difficult or unwarranted to draw a line in the sand.

No one is claiming anyone will fall over and die if they see or hear the word ‘fuck’ but it’s the gradual erosion of civil standards that leaves communities slightly worse off.

If ‘Fuck off’ is ok - what about a tshirt that says ‘fuck off cunt - I mean that ironically’ super imposed over a picture of a cuddly cat - to make clear it’s ironic.

You maintain standards to stop the slow descent into ‘the state of nature’. They might seem silly or pointless but they are a fence and to paraphrase Chesterton you don’t remove the fence till you know what it is holding back.

I think it’s important to teach kids critical thinking skills, including an awareness of nuance and context, and 7 is old enough to start in a simple way. This t shirt is a good example. It seems highly unlikely - although I suppose theoretically possible - that “fuck off” is intended to be interpreted at face value (ie aggressively). Far more likely that the juxtaposition of ostensibly aggressive words with a cutesy pink cat image is meant either humorously, or “politically” ie to subvert expectations and challenge assumptions.

Clearly there are times it’s inappropriate to say fuck or wear clothing with it on which kids need to be made aware of, but just telling your kids it’s a “bad” word (and implying people who use it are bad) is doing them a disservice imo.

If that’s what you consider to be really hostile then I’d gently suggest that your margins need a slight readjustment.

I'm hoping it was more like home clothes/ pyjamas. As it's true it wouldn't go down well at work, college etc. if someone complained the police community support would probably ask her to change and not wear it out.

People do wear clothes with swearwords on sometimes. It's not the end of the world really. Though I get it's not suitable if you're around kids.

It would be worse if she was wearing something saying she supports terrorism or a picture of something violent.

I swear but I think it’s a nasty habit to do in front of kids or people you don’t know. I find it pathetic really. Adults that eff and jeff in public are a bit scummy.
I’ll happily watch tv with some swearing in but shows where they seem to be trying to fit in as many fucks in as possible are really annoying.
i watch a lot of live comedy and am happy to watch quite risky stuff but I find some comedians that seem to be swearing just to appear edgy are a bit sad. Dara OBrien and Micheal MacKintyre are two that spring to mind. It doesn’t suit them.

😄
👃🧂

It's just a word. And it wasn't directed at you or your child.
The whole concept of 'swear words' is utterly ridiculous.

Jesus, the OP will get the vapors reading all that 😅

It sounds to me like it's meant to be ironic humor. It's a pic of a cute cat juxtaposed with what people regard as a rude phrase. I can see a teenager funding that funny. It's not like she was doing it to be mean to you or your son.
It actually isn't usually a hostile word anymore, it's only the off part that makes it so. For example, people routinely say things like;
"It's hot as fuck out today."
"Oh fuck. I forgot my keys."
"Hey, haven't seen you in ages. How the fuck are ya?"
"I can't fucking believe it!"
Those sort of things are said in a good natured way, not hostile at all.