Double barrelled names future generations?

My children both have 3 first names and are hyphenated. It doesn’t appear to cause them any difficulties. How do you think it would be a pain?

It feels like kicking the can down to the next generation because no one could have a sensible conversation about it now.

I think too many people do it to make a point about how modern they are at the risk of making life a real pain for their children.

I have the same (not double barrelled) surname as my children, but one of my dc has two middle names. Neither middle name sounded right on its own and one is a family name so we wanted to use it, so we went with both. Think John Peter Matthew Jones. It’s awkward. It doesn’t fit on stuff.

In retrospect, we probably shouldn’t have saddled him with such a silly long name just because we couldn’t decide. But it would be even more ridiculous if it meant his child would have to be John Peter Matthew Jones-Smith Jr. unless he dropped a name that meant something to him.

Of course deciding to go with one name is an option- as is creating a new name with a partner. I honestly don’t understand why people think it’s complicated. It really, really isn’t.

People always say they can just start dropping names, but that is a possibility now and exactly what people are trying to avoid by double barreling. Once the name “smith-jones” is created, it is no longer two separate names. It is one name, smith-jones. To drop part of it would be no different than taking the last name Johnson and deciding to just make it John. It’s a choice someone can make, but it’s fundamentally changing the name.

I personally don't see the point in middle names, so it would make sense for the middle name to be a parents surname and then to have the other parents name as the surname. Hyphenated names seem so overly complicated, and annoying

That is ridiculous 😒

I have the solution to this!
When people get married -
Women keeps her name.
Man keeps his name.
Kids double barrel.
If parents divorce, remarry and have more kids, parents still keep their own name, kids double barrel. That way kids will always share one name with both parents and any siblings, including half siblings.

If kids grow up and get married, they just keep their own double barrelled name. If they have kids, each parent chooses one name to hand down to the kid so the kid then has a new double barrel name, still sharing a name with each parent.
And so on for the next generation.

You're welcome!

Why are people implying 'spanish-language surname conventions are relevant? They are very culturally specific traditions that everyone learns when young, somewhat rigid and also often means the first name if 2 parts is hyphenated or there is no middle name. It's not AngloSaxon tradition to be so rigid.

I also think about this more than I should 😆

My kid is double-barrelled. I kept my name on marriage, the idea of taking my husband’s name repels me to my core and it would have been a cold day in hell my child didn’t share my name.

I assume upon marriage, if a marriage happens, he’ll work something out with his spouse-to-be. I don’t mind if he drops one or both. I don’t mind if he changes his first name! A name is a gift but you aren’t obligated to keep gifts.

My children have a hyphenated name. At every transition point in their lives we have given them the opportunity to drop one of the names and we have always said the it’s a completely free choice and we won’t be remotely upset-which is true. They are adults now and are still happy with the hyphen.

Incidentally-we don’t use double-barrelled. It was a term invented by Punch as a piece of unkind mockery, and were waging a one family campaign against its use!!

they are going to end up upsetting the one parent whose name they choose to drop. Parents are just pushing the problem onto their child in my opinion.

IME parents who have not followed the default / social norm are also happy to acknowledge that their Dc's name is theirs to do with what they will, and will not wish to swap the expectation of 'tradition' (man's name) with any other pressure or expectation.

My Dc can do what they like and I won't be t all upset.

Have you heard of Spain or Chile?

If my child gets married I'd love for them and their new partner to choose an entirely new surname for their new family

My parents double barrelled their names when they married, 40+ years ago
When I got married it made no sense for me to just choose one of the names, as they were both absolutely my name.
So I just swapped them both for my dh's surname, and life is much simpler when booking restaurants, GP appointments and hotel stays. I imagine my mother is turning in her grave though.

Had to change my name as potentially outing. My gran, a woman born in the early 1900s had 4 surnames added to her name . So think something like ‘Lou-Belle Smith -Jones Thomas Morgan’ She was Mrs Morgan, as my Grandfather was Joe Morgan.

But my god , the officially paperwork that came in her name.

There’s a reason neither my mum, nor her brothers had middle names.

My Scandinavian family take mums surname, so Dad is the odd one out.

No need to take husband/ fathers name, but keep it simple.

I always wonder this too OP!

I think it’s a bit unfair to expect the double-barrelled offspring to pick their favourite name to keep when they come to get married - they are going to end up upsetting the one parent whose name they choose to drop. Parents are just pushing the problem onto their child in my opinion.

For those saying the OP’s question has been asked before, so what? I haven’t seen it and presumable neither has the OP. Are things not allowed to be asked again on MN? Just scroll on by if you aren’t interested.

I know someone one with the surname along the lines of Smith-Jones Wilson-Cooper.

Except the actual names are longer than those!
Their first name is hyphenated too!

You're right! Nobody in the last 40 years has thought of this!

Less so married couples I think but parents giving their children two surnames . I am married but didn't change my name and our kids have my husband's and my surnames

I don’t know anyone who had double barrelled their names. My stepsons recently married and they didn’t, nor did my three niece/nephews who all gut married within the last four years. So where is this trend?

God imagine picking your own surname at 18. I was such a pretentious twerp I'd probably have a terribly embarrassing surname now! Bronte-Caballero or something

The whole surname thing needs shaking up.

Everyone just passes down names without thought. What is the point of being called Cooper if you don’t make barrels , or Russel if your hair is black not red?

I propose that at 18 or 21 everyone adopts a name that makes sense. Related to character, appearance, job, talent or hobby .

It would be so much easier to identify people in social situations.

And no, this is not a a clever argument in favour of children automatically taking their father’s name.

<sigh>

They choose which, if any, of the names they want to use.