Who is being unreasonable re weekend cleaning & DC in bed?

I would lose my mind if I was having a lie on and someone decided to hoover. YABT. Hoover later, the world won't end.

I’d vacuum at a complete separate time. You can vacuum on a different day to the rest of the cleaning.

It’s the holidays so they can have a lie in every day of the week most likely, why for one day would it hurt for OP to hoover at 9:30, remembering that Op isn’t on holiday everyday of the school holidays and is working full time so has limited time to do the chores.

My teenage kids sleep in given half the chance and they have been raised with good boundaries - I think all teenagers do this. I think you're unfair to hoover at 9am on the weekend. I would say that 11 is fine although even better, get DH to do it once they are up.

I lure mine down with a cooked breakfast or pancakes - it's a nice way to connect. Can you (or your H) do that?

FFS people. The teens can lie in every day of the week as it's the holidays. Hoover away OP - 9.30 isn't early and they can go back to sleep if they really need to.

No wonder so many young people are entitled these days the way they're treated like royalty by their adoring mums.

I just crack on but I've had my teens trained to sleep despite my housework 'noise' since they were babies 🤣.

You do not sound like a good stepmother.

Hoovering from 9 is fine.
but better yet, the teens do it on Saturday or Sunday once they’ve woken, so they don’t have to be woken by the noise.

I don't think you're unreasonable. I've got teens and get on with normal life when they're in bed, including hoovering upstairs. It doesn't wake mine up so there are never any issues but I wouldn't be waiting around until lunch time even if it was, if they were that bothered I'd tell them they can do the hoovering when they get up. Or in your situation perhaps DH should do it as he is the one raising it as an issue.

Isn't that fairly normal, staying up late in holidays? I do that. And I definitely did as a teen. My mum would call up about breakfast at ten.

This! At least 10.

Mine don’t. 🤷‍♀️

Hoovering at 7am. No.

Hoovering at 10am. Yes.

Why did you choose to marry a man who is not capable of having boundaries with his children? He sounds like a wet wipe, not a parent.

When my DD was a toddler she woke at 5.30am most days and I needed to get up with her.
9.00am felt pretty much like the middle of the day to me, and it wouldn’t have occurred to me not to vacuum from then onwards.
When my kids were teens they could sleep through anything.
Unless your DH gets up at the same time as you and is also doing his share I think he has a cheek to complain about your chosen schedule.

I would call a family meeting in this situation. Do it in a non-confrontational way, saying that you would like to be able to get the cleaning done and dusted (see what I did there?) before enjoying the rest of the day, but feel a bit worried you might be annoying the teenagers by hoovering. See what they say. If it is an issue, get the rest of the family to suggest a solution (which does not include you doing it when you come back from a trip out with the toddler). People may surprise you!

I am going to say YABU simply because we’ve a 2yr old and while I like yourself don’t get a lie in on the weekends the older son stays most weekends and hoovering is left until 10.30 or later. I don’t think it’s fair to deprive everyone else of a lie in. Also it has to be done before the youngest has their nap or I’d probably leave it later. A little bit of consideration for others goes a long way, we all cohabit together quite well as a result. I find it interesting you also believe they should do household chores when they’re only there weekends you said your DH does everything for them which would imply you don’t do stuff for them? Have you considered they may see it as doing stuff for you given you live there all the time and they’re not even part time

My teenagers only rouse prematurely to the shout of "FOOOOOOD!!!"

Vacuuming around the house would be a non-issue.

After a reasonable level of sleep-in, like 9am is fine to vacuum elsewhere in the house.

I have three teens (and a younger child) and I try and be as quiet as I can while they're sleeping, I just don't see the need to disturb them when I don't need to. I do get them involved in the housework though and they are expected to help, I can see why you are a bit resentful if they never do anything to help.

This, either they don't care that you hoover when they are laying in our they can do it Sunday afternoon

DH can hoover again. Remove bed clothes, help deep clean, Thursday and Friday evening.
He has to compromise.
The work has to be done.

Agree

Hoovering when people are asleep and there’s a billion other options is just mean.
you say it’s ten minutes, there are a 1000 options every week of a ten minutes slot, choose one of the other 999. No idea why your husband doesn’t do it either, at any other time slot, which you’ve avoided answering.

Is your house huge OP? I'm just thinking actually how much upstairs hoovering is there? Surely it's only a few minutes? Id expect teens do their own bedrooms anyway so surely it won't be more than about 20 mins max that you'd need to do? Id tell DH to do it then too if he's not happy with the time you do it, he can do it at a later time, all sorted. Don't think this is a big issue that you and him both seem to be making into one.

Do they sleep over on Friday nights? If not the you could do the cleaning on a Saturday