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AIBU?

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Original poster

13 year old watching newborn

361 replies

Newmum99653 · 27/07/2025 12:29

Am I being unreasonable?

I am not comfortable with our 13 year old DSD watching our newborn whilst we do jobs around the house. Personally my priority is the safety of the newborn and anything can happen quickly (choking, falling, suffocating) if not being watched properly. E.g. I came down and DSD was on phone whilst “watching” newborn whilst I was upstairs and DP was in the kitchen.

My DP on the other hand doesn’t see the problem in this at all.

My view is DSD can hold feed cuddle newborn as much as she wants but whilst we are supervising.
Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Talipesmum · 27/07/2025 12:34

You’d have a point for a more mobile slightly older child, but a newborn is safe where you put them, assuming they’re in a cot / Moses basket etc. They can’t fall off it, and there shouldn’t be anything they can choke on there?

Jellycatspyjamas · 27/07/2025 12:33

How newborn are we talking, newborns are pretty immobile and aren’t eating so risks are pretty minimal given you’re in the same house. I’d think a 13 year old could be with the baby and know to shout if anything happened. What’s your alternative if things need to be done around the house?

Hankunamatata · 27/07/2025 12:33

Totally fine for dsd to be on the phone whilst baby is next to her as long as baby is in baby seat or basket

Coffeeishot · 27/07/2025 12:33

What could your newborn tiny baby choke on ? Just have the baby in a pram or crib and im sure a 13 year old can spot any danger. Your partner was in the kitchen,you need to take a breath.

PollyBell · 27/07/2025 12:33

I did not spend all my time sat starting at my baby or toddler 24/7 so why would i expect a 13yo to do so? Your dh doesn't see a problem for a very good reason

rainbowunicorn · 27/07/2025 12:33

Do you literally have your eyes on the baby every minute when you are with them? The risks of any of those happening to a newborn are very small. Not sure how a newborn would fall. Do you mean dropped?

Original poster
Newmum99653 · 27/07/2025 12:33

Baby is 14 days old.

OP posts:
Moonnstars · 27/07/2025 12:32

Not sure what you mean by 'watching'. Surely if baby is asleep or content on a playmat or bouncy chair then I don't see what the problem is

CommissarySushi · 27/07/2025 12:32

How much watching does a newborn need? They're not going to go anywhere.

Arghhhhhparty · 27/07/2025 12:32

You are being OTT, no one needs to be watching newborn every second of the day. They just need to be in the same room as someone. DSD would be fine to monitor them in my eyes

THISnewbeginning · 27/07/2025 12:31

You know someone doesn't constantly need eyes fixed to the baby yeah?