Gave cpr. Not heard anything from the victim. Is it ok to feel a little sad?

Professionals are completely different, they choose to do it, are the right people
to do it, do it regularly and are throughly trained for one thing. A brief work course several years prior to staying alive isn’t the same.

And no sorry I think those that are saved have a part to play. I couldn’t imagine not reaching out to be frank and I’ve in that position.

You said he was questioning whether or not he would do it again before he was thanked by the family.

That is not processing. That is expecting thanks.

If he wants to process what happened, then he needs to speak to someone that is not the patient or their family. Again, plenty or organisations mentioned on this thread.

Let's remember that paramedics are generally given the appropriate support and they also have each other. They are trained in how to deal with these things mentally. The average lay person is not.

Because I never said it was from wanting them to be grateful enough( as you’re conveniently now leaving out). It’s about processing as I’ve said multiple times.

Processing it is for him to deal with though, possibly with support from his own family and outside agencies. Several have been mentioned on this thread.
But not from the person he did CPR or on or their family.

Paramedics (or anyone in emergency services) do not expect thanks or anything from the people they help. It is no different for members of the public.

When the dust dies down it is the right thing to do unless we want the general public to back off and not do anything in these situations.

This is what you said. How am I twisting it. It’s exactly what you meant.

I don't think this is really about thank yous. I think closure is what you need.

We do someone a favour and they say thanks. Someone does us a favour and we say thanks. The matter is then concluded.

Without contact, OP is left hanging. This wasn't a simple favour like lending someone a fiver or looking after a DC for an hour. It was a very traumatic thing to have to do.

I suspect the event is playing on OP's mind a lot and she needs/wants to box it up and conclude things.

Didn’t say that as is abundantly clear but hey you keep twisting 🙄

It’s traumatic, risky and takes a huge amount of be bravery if you’re not a professional. It’s not about thanks but processing.

This. That someone would let a person die because they can’t guarantee they would be ‘grateful enough’ is shocking.

That’s a bit ridiculous. You don’t do CPR to be thanked. You certainly don’t suggest that someone who has nearly died has a responsibility to thank the person who did COR on them immediately, otherwise the ‘general public’ will stop intervening when occasion calls.

It’s wasn’t about thanks at all but processing it
amd whether he did the right thing. Quite shocking that those whose loved ones have been saved by a member of the public going out on a limb and doing something quite traumatic and risky don’t even see the need to check in with them when the dust has settled. I guess it’s a sign of today’s society.

If you do something for the thanks and acknowledgment, then you are doing it for the wrong reason.
Rather shocking that your husband would question whether or not to give someone else CPR based on not being thanked by the previous person.

Well the man my husband helped to save managed to acknowledge my husband when he was back on his feet. It takes 2 minutes. He was questioning if he’d do it again before he was approached by the family. Ive been in the position myself with loved one who had CPR in a traumatic situation. When the dust dies down it is the right thing to do unless we want the general public to back off and not do anything in these situations.

They are going through their own trauma, not to mention possible medical issues either linked to the cardiac arrest or the cause of the cardiac arrest.

8 weeks after my sons cardiac arrest, I could barely think straight. I was still having flashbacks. Nothing else but my son and our trauma was my priority at that stage. It is still hard to think about 17 months later.

Completely agree. It’s unbelievably difficult in real life, and you definitely aren’t singing Bee Gees songs. You are listening to the dispatcher’s instructions, praying the sirens mean real help is coming and desperately trying not to fail. The sound of ribs cracking isn’t one you forget easily. I had no clue that happened and was crying at the thought I’d done more harm than good.

Well done, the trauma from carrying out cpr passes, real cpr is nothing like the movies, it has a heavy impact.
I had flashbacks for weeks, the person didn't survive. It was the act not the outcome that shook me.
I hope you feel better soon.

In someone needing CPR almost all body functions have shut down to the point of fatality. It’s reasonable for OP to feel proud of herself that she achieved something rare - someone surviving amateur CPR in those circumstances. What’s not reasonable is to expect the recipient of that CPR to remember it, given the severity of the situation, or to be aware of who did what and when.

1. Bearing in mind someone has to be unconsious before you can perform CPR how can she possibly know it was you who did it?
2. She might not have wanted to be resuccitated.

I did CPR on a neighbour in the street, he died. His wife has never looked at me, let alone spoken to me in the 14 years since.

What else would you call it ?

Really no need for the dramatic “trying not to die”🙄

Ok we’ll leave it there because neither of us know whether OP’s details were taken or not. And if not, then the person she saved clearly doesn’t even know she was involved because she was too busy trying not to die at the time.

I’ve acknowledged that Op did a wonderful thing. But that absolutely doesn’t entitle her to seek support from the person she saved. There are support services out there which can do that. How is that unkind ?

My husband has done it twice. Once in the street His details were taken. Sorry but I disagree, it takes 2 minutes to send a note or message and if somebody goes through something traumatic for you and saves your life you do actually owe them something. As a society taking the bravery and kindness of others for granted doesn’t do anybody any favours.