Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be terrified that I have rendered myself infertile?

62 replies

Roundofapplauses · 26/07/2025 19:09

I have just been tested and informed that I have contracted chlamydia, and herpes.
Please no judgement, I have been with my partner for years. I was told that both chlamydia and herpes can be symptomless, so I have no idea for how long I have had it. It would have to be longer than 3 years now, at this point.

We have been ttc for around 2 years, as in, not using any contraception and having very regular sex, and nothing has happened.

Have I made myself permanently infertile?

OP posts:
Original poster
Roundofapplauses · 26/07/2025 20:30

IsItTheBlackOneOrTheRedOne · 26/07/2025 20:29

I think it was you saying you’ve been with your partner “for years” and yet your only conclusion was that you must have caught it before him. No thought or fear that he might have given it to you by being unfaithful. I struggle to understand how it wouldn’t have crossed your mind?

Show quote history

I also said, in a different message here….
‘I know no one can ever be sure, but I am as sure as sure. We have lived together almost from the start and other than work (we work at the same place too!), we are either at home together or out with friends together.’

OP posts:
IsItTheBlackOneOrTheRedOne · 26/07/2025 20:29

Roundofapplauses · 26/07/2025 20:22

Being that we were very young and stupid, no.
Of course I regret that now.
Why would this not be real? Wow!

Show quote history

I think it was you saying you’ve been with your partner “for years” and yet your only conclusion was that you must have caught it before him. No thought or fear that he might have given it to you by being unfaithful. I struggle to understand how it wouldn’t have crossed your mind?

Didimum · 26/07/2025 20:29

Pelvic inflammatory disease from chlamydia is what can cause infertility, not chlamydia itself.

Dearnurse · 26/07/2025 20:26

Herpes does not affect fertility, chlamydia however can , don't panic if you had not symptoms just speak to your gp & ask to be referred to a specialist as your having fertility issues . Your partner also need to be on antibiotics or he will infect you again .. its something like 1 in 3 people have herpes I wouldn't worry too much about that x

Dodeedoo · 26/07/2025 20:26

IsItTheBlackOneOrTheRedOne · 26/07/2025 20:21

Are you really saying that neither of you got checked before having unprotected sex? On the vanishingly tiny chance that this is real, he will certainly have these infections too.

No need for the nastiness and judgement.

Op, get a hycosy test, it is a test to check if your tubes a blocked which is something that I can occur due to those stis. Sorry that you are going through this x

Original poster
Roundofapplauses · 26/07/2025 20:22

IsItTheBlackOneOrTheRedOne · 26/07/2025 20:21

Are you really saying that neither of you got checked before having unprotected sex? On the vanishingly tiny chance that this is real, he will certainly have these infections too.

Being that we were very young and stupid, no.
Of course I regret that now.
Why would this not be real? Wow!

OP posts:
IsItTheBlackOneOrTheRedOne · 26/07/2025 20:21

Are you really saying that neither of you got checked before having unprotected sex? On the vanishingly tiny chance that this is real, he will certainly have these infections too.

Original poster
Roundofapplauses · 26/07/2025 19:53

GivingUpFinally · 26/07/2025 19:49

Really sorry you're going through this. Take the meds you need to and attend any check ups. They should be able to give you some direction.

I'm sorry I don't have any other words of advice or experience to share.

If possible may be go private and see what they advise.

Thank you

OP posts:
Original poster
Roundofapplauses · 26/07/2025 19:52

bluecurtains14 · 26/07/2025 19:51

They can both be around for years, but are you sure of his fidelity? Asymptomatic chlamydia is much less likely to affect fertility than symptomatic and herpes doesn't at all so try not to stress too much. TTC for 2 years needs to = GP appointment.

I know no one can ever be sure, but I am as sure as sure. We have lived together almost from the start and other than work (we work at the same place too!), we are either at home together or out with friends together.

Thank you

OP posts:
bluecurtains14 · 26/07/2025 19:51

They can both be around for years, but are you sure of his fidelity? Asymptomatic chlamydia is much less likely to affect fertility than symptomatic and herpes doesn't at all so try not to stress too much. TTC for 2 years needs to = GP appointment.

GivingUpFinally · 26/07/2025 19:49

Really sorry you're going through this. Take the meds you need to and attend any check ups. They should be able to give you some direction.

I'm sorry I don't have any other words of advice or experience to share.

If possible may be go private and see what they advise.

Original poster
Roundofapplauses · 26/07/2025 19:49

Bump

OP posts: