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Original poster

To think I never want another man?

170 replies

Bourneo · 26/07/2025 18:49

Ok, so I'm on holiday, a little bit tipsy and had the briefest, most fleeting of thoughts... maybe it's time. Maybe I should dip my toe in the water and try online dating again.... before the blood in veins ran cold and I fully considered the horrors that would bring to my peaceful existence.

So go on, hit me with your pros and cons of dating again.

For context, this is purely light hearted. I have a 10 year old, no childcare, narcissist ex, excellent vibrator, my own house and a good career. Plus a cute dog for company. What could a man add to my life besides stress! ? 🤣

OP posts:
Idontknowhatnametochoose · 26/07/2025 21:12

I've given up on men. The peace of being single is worth the loneliness I sometimes feel. And I'm about to take part in more meet up events to combat the occasional evening loneliness.

My dog and cat are my most wonderful companions..

dollyblue01 · 26/07/2025 21:10

I agree don’t bother it’s too much hassle especially if you have a child, Im in a relationship but wish I’d never bothered it’s like having another child, there was some good things to start with but they’ve quickly done and the rose tinted glasses are now well and truly off.
I was single for 18 months and looking back it was the best time ever , had time for me to do whatever and whenever I wanted , now I just don’t and it’s not worth it , stay as you are and enjoy life , men to be are just another hassle you don’t need.

miserableandworried · 26/07/2025 21:07

GulliaumeDuc · 26/07/2025 20:25

There aren’t any pros. If anything happened to DH, I wouldn’t go there with a bargepole. I just couldn’t be arsed.

Me neither. And my DH is a good one!

Wynter25 · 26/07/2025 21:05

I'm trying online dating and atm it sucks!

Notmycircusnotmyotter · 26/07/2025 21:04

i was very very happy on my own. Met someone at work. Amazing human and phenomenal sex, loved and adores me, but still I wouldn't give up living alone (with my children) for anything.

ASimpleLampoon · 26/07/2025 21:02

Men is too much headache

GettingFestiveNow · 26/07/2025 20:55

My brain misread "briefest" as "Brie Fest".

YANBU.

Account734 · 26/07/2025 20:52

The vote is currently at 100% You are not being unreasonable. I think that's the first time I've even seen a vote that's not split.

BriceNobeslovesMurielHeslop · 26/07/2025 20:51

It’s taken me a long time to admit to myself that.. I just like being single. I used to tie myself in knots hoping for a man, worrying about him when I had one, crying about it when it was all over. I had a broken picker and always would pick these strange men thinking I’d be the one to save him.

Today I meandered down to the hairdresser, meandered over to the farmer’s market, bought some ridiculous wee napkins with puffins on them, and meandered home. I’m going to have a bath and then watch a film (maybe Manhunter, ironically). No crying, nobody’s socks to pick up other than my own. It was, in the language of the poets, absolutely banging.

Mum2jenny · 26/07/2025 20:48

No pros imo. You have good dog, access to a good vibrator, so why would you want a man.
I’ve got a good man, but once he passes, no way would I want another.
Just live your life to the full. If a good man passes by, maybe it’s worth a punt?

iseethembloom · 26/07/2025 20:46

I thought I’d found someone amazing on OLD.

Turns out he’d faced a charge for attempted murder (although was acquitted).

Let it happen organically or not at all.

tilypu · 26/07/2025 20:44

youreactinglikeafunmum · 26/07/2025 19:47

Just sex and foreign trips imo 😭😭

A vibrator is great but sometimes you need to feel the weight of a man on you

Other than that, crack on, your life sounds lovely 😍

You don't need a man to go abroad. They even let women travel alone these days 😁. Honestly, I've loved every solo trip I've done.

tilypu · 26/07/2025 20:41

I've been single for fifteen years.

Every now and then I think it might be nice to find someone.

And then I remember that my best days now as a single woman are as good as they ever were when I've been in a relationship, and my worst days now are significantly better than my worst days when I wasn't single.

I can't speak for everyone. I know women that don't enjoy being single. Don't come at me if that's not your experience - if you are happily partnered/married, that's great!

But op, there's a lot to be said for the single life!

Praying4Peace · 26/07/2025 20:32

I was badly affected by the break up of a relationship along time ago which impacted on my ability to fall in love again. But I have a couple of times and I can honestly say that the juice isn't worth the squeeze. I've fallen in love with divorced men and it doesn't take long to work out why their wives divorced them.

GulliaumeDuc · 26/07/2025 20:25

There aren’t any pros. If anything happened to DH, I wouldn’t go there with a bargepole. I just couldn’t be arsed.

mathanxiety · 26/07/2025 20:23

Put down the glass, back away from the bar, find a bucket of ice cold water, and dunk your head in it.

youreactinglikeafunmum · 26/07/2025 19:47

Just sex and foreign trips imo 😭😭

A vibrator is great but sometimes you need to feel the weight of a man on you

Other than that, crack on, your life sounds lovely 😍

Blanca87 · 26/07/2025 18:56

You. Are.Enough. 😍

ladyinwaiting99 · 26/07/2025 18:55

Every time I have a wobble like that I do a quick search of Mumsnet threads and I can guarantee that one (or more) will convince me not to bother.
I love being single but do, occasionally, look round at happy couples and think that it might be nice.

BCBird · 26/07/2025 18:53

I can't think of an argument to convince you OP, sorry. I don't know if I can be bothered again. Did online dating 10 and then 5 years ago. From what people the whole landscape has changed. Enjoy your holiday.

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