Is my best friend racist?

They're getting very inventive.

I live about 10 miles from Leicester, one of the most diverse, multi cultural cities in Europe. Over the last 50 years the city has experienced wave after wave of immigration. We have large Indian, Pakistani, Polish, Somali, Turkish, Kurdish & other East European communities. Among many others. Many of these communities live in their own areas & exist in silos, rarely making any attempt to integrate with others. Decades of ‘white flight’ out of the city mean that white British people are now one minority population among many.

Based on my own experiences of living for decades with Leicester as my local city, I agree with every word OPs friend said. She is absolutely correct, and not in any way racist.

She not racist and I agree with her wholeheartedly.

Yep, I wonder if those are OP’s views, presented as her friend’s.

In that case, you have no idea what you're talking about.

It’s a tricky one.

Your friend might have an issue with very different cultures personally, but as a whole the country had/has an issue with immigrants no matter where they come from, as anyone could see from Brexit. It was European immigrants and it was still an issue.

Saying that, I think all countries, to a bigger or a lesser extent, have issues with immigrants, probably due to seeing their surroundings change too much and feeling “pushed out”, even if there’s no basis in lived experience.

I agree that it’s naive to think opposite cultures can coexist unless the incoming culture wants to assimilate. And by that I don’t mean forget your culture, I mean respect the surrounding culture and people.

I’m an immigrant and my partner is British and we still butt heads all the time because it’s a topic we’ll never see eye to eye - he’ll never fully understand the immigrant experience because it’s a reality that his country doesn’t have. It’s as simple as that. Retiring abroad doesn’t count.

Your friend is 1000% correct. I'm half Black and I've been saying this for years. I get very frustrated with people bandying the term 'racist' about so casually. I recommend reading Samuel Huntingdon's 'Clash of Civilisations'.

Sounds like you’re living in a bubble and very naive.

Although the way in which it is written, I would say it’s your opinion rather than a ‘friend’

I caught that as well. Such a detailed post..

I’ve said many times it’s not the skin colour it’s the culture. Could just as easily be another white culture that jars. I agree with your friend.

A combination of our humour, witty sarcasm, politeness (ever said sorry when someone walks into you? British? Bet you have), desire to be orderly (generally, someone playing music out loud/ phone calls on speaker on the train? Side eye). Stiff upper lip, ‘keep calm and carry on’ (in the 2000s you’d have had that on a mug or cushion). The Royal Family, the Guard, red telephone boxes, the old letterboxes, bonfire night, old films Mary Poppins, Oliver Twist (“please sir can I have some more?”). Endless tea, biscuits, fish and chips on a Friday, a roast on a Sunday, a fry up, afternoon tea, Victoria sponge cake, up north then battered mars bar from the chippy (who thought of that?). Football, pub culture. Look at our schools, plays, hymn singing, country dancing, you must remember your year 6 play?, harvest festival (good morning mrs smith- bet you knew which rhythm to say that in).

This is all stuff seems small but we all collectively experience it (mostly or generally). These are just aspects that make up our culture and our shared experience. If we went into historical culture and tradition there would be more.

They are unique to liberal democracies. I also think French culture is better than Irans.

western liberal democracies are extraordinary places for women.

What’s your point? That because there is still work to be done on women’s and girls rights in the UK we can’t say that the UK is far better for women than Iran?

LOL Is diversity also our strength and the U.K. was built by immigrants by any chance?

Integration is what she is complaining about not immigration. I agree with her. If I go to a Muslim country I respect that and dress appropriately. I wouldn’t travel anywhere without respect. If I couldn’t rep cr it I wouldn’t go. I know that’s different to living there. Just my point of view.

This question gets asked often in these kinds of debates and it is based on a massive fallacy.

First the denial that Britain might have a culture or values, then the demand to describe it in terms that are unique and separate from any other country's culture.

Of course there is huge overlap between the culture of the UK and its neighbours and allies, but that doesn't mean it doesnt have its unique elements, or even just place different emphasis on certain values or practices when compared with say France, Ireland or the USA. And just as there are countries very closely aligned on culture and values, some are less so.

Not read the other replies, but imo, you’re both right.

Some cultures don’t mix well, you can accept that and respect difference and be open, welcoming and compassionate at the same time.

And just because some cultures don’t mix, it doesn’t mean some people don’t discriminate based on skin colour. Racism is a real issue.

I'm part way between you and your friend, and I'm not white and an immigrant 3 times over.

Any immigrant to anywhere has to be able to hold onto their identity, but they also have to integrate into society where they now live.

It's about mutual respect, from one human to another.

You can't go to someone's country, flour their laws, not learn their language, assert your home culture when it's opposed to local culture, live in ignorance of the country you have moved to. Don't move there if you can't live there.

Equally, you should be allowed to move to another country and peacefully and harmlessly practice your religion and culture. You should be able to wear what you want, eat what you want, speak whatever language you want (in addition to the home country) and you must abide by the country's laws.

Obviously I'm excluding refugees and asylum seekers from the above, who in my eyes are temporary immigrants. If they choose to stay and are accepted to stay, then they must follow the above rules.

It’s not racist. It’s reality

Queuing
Being overly polite
Pub culture
Tea culture
Sarcasm
Cultural foods
Guy Fawkes
Christmas traditions

Another naive handwringing post about immigration. Ps I agree with your friend.

…ah well that’s ok then.

and they are unique to “British Culture” ?

You genuinely believe that there is equality for women and girls, in the UK?

No - it means that it is far worse in other countries. Quite obviously.