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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My partners family…am I in the wrong?

51 replies

Fruitpunch1 · 25/07/2025 09:56

Been with my partner 8 years, we have DD who’s 6.

His grandparents, aunties etc have seen my daughter once since she was born.
She has never had a birthday card, a gift or anything from them.
DP’s grandad makes effort for my partners sisters children, he’s taken them on days out, to the zoo, even Disney, but my daughter has never had so much as a card or anything.

After all of this my partners auntie and grandparents have decided they want to be in my daughter’s life and want to visit. I’ve said no, on the basis that they’ve ignored the fact she exists for 4 years, never bother with her, never even allow any time for her.

My partner thinks I’m being materialistic, however it’s not about the money, it’s the blatant favouritism.
AIBU in saying she’s not visiting?

OP posts:
Wavywoo · 25/07/2025 10:03

I can understand your reluctance. I think I would want to understand more about why they haven't been in yours/her lives so far, and what has changed.

A positive, loving relationship with wider family would be great for your DD, but I'd be wary of them disappearing again.

They need to have a good relationship with you too.