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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you don't just walk in

131 replies

Eerrnohun · 25/07/2025 09:19

Yesterday afternoon, sitting on the floor playing with my son. I hear the a knock at the front door and before I had time to get on to my feet, my aunt is bursting through the front door.
Didn't know she was planning on coming over so was very taken back at her just bounding in.

Even if I had known she was going to come over, I'd still expect her to wait until I'd answered the door. I don't enter her house, or anyone else's house without being invited in. We're not super close - see each other once every couple of months or so, so it's not like she's round all the time and just felt so welcome to let herself in.

AIBU to think it's rude as hell to just walk in?

And before anyone says it, yes I'm aware locking the door would stop people walking in but DH was in and out throughout the day.

OP posts:
housemaus · 25/07/2025 11:57

It was very normal growing up for friends/family but I don't love it either - I just keep the door locked.

Lambswools · 25/07/2025 11:56

Nevereatcardboard · 25/07/2025 11:53

This thread makes me understand exactly why the burglary rates are so high! Most thieves look for an easy opportunity and an unlocked door gives them very easy access to your home.

Unexpected visitors can wait for a minute to be let in. I don’t want anyone just walking into my home if I’m on the toilet etc

@Eerrnohun why can’t your husband take a key with him if he’s in and out of your home? Yes, your aunt was rude not to wait to be let in.

Umm, not to let the facts get in the way, but burgularly rates have been declining since the 1970s and are currently the lowest they've been in decades.

middleagedandinarage · 25/07/2025 11:56

Very normal in my family! Maybe it depends whether you were brought up with this being normal, my grandmothers house everyone just walks in, no-one even knocks and we've kind of just carried that on, I would usually knock, open the door and shout 'Hello' then walk in whether they know i'm coming or not tbh

ninjahamster · 25/07/2025 11:56

Totally normal in my family and friendship circle.

Cakeandusername · 25/07/2025 11:55

Lock your doors. I live in a nice safe area but there’s still opportunistic thefts where people will walk in and grab keys/handbag etc. Plus risk of pets and small children getting out.

Nevereatcardboard · 25/07/2025 11:53

This thread makes me understand exactly why the burglary rates are so high! Most thieves look for an easy opportunity and an unlocked door gives them very easy access to your home.

Unexpected visitors can wait for a minute to be let in. I don’t want anyone just walking into my home if I’m on the toilet etc

@Eerrnohun why can’t your husband take a key with him if he’s in and out of your home? Yes, your aunt was rude not to wait to be let in.

LBFseBrom · 25/07/2025 11:50

Keep your front door locked, your husband presumably has a key and it's not a big deal to use it.

Your aunt was rude. I've never done that in my life, neither has anyone just walked into my home, don't know anybody who would.

Ooodelally · 25/07/2025 11:49

Awfully rude, I’d never saying anything but the door would always be locked going forward!

Verbena17 · 25/07/2025 11:48

Surely your DH has a key he can use to let himself in and out.
Unless you live on a military base, surely you’d be safer locking your front door?
We lock our door every single time anyone comes in or leaves.
The only we didn’t was living on bases, where the guy at the front gate has a rifle 😉

Meandmyguy · 25/07/2025 11:43

This is normal in my house.

I can't remember the last time my brother knocked on the door.

If you don't like it, tell her.

Bjorkdidit · 25/07/2025 11:39

UnreadyEthel · 25/07/2025 10:42

This is perfectly normal where I live, and I would get mildly annoyed at having to interrupt whatever I was doing to go and answer the door to somebody who could have just walked in. If you don’t want people to just walk in then you have to either tell them or leave the door on the latch/locked.

Exactly. She's saved you the bother of getting up to answer the door.

U53rName · 25/07/2025 11:38

So when your door’s unlocked and some rando walks into your kitchen, steals your handbag/keys, and drives off in your car, do you think your insurance will pay out?

26dX · 25/07/2025 11:35

God my in laws do this 🙄 I lock the door now haha

Beachtastic · 25/07/2025 11:34

Get a water pistol!

tripleginandtonic · 25/07/2025 11:29

FightingTemeraire · 25/07/2025 09:20

For some people, this would be entirely normal. If you don’t like it, it’s up to you to say so.

This

Natsku · 25/07/2025 11:29

Everyone who knows me just walks in because they know the doorbell doesn't work. At my FIL's everyone just walks in too. At my neighbours I knock then walk in. But you don't do it unless you know the people that live there are fine with it, that's the key thing.

Nearly50omg · 25/07/2025 11:29

Eerrnohun · 25/07/2025 10:35

Really never understand why people can't seem to read properly before answering. You can look back at my OP for the reason the door was not locked.

I had zero fear of child escaping as there's a closed gate on the door of the room we were in.

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A nutter could have walked in off the street and taken your kids! Anything can happen ffs and it’s just common sense to keep your front doors locked!

LoveWine123 · 25/07/2025 11:24

So did you ask her not to do it again?

Hankunamatata · 25/07/2025 11:23

Dh family are a knock and walk. Mine are a knock, crack the door and shout

Morgenrot25 · 25/07/2025 11:17

I'd hate anyone just walking into my house, but some families are closer than others - my aunties all live hundreds of miles away so I would be a tad shocked if they appeared in the lounge, but other folk are very close (physically and emotionally) and would be happy with that set up. It's your house, set your boundaries, perhaps lock the door if you don't want anyone to just walk in.

onwardandupwards · 25/07/2025 11:14

I have a front and back door with no door handle problem solved, can only be opened with a key and pushed from outside or by latch inside.

CatamaranViper · 25/07/2025 11:13

I never do it if someone isn't expecting me but otherwise I'm a door opener

SunflowerLife · 25/07/2025 11:09

Every person I know who has a front door that just opens off the street has had people walk in, from an unexpected mother in law, delivery men and even a random man who thought it was someone else's house. The solution is to lock your door. She was wrong to walk in but you left your house accessible so that's something you can change.

DappledThings · 25/07/2025 11:08

Vimtolady · 25/07/2025 11:06

It’s about invasion of privacy. I don’t like it, whereas he doesn’t mind it. One of us has to give, and I think it’s more reasonable for it to be the person who doesn’t care than the person who does.

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But it's not an invasion of your privacy for you to enter his home. And it's not an invasion of his privacy as he doesn't consider it so.

He respects your privacy but you won't respect his own feelings in his home. Maybe he doesn't like getting up to answer the door. Pretty rude of you to make him when he's asked you not to.

TheCurious0range · 25/07/2025 11:07

Vimtolady · 25/07/2025 11:06

It’s about invasion of privacy. I don’t like it, whereas he doesn’t mind it. One of us has to give, and I think it’s more reasonable for it to be the person who doesn’t care than the person who does.

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But it's his privacy. You realise there is no logic to your argument

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