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Things my husband asked me today (light hearted)

286 replies

ButtSurgery · 24/07/2025 12:31

So far today:

Sent him to Lidl with a small shopping list. Phoned to ask whether cottage cheese is the same thing as sour cream and if not, where is it in the shop.

Phoned again to ask how big is 2 pints of milk and is that different from 2 litres of milk.

Phoned later from the local garage to ask if I wanted a new tyre on the car as it has a nail through it and a slow puncture. He is at the garage for an appointment to get the front tyres checked and replaced if needed anyway as they were around the legal minimum.

Phoned again to tell me his work have bounced his expenses because he needs to send them to another email address. What is the email address he needs to contact? (note we work for wholly unrelated employers).

What time is the dog walker coming? Does he need to be here to hand her over or does the dog walker come in with a key and pick her up? (note we have had the walker for months and he knows the drill is to hand the dog over!)

What time am I finishing work? SAME TIME I FINISHED EVERY BLOODY DAY.

Oh there's more but they are the stand out ones. He needs to fuck off back to sea.

OP posts:
ButtSurgery · 24/07/2025 18:45

MoveOverToTheSea · 24/07/2025 14:56

Then send him doing some weeding or whatever other boring as gp he’ll job that needs to be done.

Because I’d struggle to be lighthearted about those questions, I have to say. You’re not his in house entertainer.

Funnily enough, he has weeded everywhere today. Thank god. It was a bit triffid-like around here.

OP posts:
Luckyingame · 24/07/2025 18:45

My husband (75), does absolutely what he can, didn't ask me (46) anything, but since I'm going on a (duty visit) holiday to see my mother, he said in a very sad voice "And now I'll have to think for
myself".
He'll do fine (married for 20 years).

The other husband sounds terribly uninformed.

placemats · 24/07/2025 18:43

I think a worldwide campaign should be started in which every woman in a relationship with a man who behaves like this should turn the tables.

What's for dinner?
Where's my favourite shoes?
Have you seen my handbag?
Do you know what cupsize I am? Buying a new bra.

The list is endless women. Go for it! 😁

Welikebeingcosy · 24/07/2025 18:32

PussInBin20 · 24/07/2025 18:18

when going out my DH regularly asks me if he should wear a coat! I started to tell him “you’re an adult I’m sure you can decide this for yourself”.

He now asks me if I’m going to wear my coat 🙄

Tell him you're waiting to see what he does first...or reverse it completely and say "do you think I should or not?" 😂

Mirabai · 24/07/2025 18:25

MummyDummyNow · 24/07/2025 12:53

Is he Neurodivergent?

No I think he’s thick.

SanFranBear · 24/07/2025 18:20

One or two questions - lighthearted...

Three or four - getting annoying but OK, you're having an off day

The six you list here with the caveat 'and there's more' - fuck that, what is the point of him!

RantzNotBantz · 24/07/2025 18:20

He needs to fuck off back to sea.

He won't be able to find it.

gamerchick · 24/07/2025 18:19

It's the mental load. It's fucking irritating when they fall into the habit of treating you like they don't want to think for themselves.

Ask him if yo want to wipe his arse for him as well, often enough for him to notice. Or tell him to see his GP as his toodles are obviously slipping if he can't work shit out for himself.

PussInBin20 · 24/07/2025 18:18

when going out my DH regularly asks me if he should wear a coat! I started to tell him “you’re an adult I’m sure you can decide this for yourself”.

He now asks me if I’m going to wear my coat 🙄

Welikebeingcosy · 24/07/2025 18:17

abracadabra1980 · 24/07/2025 17:20

Well if he's always been away at sea, and you have just taken on 99.9% of the domestic chores without communication, then I completely understand why he's asking these questions.

Not an excuse. When I left home at 17 having never had the chance to do any of the day to day house running tasks, or admin, I still managed to figure it all out.

Welikebeingcosy · 24/07/2025 18:14

ButteredRadish · 24/07/2025 18:09

Don’t be so uptight! It’s funny. Men like this are actually quite often highly, highly intelligent in other areas. Some of the men who were seemingly the most lacking in common sense I’ve ever come across, have been high achievers in their work life. I knew a Professor of Engineering once who didn’t even know that America was in a different time zone e to the UK, let alone has several time zones within it. An Airline Captain who couldn’t operate an iPhone, a Doctor who didn’t know what Algebra was, another who didn’t know that Australia’s seasons are the opposite to ours and why…. I could go on but you get the picture.

Edited

More than likely it's not because they're lacking in other areas, but because they've had their ego fed so much for following 'manly' academic routes that they think that having to stop and work something out, outside of their remit is beyond them, and someone else can do the thinking for them.

Judiezones · 24/07/2025 18:14

What parcel?
I ordered something online that is for an important birthday, I showed him, told him when it's arriving, which day, time, who's bringing it.
I said just now, I wonder where my parcel is. He replied, What parcel?

ButteredRadish · 24/07/2025 18:09

TaborlinTheGreat · 24/07/2025 12:41

He sounds utterly thick and useless frankly, OP. How can any adult not know that 2 pints are not the same as 2 litres?!

Don’t be so uptight! It’s funny. Men like this are actually quite often highly, highly intelligent in other areas. Some of the men who were seemingly the most lacking in common sense I’ve ever come across, have been high achievers in their work life. I knew a Professor of Engineering once who didn’t even know that America was in a different time zone e to the UK, let alone has several time zones within it. An Airline Captain who couldn’t operate an iPhone, a Doctor who didn’t know what Algebra was, another who didn’t know that Australia’s seasons are the opposite to ours and why…. I could go on but you get the picture.

TheLurpackYears · 24/07/2025 18:06

You are being unreasonable to call this level of head fuckery light hearted. He is sapping you and it isn't loving or kind.

Welikebeingcosy · 24/07/2025 18:06

After me reading this thread and posting on here about my weaponised incompetence friend, almost like some kind of script, he's just text me and asked me which is the nearest airport to our town. 🙈. I asked him if Google has crashed and he's said 'yep'. So I've replied 'good to know.'

CustardySergeant · 24/07/2025 18:05

HangingOver · 24/07/2025 15:10

"am I hungry?"

Baffling

😮 Oh my god. How ludicrous.

LadySuzanne · 24/07/2025 18:04

ButtSurgery · 24/07/2025 13:22

Yes, he usually is this irritating.
Yes, it's deeply deeply unattractive.
No, it wasn't always this bad.

I don't know if he does it at work. He recently retired from the Navy after 25 years, leaving as a PO - so a reasonable decision making and managerial level. They even gave him firearms and put him in charge of others with firearms FFS. I did ask why no one had asked me for my opinion on the risks of this decision.

He has a new job at sea, but no ship at present so is driving me batty at home. I WFH full time and have done for years. He is very bored.

After 25 years in the navy has he become institutionalized?

That is, he carries out his work duties competently but can no longer function independently outside of a structured environment where others are responsible for sorting the mundane stuff which we all have to deal with as adults.

Jaggy1 · 24/07/2025 18:02

babe do you know where my ‘x’ is?

Insert anything & everything he’s wearing/used/needed today.

Namechangerage · 24/07/2025 17:58

Iclyn · 24/07/2025 17:51

I've been called a fucking cow by mine . How do you fancy a swap ?

Um both are not ok! There are men who can do shopping by themselves and who also don’t call you a fucking cow! Raise the bar!!!

HelpMeGetThrough · 24/07/2025 17:57

Lighthearted? He sounds as thick as shit.

Namechangerage · 24/07/2025 17:56

TaborlinTheGreat · 24/07/2025 12:41

He sounds utterly thick and useless frankly, OP. How can any adult not know that 2 pints are not the same as 2 litres?!

Yep - why do you answer the phone OP?!

PussInBin20 · 24/07/2025 17:56

Olderkids · 24/07/2025 15:03

Whenever we are on holiday somewhere new I get a hundred questions about bus and taxi fares, distances, restaurant choices, on and on.

” don’t know, I haven’t been here before either!”

OMG my DH is like this! Just because I book and organise the holidays he thinks I know absolutely everything.

Mine never pays attention to his surroundings either or what the hotel looks like. Last year he didn’t even know what resort we were in.

It is exhausting (& frustrating) tbh.

In my opinion, it’s pure laziness. They can’t be bothered to use their own brain.

Iclyn · 24/07/2025 17:51

I've been called a fucking cow by mine . How do you fancy a swap ?

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 24/07/2025 17:50

. sorry wrong thread..
I laughed my head off at asking you if two pints was the same as two litres. Is he pre decimalisation?

Tink3rbell30 · 24/07/2025 17:49

Massive ick.

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