Why are people so obsessed with touching babies?

Or she does chill out and they show little interest in the future.

Plenty of parents have expressed on here that family were happy to take the baby off of them and pass them around but once the baby stage is over they all disappear.

There is no guarantee either way and the point still stands that it is unnecessary to be in a baby’s face when it is obvious they are unsettled and their parents would like to settle them without people still trying to take them.

You can show interest without being rude.

I have never understood the urge to hold or get in the face of other peoples babies even my own nephews who I love!
I think people need to learn to let children settle in new situations!

Well yes, grandparents cuddling her while she's crying because she'd rather be with her mother, or is hungry, or is tired, or just doesn't want to be cuddled by whoever has her at the time is to her detriment. They are literally upsetting her for their own gain because they want baby cuddles and not for her benefit. Like the relatives in the OP that are grabbing at a tired overwhelmed baby that wants nothing to do with them.

That is why I took her off them and give her what she actually needs, because newborn babies don't need cuddles from grandparents, they need those later. At the start they need security with their primary care giver and their basic needs met. Now she's old enough to show who she does and doesn't want with body language and vocalisations it's not an issue anymore. She cuddles who she wants to cuddle and smacks away the people who were really grabby with her when she was a baby so I think that shows her opinion on the matter! She adores her grandparents and plays with them for hours on end so putting her needs before theirs clearly didn't harm her or the grandparent bond did it.

The only people who claim it is an issue is the grabby grandparents who aren't getting what they deem their fair share of baby cuddles.

YANBU I absolutely hated this stage, especially strangers just sticking their hands into babies pram 🫣

Personally, I would never, want or ever try to touch a strangers baby, unless asked to, maybe to help out for some reason (?) that would be a bit weird to me, but if the baby is related, I would honestly want them or myself to have a little hold / cuddle, but would also respect the parents wishes if that's not OK with them.
I used to love it when my family wanted to have a 'baby cuddle' - not everyone has the plague, and a 'baby cuddle' can do wonders for that persons feelings, & baby bonding, if that's still a thing - maybe a quick hold / even hold hands with said baby can make someone's day, in the right circumstances. (Also, selfishly thinking - future babysitting?? One day that may be a real issue?)

The baby doesn't know or care, as long as he / she is safe. And the parent is there, with them. As long as said people are clean, & respectful,(with a family baby), I cannot see the problem.(Unless, baby needs a feed / sleep etc eg after a long journey, as mentioned).
(And following & watch BF is totally not acceptable in any way at all unless the person is OK with it - I would have kicked them out).
But totally agree - NOT strangers. Oh, no, not my baby.
PS Light-heartedly - I guess it almost has stopped when my 'baby' became a 6' 4" man, but his aunties & family still give him a cuddle! And he hugs back. (But no, not strangers - I would still bomp them away, if he wasn't comfortable - even if he is over a foot taller than me, lol - squishy or not).(Tiger Mum etc). xx

If you’re lucky your baby will have happy and fulfilling relationships with your friends and family and will be confident with other people. I’m sure that’s what you meant to say, isn’t it?

Quite!

I mean I'm personally a bit obsessed with babies. To me they are the cutest, loveliest things ever. I would happily cuddle babies all day. I have a one year old and remain broody when it comes to babies 😂 I totally get why people go a bit crazy for them. I think there is just something special about a baby!

But having said that, I wouldn't harass someone to hold their baby or get in their face, etc. They are just simple boundaries to follow.

On the flip side, it would also suck if you're family wasn't interested.

It’s anthropolgy.

Babies need lots of care so are as cute as possible to get it.

Babies are only attractive to their mothers, let's be honest. Most of them look like malformed potatoes. Everyone else is being polite. Don't kid yourself.

In reality they are noisy stinky and irritating with a plastic faeces retaining bag strapped to their nether regions.

Yet the parents never accept my polite refusal when asked to hold it so I stiffen, the child is handed to me and the inevitable happens.

Face scrunches up and goes red, it retches, vomits, and then does that weird arching, striving thing with arms and legs. Generally at that stage it is removed.

But if you have people willing to put up with that, fill your boots and have a great time!

I would pass it around freely and take time for yourself.

If you're lucky one of them will soon be covered in vomit or shit and serve them right!

Yes it is so much healthier to show no interest in a baby then there would be over dramatics of no one cares

Strangers?….Intermittent cuddles with grandparents when it wasn’t to her detriment? Bloody hell!

You'd be pissed off if they said 'What's it's name again?' and then walked straight past you excitedly because the host's new puppy or kitten had been brought out.

It's a normal, natural human evolutionary instinct. That instinct is also why puppies and kittens are so appealing. It's how humans have survived and animals have been domesticated.

In other cultures babies get passed around and have a jolly old time. People aren't so uptight.

Babies need to be cuddled by their parents. Not strangers. They especially don't need strangers anywhere near them when they have barely any immune system and aren't old enough to be vaccinated yet because that's how you get sick babies. They also don't need to be cuddled by relatives who don't thrive a shit that the baby is tired, upset, crying, just wants it's mum because they're entitled to their cuddles.

It's really strange to jump straight to babies never being cuddled as a form of emotional neglect just because I don't want other people all over my baby.

My baby was constantly cuddled by me and her father, she had intermittent cuddles from her grandparents and aunts when it wasn't to her detriment and just to fulfill their desires. I have taken her off several family members who were being overbearing with her. At 14 months she's ahead of all her milestones and thriving. She's happy, secure, speaking well, really playful and sociable with other children at nursery and play group and has never been sick. Guess she didn't need those strangers getting their grubby hands all over her after all!

I agree with @Overtheway it’s human nature, evolution, call it what you like.
We circle around the infant to ensure it’s safe, clocking its existence in case of emergency. Just like elephants and whales working together to protect the group’s young.

https://animalresearcher.com/why-do-elephants-form-protective-circles-around-their-calves/

God I’d have been delighted if a load of relatives wanted to hold my baby for a bit. My DS was super fractious. I was just grateful for the time off. Any reason why a relative couldn’t settle your baby? My MIL and one of my aunts were fantastic at it! Everyone says they want a “village” and wonders why they don’t have one, then at the same time rejects that village when they get involved! Madness.

People love babies. You are massively overreacting.

If you went and no one gave a shit, you'd be on MN complaining about it.

As others have said, babies are supposed to be part of a community. They are precious and need the protection of adults. Inorder to do.this they are cute, unlike adults, who can look after themselves. We are all also programmed to respond to distressed babies.

When DDs were young and we spent summers in Italy, they were literally passed around the hotel guests and staff, not one of whom I had met before. They were cuddled, kissed, loved. How blessed they were.

I am a baby person but I'm also a "respect parents boundaries" advocate because I've been on the receiving end of people disregarding what I've said as a mother and it's crap.
I make sure mum/dad has the help they need if they are in my presence. If I get to hold baby, then fab. If they want me to make them a cuppa/give them some space instead that's grand too. Im normally just happy to spend time with my family.

I was never a baby person until mine were all grumpy teens. Now I love a squishy baby. I usually just do smiles and wave

Wow. You know that babies that are cuddled and loved and given lots of rounded affection from lots of people tend to thrive. They learn that they are special and people like them and that that's a good way to be treated.
That's how they socialise and how people form bonds with babies and therefore to look after them when they stop being quite so cute.

It's the same the world over and a very important stage of development.

Babies that aren't cuddled by anyone fail to thrive even if all that other needs are being met. That's how important touch is.

Yes, exactly!

This 🤣