Dads partner leaving him homeless after her death.

This is so true. He's always doing some sort of home improvements. He's been worth his weight in gold to her, not to mention very convenient! She mentioned to me that she has always funded everything they've had done on the house and never let my dad contribute a penny as she always knew the house would be left for her kids. Now I see it as her been very clever if not a bit sneaky!
Some sort of home improvement....I very much doubt that would cover all what he saved not paying rent. You didn't say if he owned or rented before he moved in with her. If he had a mortgage, what happened to the property? If he rented, well multiply what that rent was monthly by 12 and then 20. That's how much he should have saved, at least £150k I would think. Is that how much he has invested in her property.

As for caring for her, how long ago did he give up his job to do so. Even then, you don't know if he did it just for her or if it suited him too. Did he continue to pay 50% of all the bills? A few repairs or a couple of holidays won't come close to what he saved.

I totally get your anxiety and worry. It is indeed unfair that it might possibly fall on you but it's really your dad you should be angry with, not her. They lived under the same roof, but independently. Never married, never shared finances. She was clear her house would go to her kids from the start. He accepted it all, ultimately because it must have suited him too.

The only thing I find really odd is why the OP has been dragged into this situation now. Also why ask that the call not be mentioned to the father. Something is very off.

If he's been living there for 22 years rent free, then why wasn't he saving it for now? Surely he knew this situation would come one day. If he presents himself as homeless to the council they will house him. It may be a hotel room until they find something. Is he better off doing that now to secure a home for himself? That way he won't have too much on his plate when she passes away. She can arrange for carers if he's no longer living there.

Believe me that can mean nothing to some people once money is involved. I know that from bitter experience.

@Tray80 I’m not sure exactly what you wanting from this thread op? If she has been upfront and clear to him throughout their relationship then there is no debate …if he knew where he stood all this time then it would be on him to plan ahead for his own needs if she were to die first. It’s the same as I would advise for anyone in a relationship that isn’t married( or indeed ,a marriage where there are children from a previous relationship ) …you have to have these discussions as early as possible and plan/ put legal documents in place. The people I do feel sorry for are those that have absolutely no clue, having worked in hospice care I have indeed seen people literally left with no home because they didn’t realise terms of inheritance when they weren’t married and there is no will ( or, even ,worse, a will in place that the partner didn’t know about) .

I'm another one who is grateful for all the perspectives. I have a semi-estranged mother with a husband (they are married so that makes a difference) but he is devoted to his two daughters and I would imagine he has taken steps to ensure they inherit. My mother stepped in to care for his girls from a young age but she's a pretty toxic person. No problem for me if she doesn't inherit a bean, although it would be a bit unfair given she was in loco parentis for years and is now a devoted grandmother. But I know she does not have a nest egg. It's good to be a little prepared for what might happen. I hadn't thought of any of this.

What about all the hours of care he provided throughout years? How much she saved in that alone? And how selfless it was of your dad to do that?
Seek legal advice on that one as I do think there must be a way of challenging the will in some way.

Look at money box on bbc sounds they do programmes about inheritance etc. There could be something useful.
Check woth citizen advice and seek legal advice on that matter.

Good on you. There is a saying "don't count on chickens before they're hatched" which largely applies to inheritance laws when parents are divorced, remarried or living with a partner for many years.

Writing a will is not the end of the story. They can be successfully contested in Court if no provision for life partners, children or disabled defendants are made.

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I think you should have a frank discussion with this woman or text her. Say that you have taken time to process her message and while you are sympathetic to the situation you will not be in a position to help or care for your father in the future. - Be firm about this. - It seems unfair that despite quitting his job to be your carer, putting money into your house and spending so much time with your family - at times at the expense of his own child and grandchildren - that no provision has been made for him. Then say hope the operation goes well and dad feels he can carry on nursing you in these circumstances. Hope the future works out for you both.

If you want to be absolutely sure that you can leave your house to your adult kids then don't have a relationship. Stay single. You can't have the benefit of a relationship and expect no obligations.
Except if this lady had stayed single, unless one of her kids moved in with her, she'd have gone into a home or assisted living with her wheelchair and wouldn't have a house to leave. Good job she had a carer on hand who'd given up his own job to look after her.

I was in a similar position to you a few years ago and can completely understand your reaction of being bitter and perplexed, especially given the backdrop of your father's lack of effort with you. The handling of wills and estates often gives you an insight into the darker sides of people's characters, not to mention the resurfacing of all manner of family problems and dynamics.

My father was in his mid-70s when his partner died. She left her house (being the house in which she and my father resided) to her son. I don't recall my father ever mentioning any objections to the arrangement. But nor do I think he expected what would happen when she died, namely that her son kicked him out pretty much immediately so that the house could be sold. Before then, my father had what he thought was a good relationship with the son, and had even included him in his own will. I think he genuinely thought he would be allowed to remain in the house, perhaps not for life, but at least while he got back on his feet. He was shocked at how swiftly he was moved on.

Interestingly, a few decades earlier, my father's own father - my grandfather – had, very late in life, remarried his housekeeper a few years after my grandmother's death. Just before my grandfather's death, he changed his will so that his house went to his new wife. The whole episode reeked for many reasons. But my dad never challenged the new will because he was convinced the new wife would "do the right thing" and leave the house and contents to the original family when she died. Lo and behold, she did no such thing; she left everything to her own kids. Many of the grandchildren did not even get a keepsake from the personal effects.

So have you found out what she actually means when she says it's "in trust"?

Err well yeah they were decided on the facts but the point is that cohabitants in long term relationships where they were dependent on their partner tend to get quite generous financial provision. I wasn't saying he would get those specific amounts (they were different in each case). Or is there anything in the OP's posts that suggests to you that he would not be successful under the 1975 Act?

I would ring your stepmother and ask if the Trust she has arranged is a life interest trust. This would mean your Dad could live in the house until he dies and then the property would pass to her children.
I do wonder if there's been a misunderstanding here and your stepmother was trying to make you aware you would not benefit from any inheritance or interest in the property when your Dad dies?

Yes, my mum has told me she doesn’t expect me to boot her partner out straight away, which I wouldn’t, despite us not being very close.

He is however himself very well off, much more so than me or my mum. So financially he shouldn’t struggle to move. But it then comes down to logistics and financials, how easy would he find it to move (he was living with his own mum in his 40s before moving in with my mum) and I would also need to clarify who pays for repairs etc while he is there. I have my own mortgage and nursery fees so I can’t really afford upkeep of 2 houses. I’m sure this is also being considered for the DC to inherit in OP’s case.

I think it sounds like she has always been open about the fact that she wants the house to be inherited by her children.

I have known this situation in reverse- where the children got nothing from their dad's will as it all went to the step mum. Those children were so bitter when they were left with nothing and their fathers money ended up going to the step mums kids when she died.

Having children from a previous relationship is just an impossible situation to deal with I think. What is 'fair'to everyone in this situation? There is nothing that would please everyone. Of course she coukd have said that your father coukd live in the house until he dies, but as she said this means the children are waiting a long time for their inheritance.

Coukd you suggest that he is allowed a certain period of grace in the house before its sold? 5 years maybe? That happened to a friend of mine who had lived with someone in the same house for 50 years. The children of tge partner who died allowed him to stay for 3 years while he got himself together.

If he's older and homeless, the council will house him. And you don't have to take him in. (You'll find the council moves faster if you don't). And if he didn't bother with you much for so long, you shouldn't feel obliged to.

Tell him about the conversation you've had with her and ask him what money he has in his own right. Ask him what he plans to do - whether he'll rent or if he had enough to buy, whether he'll put in a council application etc. If he mentions any plans that involve staying with you, even temporarily, and you are not in fact going to allow that, it's only fair to him to tell him straight away. You may not owe him much but you owe him that; he can't plan without all the information.

Your dad needs to stay put in the house after her death. He children can go down the process of evicting him after her death. He may still die before her.

@Iocainepower yes , I hope you do the right thing and maybe encourage a discussion about it - I certainly don’t think it’s ok to expect your children not to inherit and it maybe get passed down to the step parents family at some point, but not do I think it’s ok that very long time live in partners are just booted out without a penny - unless of course they are complete arseholes !!

If she is leaving the house in Trust to her grandchildren surely this means your Dad gets to live in the house until he dies?

If he's close to her children and the worst does happen, hopefully they'll let him stay there.

My dad was also in this situation but died so we never had to find out what would have happened. He too was closer to his wife's children than he was to us, thankfully this improved towards the end. Not that I know her kids well but I think they would have let him stay in the house.

i do know someone in this situation by the way except the other way round, it was his mum who by then was 81 and had cared for her partner for at least 12 years after being with him for 30 . For some reason the will had never been discussed, she just ‘presumed’ - they contested it though and although she had to move to sell the house , it was awarded at 50/50 - so she got around £220k as did his children ( split between 2 of them) That’s why I mentioned the 50/50 below - and no, his kids didn’t give a shit that an 81 year old who had saved them a fortune in care fees would be out on her arse- very little in the way of joint cash assets too. Difference was she was a cracking mother and they were not married either. The conclusion was that their was a certain amount of codependency financially and she had enabled their to be more remaining in assets. So if he wants to hang around OP, then I would suggest he gets some family law legal advice ‘on the quiet’ and prepare for getting legal .

I just want to thank the OP for creating the thread and to all the users who have commented.

As I am in the position of the DC set to inherit in this scenario, it has encouraged me to really consider all potential outcomes and to open up some conversations.

I may be wrong, but I think all of these were decided on the particular facts of the particular case which might not apply in the OP's situation.

You've spoken to her but nowhere do you mention if you've spoken to your father. Why not?