AIBU to find being a stay at home mum exhausting?

32 replies

Gmary20 · 22/07/2025 22:06

I have a great life, my husband is kind and caring and earns enough to support the family without me having to work while we have young children. I have a gorgeous, inquisitive and caring 20 month old daughter who I love more than life itself.

But, am I the only one who finds being a stay at home mum completely exhausting? I resort to putting the tv on for my daughter a lot as I just don’t have the energy to be constantly playing with her and she can’t entertain herself for long.

I take her to a play group a few morning a week and we go to the park a few times a week as well, I’m just finding it so exhausting. I kind of dread the monotony of waking up and having to make breakfast again. All I want is a break for a little bit. We have no family near by so we never have any help with childcare.

What confuses me is how people go no screen? If anyone has any advice I would appreciate it because without the telly I would have a toddler attached to my leg crying 12 hours a day and I would never be able to get anything done or have any peace. How did people be stay at home mums with babies and toddler before the Tv was invented?

Please send help, and advice. I’m not complaining I’m just exhausted. Thank you.

OP posts:

Koalaslippers · 22/07/2025 22:23

It is exhausting particularly with a toddler. Don't stress yourself about using the TV to get stuff done.

I found it helped to have vague plans about the day e.g. park, painting, x and y house jobs. If I started the day with no plans at all it made it feel more monotonous. Leaving the house each day even for a little bit helped too.

Young children are lovely but definitely exhausting and repeatative.

Stichintime · 22/07/2025 22:22

Doing the same thing over and over can be monotonous, so try getting out everyday and shake things up a bit. A different park, libraries, soft play, galleries, museums, swimming, cafe etc.

At home try to set up sensory activities, read stories, sing songs with actions, get some chunky pens and large sheets of paper and model mark making. I would also engage her with whatever you're doing, using descriptive language. Get her to 'help' with laundry, sweeping and wiping.
Use any nap times to have some down time.

RandomMess · 22/07/2025 22:19

More toddler groups and meeting for play dates kept me sane. I also found having a few pre-school DC easier because they entertained each other.

Cutleryclaire · 22/07/2025 22:18

I echo the point about nursery. What I find hard at the weekends is seeing all the things that need doing and it distracts me. With the free hours could you do nursery a couple of mornings a week to get everything else done and feel more able to relax into playing?

(Fwiw I work and there’s no way I could be a sahp. I don’t have it in me.)

CsTheDay · 22/07/2025 22:17

It can be quite exhausting and monotonous. I found a daily walk, feeding ducks, going on a bus ride, shopping at the greengrocer to identify fruit and veg, enjoying the activities provided by the library provided a break.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 22/07/2025 22:14

It is exhausting. I was never a SAHM but on weekends, holidays, random days off etc when mine were little what helped was to be out of the house. ALOT. As much as possible. Makes the days go much faster and also tires them out.

A lot of adults find playing imaginative games with kids really hard, and somehow it really draws your attention to all the things you aren’t “getting on with” around the house.

I also think going back to work a couple of days a week if too can, and using a nursery for those days, is a good idea. Nursery is much better for them than screens!

Minecroft · 22/07/2025 22:08

Could you not get a job for day or two a week and put her in nursery? Just for a change?

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