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AIBU?

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Original poster

Snooty Mums leaving DD out

81 replies

Wiseoldbird51 · 22/07/2025 20:44

We are a hardworking respectable family living in a very snooty town. The school Mums are in a group that I’m not a part of and because of this my lovely DD is left out of most social occasions. It is very sad to witness the heartlessness of her so called friends. AIBU in wanting to challenge the parents or should kids be left to experience their own heartbreak. How have others dealt with this!!

OP posts:
NerrSnerr · 22/07/2025 20:56

How old is your daughter and what events are they leaving her out of? Is it just they’re getting together meaning the children are playing at the same time? Are these the only children your child plays with at school?

mindutopia · 22/07/2025 20:54

They are friends and they get together socially with their friends and their children. That’s totally normal. We mostly only hang out with the other parents we’re friends with. I just don’t really like small talk with strangers. I’d rather stick to my friends.

But you can facilitate friendships without being best friends with the parents. Have you invited the children over for a play date? I may not want to socialise with randoms, but I rarely say no to a play date unless there are known safeguarding issues (there are definitely children I won’t let mine socialise with, due to substance abuse or risky behaviour or domestic violence in the home, etc). Short of that, it would be rare for parents to turn down play dates with someone their child is actually close friends with.

TheCosyViewer · 22/07/2025 20:51

What age is your DD ? Do you invite your DD’s friends to your home ? Does your DD play a sport / go to a dance or music class or swimming ? Or some other extra curricular activity ?

How pro-active are you at creating opportunities for your daughter ? Your whole school and neighbourhood can’t all be ‘snooty’.

arcticpandas · 22/07/2025 20:47

It depends on her age. Secondary school mums don't really deal with this. But I can't believe ALL mums are snotty though. Maybe it's you who wish your DD plays with the snooty mums' offsprings? Look around you and I'm sure you will find perfectly normal mums to arrange playdates with.

ChristOlive · 22/07/2025 20:47

Making this about you will end in disaster for your DD.

YouWillFindMeInTheGarden · 22/07/2025 20:46

How is a whole town ‘snooty’?

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