10 year old snubbed at wedding

I wonder if one of them had an adopted child, would they have been left out too because they aren’t blood related. I think it’s totally thoughtless and selfish to leave a child out

I read it as only blood only.

the mil, mils sisters. Mils Children, the sisters children and grandchildren.

Op wasn’t invited herself so sounds like it was blood only.

That’s rubbish, none of the partners are blood relatives. What if she was adopted? You don’t see blood, how can it have anything to do with a photo?

i don’t think this is the same thing at all. This is the woman’s grandchild and grandchild’s sibling but anyway, following your logic, only blood relations should be in photos. No friends, long-standing partners…it’s supposed to be a snapshot of the day and separating siblings is awfully petty and mean spirited.

Whilst it may seem awful, the reality is she isn’t a blood relative therefore it is their choice. I didn’t include my step daughters in my family portrait or vice versa. Also remember, if you split from your dp they wouldn’t see your eldest anymore

No, she can feel what she wants but it’s never acceptable to exclude and be cruel to a 10 year old child.

if your saying blood is the problem then she’s no less part of the family than cousins new wife /husband. There’s no reason she couldn’t be in the family photos.

This was so, so cruel. Regardless of what your MIL and SIL were feeling about biological vs not biological (but still sounds very much like family?) grandchildren, they are ADULTS and should know better than to deliberately cut out a 10 year old all for the sake of a photograph. They should have absolutely included all the children in it. They should feel ashamed of themselves. At 10, you cannot expect a child to rationalise, they will only feel hurt and left out, this goes so deep for children. As the ‘grown ups’ they should have done better. I am so sorry.

That’s mean and I can completely understand why you reacted the way you did.

For peace sake they should have done one with your older child and one without.

Unemotionally it’s nice to have photos of family where you don’t have to worry about an ex boyfriend or ex wife or in this case ex step children, should relationships fail.

We have some lovely whole family photos including what are now very ex partners and it ruins those photos for the person who the ex was with. Our own wedding photo is one used from before quite a few of the elderly relatives died, dh’s sister hates it and fumes because her Ex is in it, she forced him in and now regrets that’s deeply considering the new husband and children.

These situations are very complicated.

I understand why you feel upset that your daughter was excluded.

But - I also appreciate why your MIL might not consider her equally to her own granddaughter, as ultimately, she isn’t.

Thinking about my own ‘step families’, I don’t think I’d expect to be in family photos of theirs. I’m not their niece or cousin or child etc. It is different.

I am unsure about your reaction - this may just be drawing attention to it and teaching your elder daughter she should be upset / feel rejected. Probably better to teach her to brush it off, roll your eyes etc? Difficult to get a ten year old to understand the dynamics.

That's terrible. I have 'step' grandchildren. I will never be their 'real' Grandma but they sure as hell are my Grandchildren. How dare they.

I’m sorry OP 😔😔 that’s fucking awful.

I can’t ever begin to try and understand how grown ass adults can behave like that and think it’s ok.
I’m furious for you 🤬