To quite like being fat?

Are we supposed to know that? I have no idea what my BMI is.

....actually. I'm not even sure what my weight is.

Hasn't she posted her height and weight?

5 '3 and 13 stones?

If OP eats fairly healthily and exercises, but has a naturally broad body shape, she may not be particularly overweight at size 16.

I have exactly the type of body people tend to reference when they try to argue that size 16 isn't big:

• very tall, nearly 6'
• big build - broad shoulders, 9lb childbearing hips, 34F breasts, size UK9 feet
• muscly - I lift heavy weights 3x weekly.

Yet I was overweight at size 16. By BMI, and by visible fat. By the time I was filling my 16 clothes to their limits I'd tipped into obese.

Yeah I don’t think BMI is the be all and end all and it’s certainly flawed but I think if you’re a normal, non-athletic person who is 30+ BMI, then there’s no real way to spin that as being a healthy weight. You’re obese. It sucks, I know. The BMI ranges are really generous - healthy for me spans almost 40lbs of variation, so there’s plenty of leeway. They have a lot of ‘give’ in.

As a former fatty, maybe a fatty again one day because I think once you’ve been obese you will always have to work harder at not being, a lot of stuff like this exactly like is excuses I made for myself. ‘BMI isn’t that accurate anyway, I would look gaunt at 9 stone’ all that stuff.

But I was 34BMI at my heaviest and was hugely overweight. I am now 9 stone, 21BMI, and shockingly do not look gaunt. I could probably lose another half stone and not look anywhere near gaunt. I look back at pictures of myself and feel just really sad and sorry for myself because I didn’t think at the time I was that fat. But now I look at them and I’m genuinely a bit horrified because I look so obviously obese. I think when you’re living it, your perception is warped and you try to protect yourself from it a bit.

Of course it takes your build into account, theres a massive range within each point of a couple of stone.

I can be as heavy as 10 stone 5lb or somethjing like that and as little as the late 7 stones (cant be bothered to look it up). A massive range that take into account people's build, bone structure, how they carry weight etc etc.

“Due to being short”

BMI calculators take in to account height!

You're not wrong about the "BuT wHaT AbOuT BoDyBuilDeRs?" arguments, but then again people with a healthy weight according to the BMI scale are naturally going to be less likely to criticize it!

Looking at this thread title and all the comments, no matter what the opinion, heartens me. We have moved through that nonsensical phase, not so long ago when 'fat' was labelled a dirty word which had to be dressed up in euphemistic terms such as 'curvaceous' 'womanly' 'voluptuous' etc. It gives me hope.

I think BMI is a very crude tool because it doesn't take your build into account.

I am medium height but a very small build. That's not a stealth boast - my mum and dad are both very small builds so it's genetic. I have very narrow shoulders and hips, and not much boobs or bum. I also have a sticky out tummy shape so don't look great in a bikini. As a young woman I once had to go for a medical and was told I was underweight by my BMI. It was quite upsetting as I eat plenty and have never dieted. My mum had the same when she was at school due to just being a very small build.

Conversely I have two friends who are shorter than me (so I guess about 5' 2 or 5' 3) who are clearly both much bigger builds than me. Even when we were all young and skinny, they had much broader shoulders and hips than me - their actual skeleton is wider. Neither are health freaks but they both eat fairly healthily and do exercise. I'd say they are both around a size 14. Due to being short, BMI calculators would probably put them at the top end of normal, if not overweight. But they look healthy and in proportion.

If OP eats fairly healthily and exercises, but has a naturally broad body shape, she may not be particularly overweight at size 16.

BMI is flawed, especially for women (designed on/by/for male bodies)

it would seem only people in the unhealthy BMI zones argue this

Exactly 💯 this. I've got Asian genes and type 2 diabetes is a real risk. 😳 My birth father was Chinese and looked as thin as a reed in photos, both my birth parents were slim but I seem to have inherited a love of food from one of them, so I'm not sure I will be in s healthy BMI range if I was to eat all I liked.

Actually, I am not in a healthy range now, so I do need to lose some weight. During my second pregnancy, I went on a low carb diet to prevent gestational diabetes and lost weight while remaining healthy for the baby. The consultant was totally impressed by how well I controlled my blood sugar, and said it would be great if fewer women with gestational diabetes used insulin and drugs.

I agree that Asian people are more likely to get diabetes, and I'm worried about how much weight I need to avoid putting on. Portion sizes aren't my forte and I love food, so it's a constant battle 😅😆😅

Baffles me how it's not spoken about more... I don't eat much less than the average person paying for injections, but they're fine and healthy, and I need to be in a hospital because I'm starving myself. Apparently...

You suffer from anorexia. How do you know you don’t eat much less than the “average person paying for injections” ? @Agix

"Healthy" is a fairly broad range. I'd tend to use "slim" or "lean" as a description. To me, "thin" suggests a low body mass either at the low end of normal or below that into being underweight.

I find it interesting that the language on threads like this tends to split into a dichotomy of fat/ thin and ignore the middle ground.

25 years ago as a young adult, my BMI was 20 which was natural, healthy and proportionate for my age and build. In my mid-40s, I don't want to go back down there again. My body is hormonally different. It's been changed by pregnancy/ birth. It's been changed by exercise and building muscle to hopefully maximise my health potential in older life.

I'm not going to waste middle-age chasing "thin". It's nothing but frustration and isn't healthy.

Neither do I want to be "fat". There's the expense of clothes and physical discomfort in the way I move. I had heavy pregnancies and at 5'2" went from 9st2 to 13st (via 8.5st via nausea). It was awful. I lost muscle mass in the nausea stage when I was too queasy to eat and too exhausted to move, and by the time I emerged from that phase SPD kicked in. I had a proportionately large baby, a lot of fluid and of the 4.5st gained, I was left with 2st of "me" weight a couple of weeks after the birth. It was a horrible, painful experience. By the time I hit 13st in the final week, I couldn't use the sofa if there was no one in the house to pull me off it! I appreciate that that's a different biological process to gradually building up to that weight through fat gain, but would never opt to put my body through the stress of being that weight again. (Medical complications are a different matter.)

The middle ground is broad. Being short, it's less generous than it is for taller people, but I can still with care, maintain a fairly "normal" lifestyle. I eat a "normal" range of foods with managed portions but there are times for accepting and declining cake/ alcohol/ sweet drinks etc. I can't consume everything freely, but neither do I have to decline all "treats". I don't spend my life muttering "I really shouldn't" before tucking into a lettuce leaf. It has to be more managed than in my youth, but it doesn't constrain my life either. Exercise I do for the physical and emotional feel-good factor now and investment into the future.

Other peoples' bodies are their own business. They have their own biology, medical and lifestyle issues. But biologically the closer to "healthy" range the better. That doesn't mean everyone sitting neatly between 20-25 though.

Yep. I tip into pre-diabetes at a BMI of 24-25. Asians don't do well with even slight fat.
At the end of the day everyone has to do what suits them, I guess. Nothing to do with society. Everything to do with health.

I am of Asian extraction. We have lower BMI ranges because of the cardiovascular risk of us having belly fat. It’s not good to be fat in India. It’s damn dangerous.

The idea that everyone who isn't obese spends their whole life obsessing over their weight is ridiculous 🙄

I had to absolutely harangue my husband to admit he prefers me not fat. If he puts on a few pounds, I’ll point it out. It’s something we’ve always promised each other we’d do, yet he remained schtum so as not to upset me.

He’s the best person I know, the best person anyone I know knows. Not remotely a dick nor a disappointment.

I’d not like it if he got fat. Doesn’t mean I’d stop loving him.

Try as you might you can't defend being obese.

Nice try though,

There is more to health and wellbeing than weight. It’s worth bearing in mind that-
— BMI is flawed, especially for women (designed on/by/for male bodies)
— loneliness has been said to have a similar negative effect on health as smoking
— being joyful is impossible when you’re anxious or worried/stressed, and without joy is life even worth it?
— we are all going to die, some of us before we’re ready. While we can take steps to be as well as we can, there is a balance to be struck between physical and mental optimal health.

It seems to me that @Flumpflimpo is finding some joy, is moving her body and feels well in it. Surely that’s what’s important?

People feel threatened when you say you're happy being fat. Their whole self worth revolves around being thin, and they put the majority of their time and effort into staying that way, so when you say you're happy being fat you make them confront that they're wasting their lives on chasing and keeping this ideal... When they don't have to. But they're too thin obsessed to put that mindset in the backseat for a second.

What an incredibly silly thing to say.

Are you fat?

Please stop thin-shaming. That's unacceptable.

And the opposite of obese is NOT thin.
It's a healthy weight.

I don't know anyone a healthy weight who obsesses.
They enjoy cooking healthy food, enjoy exercise.

You think you're speaking for people who are a healthy weight?
Think again.

Just read this
I see what you mean
as I say, if this is what “happy” looks like - no thanks!

Really, theres often threads on here about women feeling they dont find their OH attractive anymore due to him putting on weight and letting themselves go. Its not unusual and what you like you like, you cant help what you like.

Yes, IIRC they were also confounded by the fact that cancer patients who are about to die tend to lose a large amount of weight, so cause and effect is reversed by people who cite those studies.

People in the overweight category apparently are more at risk of diseases... But have better longetivity? Lol.

This isn't true. The stats were wrong because they included heavy smokers who are frequently slim but unhealthy and die young.

This is a brilliant post, lots to think about!