Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To quite like being fat?

487 replies

Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 17:33

There was one time that i was 9 stone. This year i am the heaviest i have ever been.

Every week for that last year i have been thinking that i must lose weight, and i have been trying every diet , and thinking about food all the time.

I was so stressed from it all that i decided to give myself and not think about dieting for one month.

I was just thinking this month, I quite emjoy being fat. Im not morbidly obese, i am fat.

I feel nice and warm and cozy

When i was thin, i rememember feeling cold and having low energy a lot.

Has anyone else felt the same?

OP posts:
DollydaydreamTheThird · 22/07/2025 19:07

Millennialpause · 22/07/2025 18:29

I love never being hungry and rarely being hit on by creepy men or wolf whistled at. I lost a few pounds recently, and felt the male gaze returning. No thanks!

This has happened to me. I lost a few stone through illness. This is obviously an acceptable weight now as I've noticed a lot more male interest and I'm not exactly a stunner. 🙄

everythingsnotmadeofgold · 22/07/2025 19:07

LessOfThis · 22/07/2025 19:06

Why?

Show quote history

Because it makes a huge difference. If someone is 5 foot 9 and a size 16 and someone is 5 foot 2 and a size 16.

LessOfThis · 22/07/2025 19:06

everythingsnotmadeofgold · 22/07/2025 19:03

What height are you?

Show quote history

Why?

EatMoreChocolate44 · 22/07/2025 19:05

Good for you OP! A refreshing attitude.

CinnamonJellyBeans · 22/07/2025 19:04

I don't know how old you are, but bear in mind that you may well be working until you are > 60 years old.

You will find that once you reach middle age/menopause, your body's ability to work efficiently with excess weight will be really compromised and your feet, knees and hips will not be able to bear it. You only need to people-watch a high street for five minutes to see overweight middle-aged people walking gingerly/unsteady gait/sticks/hobbling. By the time you reach this age, you may find the NHS has run out of plastic knees and the government has run out of disability/mobility benefits. You could be setting yourself up for misery or poverty as your ability to work will be curtailed, whilst still having many years before your pensions kick in.

You need to find a compromise between enjoying feeling substantial and future-proofing your body by staying within sensible weight limits.

KateMiskin · 22/07/2025 19:04

soupyspoon · 22/07/2025 18:57

Havent they got quite a big obesity problem in India, including quite fat children? I think the authorities are quite concerned about it.

What is the purpose of this thread OP?

Show quote history

I am of Indian origin. They don't have a big obesity problem. They have a big diabetes problem because Indians tend to accumulate weight in their tummies. Like me. My entire family are slim or mildly pudgy diabetics.

AntiquePenguin · 22/07/2025 19:04

Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 19:00

For fuck sake. The nastiness on here is unrel

I am happy with my weight.

However i knew that poster was asking me my weight, specificlly to be nasty to me.

If i wasnt fat enough, she would have sneered at me about that, that i was faking being fat. If i was too fat she would have said that i was glorifying being fat

So no i dont have to answer a question that is going to lead to abuse, from an already unkind poster.

Show quote history

You have no basis whatsoever to assume I was going to abuse you about your weight.

everythingsnotmadeofgold · 22/07/2025 19:03

LessOfThis · 22/07/2025 19:02

I have a bmi of 26 and wear a size 16….

Anyway, by MN standards I’d be hideously overweight, but I get plenty of exercise, I swim, I run, I walk. And I eat well. So good for you op!

if you’re happy whose to tell you otherwise!

Show quote history

What height are you?

Original poster
Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 19:02

MaidOfSteel · 22/07/2025 19:01

I knew your post would bring out the self-righteous nasties, but I’m just happy that you are feeling content, OP. Good for you!

Thank you!

OP posts:
Spaglasagneaise · 22/07/2025 19:02

IShouldNotCoco · 22/07/2025 18:31

For me I hate not being slim. It makes me miserable. I have a very small frame and put weight on depressingly easily. If I’m slim feel more confident. I am generally considered to be good looking and become invisible if I’m overweight. Though, the flip side is that women are much nicer to me.

I really think each to their own though.

what a shallow post

LessOfThis · 22/07/2025 19:02

Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 18:22

I checked the bmi.

I have a bmi of 32 . I am obese class 1 according to the bmi.

Im fitting into size 16 in clothes

I have a bmi of 26 and wear a size 16….

Anyway, by MN standards I’d be hideously overweight, but I get plenty of exercise, I swim, I run, I walk. And I eat well. So good for you op!

if you’re happy whose to tell you otherwise!

Luckyingame · 22/07/2025 19:01

Ok, everyone to their own.

I would hate myself, but that would be down to the unfortunate "upbringing" my generation suffered in the 80s and 90s, in a Communist country.

Original poster
Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 19:01

PolyVagalNerve · 22/07/2025 18:56

Hey 👋
it’s good to hear you have a better relationship with food, eating and your body now than when you were slimmer,
being cold and tired suggests you were undereating and too low in weight for your body to cope
well done u for getting to a healthier place

Thank you.

OP posts:
SpinachSpinachMoreSpinach · 22/07/2025 19:01

Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 17:52

I am just fed up of the constant cycle of dieting and failing

I am going to be fat and happy for the rest of the summer.

Then maybe i will try again in september.

Show quote history

Don’t diet.

eat a healthy Mediterranean diet. You know, “eat food, not too much, mostly plants”
and exercise., both cardio and weight training.

You don’t want to be fat for too long. There are serious long- term issues associated with being overweight, especially diabetes and all its complications, as well as osteoarthritis and other joint disorders.

MaidOfSteel · 22/07/2025 19:01

I knew your post would bring out the self-righteous nasties, but I’m just happy that you are feeling content, OP. Good for you!

Muffsies · 22/07/2025 19:00

everythingsnotmadeofgold · 22/07/2025 18:47

Well the best thing to do is not care what society says and I am with you on that but just be careful you don't give yourself health problems further on down the line.

Show quote history

She already said she's going to do something about it when she's ready, she's just not going to ruin her mental health about it in the meantime. Sounds sensible to me, that is doing what's right for herself, not society.

Original poster
Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 19:00

everythingsnotmadeofgold · 22/07/2025 18:54

Seems strange you feel upset that someone asked your weight when you are so happy being obese.

Show quote history

For fuck sake. The nastiness on here is unrel

I am happy with my weight.

However i knew that poster was asking me my weight, specificlly to be nasty to me.

If i wasnt fat enough, she would have sneered at me about that, that i was faking being fat. If i was too fat she would have said that i was glorifying being fat

So no i dont have to answer a question that is going to lead to abuse, from an already unkind poster.

OP posts:
HideousKinky · 22/07/2025 18:58

There was a period in my life when I was feeling very low and I was content being fat because it made me feel protected - quite literally, a barrier between me and the outside world. Whenever I lost weight I felt uneasy and would end up putting it back on, quite deliberately really.

When I felt much happier this ended, I lost 10kg and it stayed that way.

You should do what feels comfortable for you OP

soupyspoon · 22/07/2025 18:57

Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 18:40

I am making perfect sense.

I am saying that i feel mentally and physically great being fat.

However i also feel the severe western society pressure to be thin. Which is why i will start a diet again in september.

Pressure to be thin is only in our culture. Ive been to India. In India, people are admired for bing fat.

I told them that people are always trying to be thin in my culture. They said "what, people do that out of choice?"
Because to them: thinness is a sign of lack of food and sickness.

Show quote history

Havent they got quite a big obesity problem in India, including quite fat children? I think the authorities are quite concerned about it.

What is the purpose of this thread OP?

PopeJoan2 · 22/07/2025 18:56

Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 17:52

I am just fed up of the constant cycle of dieting and failing

I am going to be fat and happy for the rest of the summer.

Then maybe i will try again in september.

Show quote history

Good idea. Just be careful that you don’t end up getting even heavier as you might be at quite a healthy weight for you right now but a couple of stones heavier may not feel quite as cosy. It doesn’t take much to keep gaining.

PolyVagalNerve · 22/07/2025 18:56

Hey 👋
it’s good to hear you have a better relationship with food, eating and your body now than when you were slimmer,
being cold and tired suggests you were undereating and too low in weight for your body to cope
well done u for getting to a healthier place

AntiquePenguin · 22/07/2025 18:56

Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 18:51

I disagree.

You are not entitled to know anyone's weight.

Especially as youb were asking me with a view to "catching me out" in some way

I felt upset and uncomfortable when you asked me.

Edited
Show quote history

I'm not sure why you would post an AIBU thread about whether you are being unreasonable to be happy about 'being fat' - which is quite an inflammatory way of putting it - and not expect to be asked questions,

MyUmberSeal · 22/07/2025 18:55

cupfinalchaos · 22/07/2025 18:52

I’ve never known anyone on their deathbed who said “I wish I was thinner!”

Maybe not, but I work in a funeral home and I know for a fact that plenty of people die before their time, because they are massively overweight.

The OP isn’t massively overweight, but nevertheless, there is an element of ‘thou doth protest too much’ from the OP.

LadyKenya · 22/07/2025 18:55

KateMiskin · 22/07/2025 18:49

Because of Western society.

Show quote history

But it is to the detriment of the OP, who says that she feels cold all the time thinner. Why succumb to that type of pressure, to only feel ill all the time, how is that any good? She is either happy as she is, or unhappy, and cold being thin.

Original poster
Flumpflimpo · 22/07/2025 18:54

soupyspoon · 22/07/2025 18:53

Why do you want to lose weight in September then?

Its ok to say you want to stay the same and you're happy

It also depends on how overweight you are, you say 'the heaviest Ive ever been', well that could be anything over 9 stone then, you might not be very big at all in which case your health is fine probably

I can tell you now that the weight creeps up and up and up and as you get older, its no fun.

Show quote history

I have answered the first question five times!

Read the thread.

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread