Sister's wedding and no children invited

Exactly. It would be much more weird for parents not to have reservations about this.

You sound quite resentful and angry. I imagine there are personal reasons behind that.

I don't know about you, but all the weeding I've been to there was a photographer to capture beautiful moments of the day, including all guests. If a wedding is just for the bride/groom, bridesmaids/groomsman, don't invite other people and make them spend their hard earned money.
Just my view!

Why are brides so entitled that they throw a strop because a breastfeeding mother can't attend a child free wedding?

It cuts both ways.

I think some posters were never children ;-)

I find this very rude! And if I ever get such an invitation like that, I won't be attending.

I'm not leaving my young children being looked after by other people like that. Particularly if I have to find and finance a stranger to look after them.

A marriage is about forming a family and weddings that exclude children, just show those people aren't ready to be a family.

I recently attended a family wedding and there was lots of children in there. Some from family, some from friends and it was beautiful!

According to some on this thread though it’s selfish to not go to be prepared to give up three days for something that most people manage in a day.

I still think very fondly of a wedding I went to as a plus one (unmarried), the groom's brother had severe learning disabilities but a special interest in my professional job. I happily talked about bus timetables and we both looked all radiant in the photos. Sometimes it just works out.
I did later get married and it's lovely seeing in the photos, people on deaths door and one particular child who sadly was never going to make old bones.

A friend of mine was getting married and refused children I simply couldn't go no childcare I never have childcare or support she knew this and that was that I didn't go.

Then you don’t attend the wedding

I know this is a rather delicate situation that could turn out like a family rift if not handled carefully. I understand both sides but if it were me I would say that, as much as I am pleased for her and wish her a long and happy marriage I can't possibly leave my children with anyone, being as young as the are. I hope you have a wonderful 3 days.
If she takes offense then it won't be anything you have said or done it will be a decision made because of her wishes.

her decision but your choice. It would be a hard pass from me.

Its actually not that clear what op is suggesting. She has said the venue won't have children overnight, so I was assuming she felt taking them for the three days wasn't an option anyway.

I think wanting them there for the photos is a bit unreasonable: its the bride's day for photos, I can grant her that! 😄

It was your decision to breastfeed until 2. That's fine, but no one else needs to cater for it. You made the decision, you make the sacrifices - calling someone ridiculous for wanting something different is very arrogant.

they are not "banned" for a start, they are just not invited!

Why should they be invited in the first place? Why are parents so entitled they think the world should revolve around their kids?

I can't see that from OPs posts? It's her assumption they expect her there for 3 days. And if anything it's OP that wants to go for 3 days and is expecting her children to attend so she can do that.

Is OP exclusively breastfeeding or could the children be left with DHs parents for example?

If ebf It's a very simple conversation that needs to be had.

"Dsis I'd love to come for the full 3 days, but as you can imagine I can't get childcare for that long with baby needing his feeds. This leaves two options, bring kids and I can come for the full 3 days, or I can leave them for the day so I'm there for the wedding day, what suits you best?"

If not ebf and grandparents are available and willing, then OP can attend. If she doesn't want to do so, that's fine, but she needs to own that as her choice.

I reckon there is huge overlap between those groups. They probably have their engagement video plastered on social media too.

Yeah I don't see how she can fulfil that role either. The sister is trying to write the baby out of the picture when the baby is very much in op's picture.

@BigSister1991 I think that you may need to suggest that she chooses a different MOH If you’re rushing off to bf, I don’t see how you can do it tbh.

I think some brides think its super chic and sophisticated to throw a days-long event (with lots of instructions that drop out of the invitation as extra pages; or a website you need to peruse to find out what is expected of you and when).

I think its self-indulgent and actually slightly crass.

I do realise there can be a cultural element, which is different - but those weddings tend to be inclusive of all family, which changes the logistics a lot.

@randomlemonsheep @ThatRubyMoose

If the OP is breastfeeding the baby, she’ll literally be the baby’s food source! She’ll need to be available to feed the baby every few hours, there’s no choice in that.

I think you’ll have to do what others have suggested, perhaps have your DH and children stay overnight locally somewhere and just attend the ceremony. It’s going to be awkward meeting up for feeds but what else can you do. Unless your baby will take a bottle and you pump? There’s absolutely no guarantee that this will work though as many babies refuse bottles.

Does your sister not know that bf literally means that the baby needs to be with their mother to eat?!

Yes, I agree. It's ridiculous the expectations some couples put on guests.

It reminds me of that song from The Greatest Showman: "Never, never, never, never enooooough."

For a mother with young children to attend for the actual ceremony and that same day should be more than sufficient.

I totally agree with you. Sorry for the misquote.

Also, its not actually just babysitting that guests need to organise. Its pets that need feeding, gardens that need watering ... I don't know when brides started to get so needy.