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Original poster

Sister's wedding and no children invited

713 replies

BigSister1991 · 21/07/2025 14:15

My younger sister is getting married next year and no children (including family children) are invited to any of the wedding celebrations. We will have two children by then (aged 2.5 and 6 months). They are the only children in the family.

The wedding is 2 hours drive from our home and over 3 days - starting on Friday and ending on Sunday.

Our blood family only consists of my Mum and Sister and so I'm disappointed that my Sister would not want her nephew/niece there or want to include them in the day (and that there won't be any photos of them there). I work full time and weekends with my children are important to me and so I'm sad to have to spend 2 days away from them.

The expectation from my Mum and Sister is that me and my husband attend the wedding without our children without complaint and sort and pay for any childcare arrangements that are required.

OP posts:
BundleBoogie · 21/07/2025 14:21

I don’t know what’s happened to weddings these days - I understand not inviting general guests children as it can bump the numbers
significantly but why does she not regard her niece and nephew as family that would automatically be invited?

I’d be tempted to stand my ground, esp as your kids are so young and the wedding is so long. Maybe you could go to the ceremony itself and dh can amuse the kids for an hour, then you all go by and do something nice together?

Dueindecemberr · 21/07/2025 14:20

DH’s sister got married a couple of years ago and said no children. We had 2 x 3 year olds and a baby at the time. None of us went to the wedding.

Hedgedone · 21/07/2025 14:20

Go to the actual wedding yourself for the day, drive home after the meal.
Leave husband with the children.

The cheek of both of them to expect anything of the sort.

caringcarer · 21/07/2025 14:20

bellamorgan · 21/07/2025 14:17

I wouldn’t be going family clearly isn’t that important to your sister if out of four biological family members 2 are refused entry and one’s only 6 months old a baby in arms.

This. Sorry dearest sister but I don't have childcare I feel comfortable leaving my DC with. I hope you have a lovely day.

similarminimer · 21/07/2025 14:19

Could you and your husband take the children and tag team with them for the weekend?

Gymmum82 · 21/07/2025 14:19

I would just say no sorry I won’t be able to attend. It’s a big ask of anyone to look after such a young baby and a toddler for 3 days. She doesn’t want kids there, fine. But she has to accept that means their parents won’t be there either

SixteenClovesOfGarlic · 21/07/2025 14:19

They are free to have their own expectations, and a childfree wedding, it's fine.
You can choose if you want to obey their expectations, or decline the invitation. Do what suits you.

Octonaut4Life · 21/07/2025 14:18

There's no chance I would have left a six month old baby with anyone else for a whole weekend, even a few hours would be a big ask. It's not a reasonable expectation and it's totally legitimate for you to explain that unfortunately you're not able to attend in that case.

BernardButlersBra · 21/07/2025 14:18

Her wedding = her rules. Her and the groom are paying for it and organising so they are allowed to have it their way. If you don't go because of lack of childcare then that's the risk they take but l assume they've given plenty of notice?

FionnulaTheCooler · 21/07/2025 14:18

Do you really have to go for 3 days? I'd make an effort to go to the ceremony/reception and then go home after that, you don't even have to leave your children overnight if it's only 2 hours drive away.

bellamorgan · 21/07/2025 14:17

I wouldn’t be going family clearly isn’t that important to your sister if out of four biological family members 2 are refused entry and one’s only 6 months old a baby in arms.

needtostopnamechanging · 21/07/2025 14:17

They can expect
yoy can say no thank you

it will likely be a difficult time for your young family - toddler and new born I wouldn’t want to commit to leaving them

sweetpickle2 · 21/07/2025 14:17

She's not unreasonable to not have children at her wedding, and you're not unreasonable to say you won't be able to attend.

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