Processed meat or no meat at all?

Chicken and fish ARE meat. They don't grow from the ground. They will be fine without it and processed meat is poison.

Find a good butcher, get their own sausages, always better quality and less crap than supermarket bought. Things like bacon, you can get the nitrate/nitrite free ones where they cure things like sugar. Try to make your own selection like chicken nuggets, breaded goujons…quick and easy and you know what’s going in to them…always try to make your own if possible as less crap 🤷🏻‍♀️

You make make homemade nuggets a bit more like the ultra processed sort by whizzing up the chicken in a processor with some soft breadcrumbs, an egg, seasoning and herbs. Then coat in flour/egg/panko and shallow fry. These have a crunchy outside and soft inside, like the processed kind, but without the crap.

This may sound stupid but here goes. I’m assuming your homemade nuggets are chunks of chicken that are breaded? Have you tried putting the the chicken in a food processor and then forming them into nuggets more similar to commercially made ones? Might take some experimenting to get the right consistency but it may work.

I feel your pain!

I have a fussy 9 y/o who only really eats sausages. I only buy Finnebrogue Naked Sausages for her as they are nitrite free so mitigates some of the health hazard associated with bangers

I had a son that was medically underweight as a child. The paediatrician and dietitian said “fed is best “. If the only thing he will eat is pizza, give him pizza. I’ve given him donuts for breakfast, then I started to bake cheesecakes for breakfast (protein)

in short processed meat is better than no meat.

The haddock goujons in Waitrose are nice too. Also not ultra processed. Homemade meatballs and burgers also fine.

The chicken tenders in m&s and Morrisons are not ultra processed....just buy the ones with all real ingredients. It's usually the plain ones. The Yuka app is really good to identify what additives are in food, it does vary a lot by shop / item.. Good quality handmade sausages from a butcher also aren't ultra processed. If they are picky, they are better off with some meat. Do they eat mince?

Also have to think about iron intake, because I’m betting they don’t like green leafy veg, so meat may be their main source.

Will they eat mince? Spag bol with hidden veggies. Fish fingers, expensive now for quality but can often be found on offer.

How is their dairy intake - milk, yoghurt, cheese...

Do they like baked beans (neither of mine did grrr!) but cheesy beans on toast is healthier than a cheap sausage.

Protein enhanced pizza bases... Make your own pizza.

My son didn't eat anything that wasn't processed or beige, this was late 90s so we didn't have many options!
He did love a chicken roast dinner though - wouldn't touch the veg. Still doesn't, but it's very quick and easy to knock up a chicken breast roast dinner if they like their gravy.

Daughter would have lived on veg and fruit if she could - broccoli especially!

You can get good quality sausages and ham (think 99% chicken) in Polish shops. They are delicious, too. Go and look around. Poles don't seem to die of bowel cancer on regular basis. It's probably all the cheap filler stuff in those products in the UK/US (I check it sometimes and it's usually only 50-60% meat and the rest are fillers) that kills us here.

Two of our children have had significant issues around food texture so I totally get what you say. DD is also autistic which can have a real impact on needing to eat familiar foods with consistent flavour and texture.
The good news for us has been both of them have widened their palate and with maturity are better prepared to try new foods and eat a much wider range of things. The pulse DD will happily eat are red lentils cooked as a dahl as the texture is smooth and she likes those flavours.
We found it shifted at high school and again once they cooked more for themselves. DSD eats food we would never imagined she would eat as a child.

Have you tried homemade chicken nuggets? If you make them in batches and freeze them they'll at least be better than processed.

Aim for healthier versions

But don't worry about it.

To add, as a couple of other posters have touched on, the specific concerns with processed meat are nitrites and nitrates as carcinogens - which are mostly found in cured processed meats like bacon, ham and charcuterie, in reconstituted meat products, and in some hot dogs. Things like fresh sausages, burgers, and chicken nuggets, whilst often less than ideal because they’re usually high in saturated fat, don’t usually contain these preservatives.

Yes I just wanted clarity on that as I wasn't sure.

I realised your username later. It made me smile.
Velvetising changes the meat texture. The longer you "marinate" it, the more denatured the protein. So you could experiment with a range of times. What might be too much for some might be exactly what a kid with sensory issues needs. Who knows. You can use cornstarch or bicarb.
All the best

As others have said
1 they don't need meat if they have other protein sources. The processed meat can then occasionally supplement
2 choose low additives as low as you can go

It might be more helpful if you post a sample week's diet then people can help you think of options s as well as adequacy of protein

Ultimately you are feeding your kid the best you can under tough circumstances. Kudos to you

Don't forget trying velvetising. And it could also be associations. So velvetise thin slices and cook them. Pack them like in a supermarket (you can use ziplocks) . Then let dc only see you take them from a pack not cook them and see if that does the tricks.

As parents we are called to be many things including tricksters and magicians

I’d pick your battles. In every almost certain likelihood, they aren’t going to be this way forever: as they get older their tastes will broaden, they’ll be exposed to new foods through their peers, the fussiness will drop away. I don’t know any adults who now only eat nuggets and baked beans, even if that’s all they’d eat as children. A few years of chicken nuggets and sausages, because being fed is better than not being fed, is not a tragedy in the grand scheme of things. Just check the ingredients, buy the best quality / highest meat content / least additive versions you can that they’ll accept.

Good quality sausages are fine. Have you tried making nuggets from turkey mince?

Finnebrogue does naked ham and sausages. Not additives free but nitrite free