DTD - All ticked off - HIGH FIVE!!!!

This too.

I am so sorry that you had/have to put up with those bastards.

You should not feel ashamed for how you feel. However, if you feel pain please ask your partner to stop. You deserve better.

May I gently suggest that you try and get some counselling/therapy for the trauma you experienced because of those family members. I am guessing that it doesn’t just affect your sex life.

This seems sad. Not because you 'should' be enjoying sex but because it seems a shame for prior abuse to get in the way of you receiving pleasure. Would you consider seeing a psychosexual counsellor? You might unravel what is getting in the way.

Not had sex for over 10 years. Still have a loving happy marriage so no, sex is not essential to a happy marriage and husband!

I get this so hard-I'm 47 and have namechanged
I've never felt anything during sex
First boyfriend (who treated me like shit) at 14,lost the big v at 17
I feel nothing at all,never had an orgsam,I don't feel turned on just numb
Dp is amazing,all he wants is for me to enjoy myself in bed (and out of it,he's the perfect partner,the dream man in many ways)
It's me-im dead when it comes to sex,I feel nothing-I've never felt randy in my life
I now find it can hurt when he's banging away and it feels like he's hitting my cervix (he'd stop in a heartbeat if I said it was hurting)
I don't hate sex,I just feel nothing around it,if we never did it again,I'd be so happy
As it is,at least twice a week I'm thinking 'thank fuck that's over for now'

I know a lot stems from my family who are evil,narcissistic and nasty bastards who tell anyone who will listen that I'm obsessed with sex and will shag anything that wears trousers,which led to a string of awful relationships,which in turn knocked me sideways but if I never had to have sex again,I'd be so happy

As it is,I plaster on a smile and fake it but will never make it

I feel so ashamed to admit this and this is the only time I have

I haven't had sex in years and am unlikely to. I'd love it as I miss it. Know you're being light hearted and it sounds like you've got a lot on but I'm guessing you wouldn't really want to be me. Not really.

It’s why I decided to not have any more relationships. I don’t miss it all in real
life. But when I see my celebrity ‘crush’ on tv I feel I could happily never get out of bed 😁

She’d probably think fair dues.

I don't feel like this. Of course there are days when I'm really tired. On those days I prefer to just get my vibrator out because it's quicker, but if he starts touching me and it leads to sex, I always end up enjoying it. I need physical connection to maintain emotional connection with my husband. Cuddling and strokes can do it, but orgasming together is something else. I think if you are both interested in each other sexually then the peaks and dips in libido are just something you work through together. I couldn't imagine feeling this way all the time and I would hate to not enjoy sex because it gives me such joy.

Can in all honesty imagine DW doing exactly that, a yes that’s that over with for at least another month thought

Jesus Christ imaging living like this is depressing.

And yeah I’m menopausal.

She probably wouldn't know...

Right. Firstly, you could talk to your doctor, and don't be embarrassed, they deal with this stuff a lot. If you don't want to, there is a company called Yes. They make lots of products, I use Yes VM a couple of times a week as a general internal moisturiser (use a panty liner as it dribbles a bit!) and Yes WB as a lube during sex. Both available easily online, or, if you pluck up the courage to go to your GP, they are both available on prescription. I find them much better and non-irritating than KY or Durex lubes. I also understand that pure food-grade coconut oil is good, but haven't tried it personally.

No DH here, but I agree with this really.

I know what you mean. I've never been into sex, I think I might be asexual but I was happy to do it once a week or so because I love DH and it's still a bonding thing between us. It's been less since we've started sleeping in separate beds due to snoring but he seems to be OK with it and I am.

I'd be gutted if DH felt this way about having sex with me.

I just use the durex 'feel' lube. Tesco sell it, it's often on club card price around £5. I've found some of the other ones too medical, they remind me of an internal/smear.

Yet, a lot of post menopause women are saying exactly the same. It's a complex issue. There isn't a senario comparable to having sex. Our bodies change throughout our life and we make the best of it.
I can remember commenting on the change of diet needed, for many women during the thick of menopause. A lot of posters tried to shut us down. Yet none of them were even in the start of Peri. Women (and men) should be able to discuss this. It's you who sounds like a child.

We've been married 40+ years and our sex life is better than ever. Im a plus size body but my husband loves it anyway, he's a bit more wrinkly but I still see him as perfect! We have sex 4 or 5 times a week and he's a very giving lover!! So no i don't agree with you.......

Same here, who can be arsed

You know what, I’ve been thinking of this and if my DH did that, with the ‘joking toe tone’ I read the op with I’d probably laugh along with him.

YABU to call it DTD. It’s sex.