Not adding second wife to the deeds of our new house

The DH will have to make some provision for his wife in a will that is secure enough not to be contested, but he is perfectly entitled to leave the majority of his assets to his children, even if that means the wife has to move out of her home. At least, that’s the advice I received from a solicitor.

So she wants the house to give it to her own children and her husband’s children should miss out?

Even though she has contributed nothing to the house whatsoever?

CFery…

Although if they’re married it doesn’t go straight to his kids, it would go to her anyway.

Not if her DH writes his will specifically to leave the house to his DC. If there's no will, then yes.

A friend is in this situation: , her DH doesn't want to add her to the deeds as he wants the house to go directly to his children. She is upset, which I can understand, although she won't be contributing to the purchase or running of house.

If she's not contributing to the purchase or running of the house.

Completely unreasonable to expect to be on the deeds or inherit when her DH dies. Although he will have to specify in his will that the house goes to his DC.

She might be upset about losing her place of living on her DH's death - yes, that's reasonable to be upset. But she's a grown up and presumably has her own property or can plan to acquire one, so she has somewhere to move to, given that she'll have no accommodation expenses!

It sounds like a bad situation from both sides if married.
If he dies - she becomes homeless.
If they divorce - she has a claim on the asset he wanted to protect.
If either end up in a care home it may have to be sold to pay for their care.

No one seems to have got legal advice.
If not married then he is protecting his assets and she needs to think about her own security.

All assuming it’s in the UK (definitely England)

Your friend is the one being unreasonable. She’s not contributing to the purchase or running of the house, so he’s doing the right thing not adding her to the deeds. Hopefully he has it written in his will that the house is yours go to his children. She sounds a money grabber.

That depends on
1- what their arrangement is finance wise. Fully joint account? Paying according to their wage or 50/50 regardless? And who will be paying for the house/repairs and upkeep etc….
2- what does he say re the fact she’d become homeless on the day he dies
3- she actually has the possibility to put money aside to get her own house/they decide to buy somethimg else for her etc…..

Basically, he decided to get married but seem to be want his cake and eat it. Ie I want to share everything but not what I see as my inheritance regardless on the impact on my wife
i think that a shit view of marriage personally. If he wanted to protect the inheritance, he shouldn’t have got married.

I meant I don’t see a point if you have children, and no joint children. You can still be in a relationship, you don’t need to get married because it doesn’t benefit his kids in any way. That’s his priority. And he is placing his priority of his kids first which I fully agree with. why isn’t she doing the same?

Tbf aren’t your friends kids going to inherit off their father ? So why should they potentially inherit twice off their dad and stepdad while the husbands own kids only get what their dad is leaving them ?

It depends on her financial situation. He could put in his will that she has a life interest in the house, but that on her death it goes to the children. If, under his current will, upon his death, she will be homeless and destitute, then it is very unreasonable.

He shouldn’t have married her if he feels like this because if it ends up being a long marriage (about 10yrs) she’ll have rights.

Your friend needs to save the money that she would have spent on a mortgage/rent so that if the worst happened, she’d be ok. Are there assets like savings or life insurance policy where she is the beneficiary?

You don’t see the point in people getting married again, in later life, life doesn’t stay the same people move on, good for them.And no not all assets should go to his children, when you’re married, legally won’t she be entitled to half.

But WHY would she think she would be entitled to an asset she hasn’t contributed to at all? Neither by finances nor unpaid role. Unless there’s something like her looking after his kids going on, then it’s really money grabbing of her. Why has she not/can she not contribute to her own assets?

I'm certainly not an expert (and I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong), but looking to the future, if he goes into a care home for some reason and the house isn't shared, I think the house will have to be sold to cover the costs. Then she would be homeless and his kids might end up with nothing as well?

There are so many variables.
I'm middle aged, late 50s. In my circle there are people that are widowed. They would see it as entirely appropriate to keep assets separate and make a will to ensure that assets built up by them and their deceased spouse are ring fenced for those kids. In reality marraige is only sensible if both parties have similar value assets.
I also have a friend who shared everything with her new spouse and they have written wills leaving it between their children from previous relationships, 1 from his, 3 from hers. But that involves a fairly chunky mortgage so they will build joint assets together.

Is she planning to save or invest the money she would otherwise be spending on housing? Sounds like a good deal to me. No housing costs, stick it in investments or pension depending on her age.

I think your friend is being a little unreasonable, if she hasn't contributed anything to the house. How old are she and her DH and their respective children? Does she have any assets of her own?

Her new DH could offer her some protection in the event of his death through taking out a life insurance policy, or writing his will to leave the house to his children but allow her to continue living it for a period after his death.

In these situations is often a lifetime interest in the will so the remaining spouse can stay there after the first one diesbut the house belongs to the kids of the original owner

also you say "running of house" but she will be looking after the children, not just hers also his children when they are visiting (unless they live 100% there then she will be looking after them 24/7).

if he dies she will be homeless, why her husband doesn't care about that?

He’s right. His assets should go to his kids. I don’t even see the point of people getting married in this situation either. Your responsibilities to your kids rests on you. He’s taking care of his kids, and you should do the same

Why doesn't your friend buy another property in her own name that she can let out and then move into if the situation ever arrives that he predeceases her. This gives her a home to move into or to leave to her children.

What assets does she have that she brings to their marriage. Sole assets remain sole assets and can willed where they want to be. It's only in divorce that they may considered in terms of a financial settlement including properties in sole names.

Has he made other financial provision for her perhaps in the event of his death such as life assurance?

It's her husband. I would be upset. Hes at ease because his biological kids will be taken care off. He's not concerned about hers if he's not thinking of a plan for that. I know they're her kids but they are married and it shows that it's not a problem for him if they're not provided for in the future. In that case, she needs to do some thinking from her perspective and act on whats right for her and her kids. I personally think it's a bit sad that they have to separate their kids like that. In my opinion, if they married, the future security of all the kids should be taken into account

Are you the husband or the "friend', does she have her own property and money, what about any other assets he might have when he dies.

What happens to your friend if he dies young of goes into care and needs to sell the house. Why isn't she contributing to the house, is it the house they live in. What if they have a child together.