If you are married to an orthopaedic surgeon (not private practice), how well off do you feel as a family, if you don’t work yourself?

I don't want to work, money is slavery

Two incomes totalling £40K is less than the minimum wage.

Now we have a pension and my salary of £26K, and a paltry £100 a month private pension. At least I know now why savings are dwindling fast. £100K and being told it’s a struggle 😂😂

You're hardly poor if you have a state pension of £12500 + £26K + £1200
That's around £39K and one of you has retired @Dodgyormymind

Presumably the person who's retired has the choice to carry on working past 65?

No mortgage, no childcare, just everyday expenses.

So u know how ignorant your comment is?

I don't understand why you don't want to work. If you are fed up with what you currently do, can you not try something else? Earning your own money is a great thing, whether you need it or not. It gives you freedom and independence and you earn respect.

This post! Do u realise how ridiculous u are? Ur a grown ass woman. Make your own bloody money to keep yourself in luxury if u want it so bad. Or maybe get a reality check. Doctors are working class!!!! They work to support themselves and are payid from government taxes. I don’t know where you think you will be living a life of luxury on a consultants wage. Comfortable maybe but he wont be buying you a Birkin every payday. Get used to it, or maybe go to work full time like other woman in the world who DONT rely on a man to keep them.

You don’t mean to sound like a dick but you certainly do sound like one. Fact!

Agreed.
I also work in the public sector (emergency services) and am on 49k, DP on 24k, with a kid on the way. I have to go back to work when she's 6 months because I have no choice.

OP, Your combined income is more than the prime minister for fucks sake.

I agree. Mumsnet is like another planet sometimes.

Depends where you live - that isn’t much at all in the SE. Why on earth would you want to sit at home BTW?

Absolutely not. GP partners are paid significantly more than consultants. Over time, consultants can increase their pay by taking on extra responsibilities, discretionary points etc but no, if you want to make the most money as an nhs doctor, bring a GP partner is the way to go (but a very difficult job, as they all are in their own way). Being a salaried GP makes less than a consultant.

I'm a bit shocked you'd have the gall to ask this question in a cost of living crisis. Especially because there's no real question, it's just a humble brag.
£110k is many times beyond the combined full time salaries of nearly everyone in the UK. £190k is unimaginable for most.

Are consultants not paid more than GP’s? I know for a fact 2 Gp’s have exactly this life that you have just described, even cars for one of their kids that can’t even drive yet! And they don’t come from money, their family doesn’t live over here either.

I beg to differ the Gp partners I work for have just purchased a multi million pound house, go to Dubai whenever they want, New York for a birthday, long weekends away to wherever across the globe. I think they make a lot more than people realise. (But they are disgruntled at the min wage raising and having to pay more tax for us 🤣)

Totally agree - OP sounds quite young and is just wanting advice. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to be a SAHM and pondering your options - I hated my job at the time and was more than happy to be at home. I didn't want other people looking after my DC, and I loved homemaking. Once they were in school I had a complete career change, worked p/t and eventually owned my own business. We don't live in the SE/live up North but in an area with very good state schools and both my DC are now in promising careers post Unit. A word of warning OP - all the PP mentioning pensions and being financially vulnerable is very true. I speak as my now exH had a midlife crisis/affair and that was the end of my 'nice lifestyle'. Our lifestyle was never planned, we just fell into it really - had a very successful business when we were young and house prices were much cheaper. At the end of the day it's a personal choice - and threads like this always go sideways with people starting to make it about them, and how they feel. Good luck, OP, but watch that pension pot of yours...

Yea, not possible to have a privileged life on the wage of an NHS consultant alone if you have children (unless you have inherited wealth). You can have a nice life for sure, but not one that includes a lovely and luxurious furnished home, multiple holidays, two cars and children who do any activities they want to. Not possible for £110k in the UK at this time.

I agree. My orthopaedic surgeon has been with me through my journey of my disability since I’ve been a teenager and I can honestly say he’s saved my life. I wish I had the confidence to tell him how much he’s appreciated and how incredible he is in his job position.

I remember going for a surgery on my ankle and he done the surgery but saw I had an infected ingrown toenail and instead of leaving it, he ‘operated’ on that problem area too despite having no obligation to do so. Doctors go above and beyond!

Surgeons and doctors, especially complex specialists like this don’t get the credit that they deserve. Especially in the nhs - it feels like their work is just ‘expected’ and their hard work, long hours, prioritising their job over everything else in their life just goes unnoticed and it’s sad! They deserve to have every bit of a luxurious income and an entire different topic in itself - I believe surgeons and doctors should have access to free childcare.

It depends on your outgoings, surely. The incomes being talked about here seem extraordinarily high , but my outgoings have always been commensurate with what I or we have earnt. You can bring up happy, healthy children on a fraction of what you’re talking about.

But how much are your mortgage and childcare costs?

Oh my word, there’s SO much call for private ortho. Have you seen waiting lists?!

Is it just me that finds this thread hilarious? When working full time I thought I was doing ok on £32K and DH on £28K, couldn’t understand how we had no money ever. While kids had grown and left home we had a very small mortgage and endowment, we bought in the 90s.

Now we have a pension and my salary of £26K, and a paltry £100 a month private pension. At least I know now why savings are dwindling fast. £100K and being told it’s a struggle 😂😂

I’m a female consultant. My male colleagues who have wives that are SAHMs have to take in lots of extra work, I don’t just mean private work, just like heads of dept etc. It’s not a situation I’d want to be in these days. It’s unusual though, but no you won’t be as well off as you are now, considerably so with children.

£110k goes much further in some places than others but it depends so much on what you think are essentials, lifestyle etc - we lived an excellent lifestyle on £80k (him) + £15k (me) but we were older and lived in a cheaper city so our detached 5 bedroom cost me £560 pcm. Only had one car, state schools. Others would not find my choices to their taste

Same here, and I wonder how my child avoided rickets and scurvy and didn't grow up to be a criminal on account of having to go to a state school full of common ill-bred types

Sounds like you aren't even married, I'd wait to see if your boyfriend wants to marry you and talk to him about whether he is on board with funding your lifestyle. 110k is around £5,500 a month take home after tax and pension contributions (less if you still have a student loan), if you come from money I imagine you'd feel incredibly poor living on that. I'm not sure this man can give you the lifestyle you desire, might be time to look for a guy in fiance.