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Original poster

Are you allowed carers leave for this??

63 replies

CalmFawn · 18/07/2025 20:32

My DD is 5. She’s had a small lump on her face for a few months that the GP said was a cyst but it’s grown suddenly and we’ve found out this week it’s a tumour. She needs to have some tests and scans over the next few weeks and the date for removal is in 2 weeks.

am I allowed any carers leave for this? My boss says no as it’s not an emergency as it’s ’pre booked’ but I think a tumour is quite a big thing?! And the only reason it’s not being removed asap as they need to do other tests first. I’m not allowed to take annual leave or unpaid leave as it’s August and fully booked

should I accept that I can’t take any leave?

im waiting to hear back from HR but though I’d ask here to see if anyone has any opinions

I work for the nhs but can’t find the trust policies online

thank you

OP posts:
Maiyakat · 18/07/2025 20:52

Your boss would be technically correct according to our NHS trust's policy but is showing a complete lack of compassion. In every team I've worked in it would be expected you would get signed off sick with stress in this situation. Wishing you and your daughter all the best

BeamMeUpCountMeIn · 18/07/2025 20:47

Typical NHS.
I'd get signed off with stress, because you are bloody stressed.

I hope your DD is much better very soon.

SoSoLong · 18/07/2025 20:47

Carer's leave is not applicable in these circumstances, neither is emergency dependant leave. Your only choice is parental leave, but you need to give 3 weeks notice and the employer can defer it. So really you're out of options unless you go off sick yourself.

Anewuser · 18/07/2025 20:43

As @MyUmberSeal says. Legally, your employer doesn’t have to give you leave. You either take a block of a week unpaid dependents leave, or have emergency leave as an odd day to sort out childcare. Neither of which helps.

Working parents who need to take time off for medically ill children end up either using all their annual leave or as @MyUmberSeal says, our GP would always sign me off sick due to stress. And it was always bloody stressful anyway.

Pleatherandlace · 18/07/2025 20:43

wow, your boss is a total arse. Imagine not supporting you at this time. What a dick move.

18Manorclose · 18/07/2025 20:39

I agree with GP. You’ll be in no fit state to work and your daughter needs you.

LuckysDadsHat · 18/07/2025 20:38

Go on sick leave with stress. That your boss is being such an arse about it at such a stressful time is disgusting.

dammit88 · 18/07/2025 20:38

Would they let you swap a day?

dammit88 · 18/07/2025 20:37

Technically I think your boss is right, but morally that's awful I can't believe they won't give you the day!!! I hope your daughter is ok

MyUmberSeal · 18/07/2025 20:36

I don’t know what the official rules are, they probably vary company to company.
But what I can say is my sister had something very similar when her child was 4, and her own GP signed her off for a month because her employer was being objectionable. Job done.

LobsterPants · 18/07/2025 20:36

Of course you can!

Surely pre booked would mean a regular dentists appointment or routine check up. This sounds urgent.

Good luck, hope everything is ok x

drspouse · 18/07/2025 20:35

Carer's leave would be specific to your employer - you can ask for unpaid parental leave in blocks of a week at a time but not a single day.