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Original poster

To find it strange that this friend always says this?

39 replies

Panther40 · 17/07/2025 22:38

Every single time something slightly or more unfortunate happens to this friend, she says she hopes the same never happens to me.
It's just a bit strange and almost seems disingenuous, I'm sure she means well but there's something odd about it.

For instance, her washing machine broke. She said 'I hope your washing machine never breaks!"

She had something like tonsillitis and said 'I hope you never get tonsillitis!'

Then I think she got paid slightly late and said 'I hope you never get paid late!' Each time I just say thank you, I don't know why I just find it disingenuous.
Or am I just being ungrateful? I have my bad luck too but I don't say that to her every single time.

OP posts:
raspberryberet7 · 18/07/2025 01:08

You find it strange your friend doesn’t want you to experience unpleasant things that she has????

PiggieWig · 18/07/2025 00:49

Bit odd and probably harmless but I also think it sounds a bit victimy.
Im probably reading too much into it though.

Velmy · 18/07/2025 00:43

I have a colleague that does something similar, and I thought I was the only one!

Whenever we chat about anything negative, whether its disastrous, upsetting or simply unfortunate (eg, war in the Middle East, someone we know has cancer, colleague lost their bank cards), they caveat it with "Hopefully we never experience that" 😅

"Did you see the news? That airstrike killed 30 people in a hospital... hopefully we never experience that."

"Dave's locked out of his work emails...fingers crossed that never happens to us!"

BettyCrockerClinic · 18/07/2025 00:30

I think you’re overthinking it.

I hope no one every overthinks what you say to them…

Dangermoo · 18/07/2025 00:03

😆 🤣 I love your examples

LeftieRightsHoarder · 17/07/2025 23:59

It’s a kind thought that’s become a habit. I wouldn’t let it bother you.

Liliwen · 17/07/2025 23:58

I’d just say ‘same’ Why are you thanking her?

NuffSaidSam · 17/07/2025 23:56

Sounds like she's got a bit of a verbal tick. I can see that it's a bit odd and maybe slightly annoying, but I wouldn't take it personally or think anymore about it.

XenoBitch · 17/07/2025 23:52

I would be wondering if she had some underlying anxiety going on... that if she didn't say these things, and they happened to you... it would be her fault. So she says what she does as a way to protect you... if that makes sense?

Devianinc · 17/07/2025 23:40

I take what I said back, I’m not in your position to judge bc I’m not there. Wishing you the best. Hope you can make your building safer.

ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine · 17/07/2025 23:32

I couldn’t get worked up about it. Sounds like she’s trying to be nice, just being a bit awkward about how she expresses it.

Devianinc · 17/07/2025 23:29

I just think she’s socially inept. Give her time. She just might not know how to read social cues or is uncomfortable and just doesn’t use the right words.

ThatsABitExcessive · 17/07/2025 23:16

It’s bizarre and I’d end up laughing everytime she said it

do it back to her!

“I just stood in dog shit, I hope you never stand in dog shit!”

“I forgot to buy a lottery ticket - I hope you never forget to buy a lottery ticket!”

MidnightScroller · 17/07/2025 22:51

Just sounds like a harmless phrase she’s latched onto! If she’s generally nice and thoughtful I’d just ignore it