Ex said he will never forgive me

In a sense you could be right, but I think she would behave more neutrally if that were true. Why work yourself up to a level of hatred if you are sensible and look at both sides? The MIL obviously can't - her son is obviously perfect - and I suspect that will always have been her attitude. That style of parenting has bred entitlement.

And he's entitled not to forgive her, she's entitled not to care.

The thing is whether he is in the ‘wrong’ or not is irrelevant in terms of his mother. The OP has decided she doesn’t want to me married to him any more and that’s her right. End of story.

I think this whole right/ wrong obsession causes a lot of issues. Shades of grey.

He won’t change, OP. It sounds like you see through him now.

So what? He's your ex, you've got yourself sorted. As far as possible, block him, his family, his friends. Set all your social media to private so only YOUR friends can see it. You will find out who they are at this point. If anyone wants to dscuss it, giving his side, close them down by just saying "He was abusive. I left. None of your business." Then block them. Only have communication via a solicitor or by letter. Cut loose, move on, enjoy your life.

You have done so well getting this far, OP. Of course this is the stage of maximum nastiness, and the abuse and guilt tripping are bruising and triggering all your conditioning about being a good and cooperative woman. The size of the blowup is proportional to how bad this guy was as a husband. It’s super uncomfortable, and it feels so unjust that his mother is 100% buying into his version of events. But the only thing that’s real is that you’re getting FREE. Just push through and let the wave break over you.

And? Of course he feels like that. If he was a different type of person maybe you wouldn't be leaving him? You're expecting a cat to become a dog. YABU.

Completely different. Read the OP's posts.

They can cope

Who gives a fuck what the mother thinks? Or him for that matter?

It is a generation of mothers that have created the current batch of entitled monsters. They spoiled them emotionally and never told them they were in the wrong. She is more to blame for your ex's behaviour than he is - she created a man who absolutely has to be left.

You will never persuade her that her beloved, precious son is ever in the wrong, so just accept your new position, and check the mother out extensively before making the same mistake next time!!!

Him painting you as the bad guy allows him to absolve himself of his shitty behaviour. His opinion of you is no longer of importance. Give it the same level of indifference as you'd give a random drunk having a go at you for not giving them money.

He is angry because you have left him and you planning your departure in secret is somewhere for him to place his anger. If you’d been open from day one he would have found something else to be angry about and never forgive you for, although I know this doesn’t make it any easier for you. Good luck

I’d be very wary about him knowing where you’re moving to.
x

This!

Well done Op that takes some bravery you won’t regret it. his ego has taken a beating ignore his mum she wasn’t putting up with his behaviour enjoy your new life.

What are you going to do with your new freedom? Do you have any plans, a new focus, something to look forward to? You don't have to make enemies of his family if you don't want, just because they do. You can just do nothing about them. Put your energy elsewhere. After my last breakup, I decided to learn the piano, then ended up playing in a reggae band, it's done wonders for my social life and mental well being, I didn't imagine I'd be playing on stage at little festivals in my 50's. Suddenly life became really good fun.

I don’t think you did anything wrong but…. Thinking about it, this isn’t that much different than the OP’s DP on the other thread who wanted to give the OP “One last nice week” before dumping her. Everyone is rightly calling her ex DP a psycho etc but is that really any different?

Well done for getting away from these chimpanzees. Sound like trash people. No contact as much as possible. I'd get a pay go phone for custody and no contact otherwise. Block his number on your main phone and check social media especially facebook for restriction settings.
His/ their behaviour vindicates your prep.

Well done OP. 👏I love reading these posts where women have left absolute bastards. Obviously I don't love the shit you're getting off him now but he'll get used to it. I hope you thoroughly enjoy your turd-free life. 😁

Will share? Where are they now? I cannot vote one way or another if you left your children with a man who is unkind to you.

Why do you care?
Hes your ex, look forward.

OP remember you are not asking for forgiveness, you are trying to get him and MIL out of your life as much as you can.
Focus on that and your new life x

@PringlesForMe

Angry Abuser: I will NEVER forgive you.

You: honestly, don't worry about it. It's fine. (all said in mock sympathetic tone)

That's all you need to say in this case. Nothing else.