Does your husband/partner apologise?

DH apologises profusely, even when he hasn't done things wrong. I do the same. My mum growing up wouldn't apologise for anything, even when very wrong. It was awful to see growing up, and it was learned by my sister. All I can say is it must be very hard being so right all of the time (joking). Marriage counselling would be my go to for trying to fix this at all. Otherwise, frankly it is unbearable, and if you have children, remember that he is teaching them a horrible trait.

My ex was like this, it was horrible. My boyfriend now is the complete opposite and will apologise. Sometimes we have heated debates but haven't argued. Usually we just agree to stop speaking for 10 mins to chill out and then end up both apologising (depending on the context of the discussion/who was wrong whatever). This isn't normal behaviour.

I couldn't cope with this for an evening, never mind days, weeks or months. You know it's not right OP. It's no way to live.

Yes he does. Not often. Because there generally isn’t any need for apologies. Mostly stuff like “did you get the tea bags?” “Och sorry babes, forgot, I’ll go to the corner shop to get some”

thinking back, earlier in our relationship he could be quite moody, but rarely in the last ten yearsn

The question you have put in the title of your thread, is COMPLETELY different from what you have described here:
He can literally go weeks/months not speaking to me, all because he is convinced I am in the wrong, which becomes very lonely and isolating

I mean, I was prepared to have a discussion about your title question, but this 'months of not speaking' is just ridiculous.
If my dh didn't want to speak to me for more than an hour or so, he wouldn't be my husband.
The trying to turn everything round as if it is your fault, is abusive..

Sounds just like my husband ! It’s exhausting isn’t it .

You don't seem to be addressing the fact that silent treatment is abusive. Google it. It is a way to condition you to behave a certain way and it works because you apologise even when you know you shouldn't.

It is hard to be told that you are in an abusive relationship but you are. I agree Lundy Bancroft online PDF, you don't even have to buy the book, but read it. Why Does He Do That? so you can at least understand what is happening to you.

You deserve better.

My husband does apologise, yes. Its me who has to check myself and dig deep after an argument, as I find it harder to say I was wrong.

Oh yes, this all day long.

I couldn't cope with that OP. How awful for you to have to tolerate that treatment in your own home from someone who is meant to love and support you. He sounds a right tosser.

Ugg he sounds absolutely awful. The silent treatment is abusive. As others have said, it’s nothing to do with thinking he’s right or wrong, it’s about controlling you.
fwiw my husband does apologise, readily, whether he thinks he’s right or wrong, as do I. We rarely argue but if either raises their voice or speaks harshly, we’ll quickly apologise. We love each other and hate bad feeling between us.

Sympathies OP, this sounds a tough and isolating position to be in. But justifying the silence as your fault is classic abusive behaviour. I read an interview with a physically abused woman who described how her ex-husband would always explain that SHE had brought about the beatings he delivered through her bad behaviour.

My DH struggles to apologise because of a hypercritical father. He tries and is working on it. And does a better job now.

If he ignored me for a 10th the time yours does, he would be single. Why are you not ending the relationship?

DH would apologise even if he thought I was 100% in the wrong just to keep the peace. I'm shocked your H can go weeks/months without speaking to you. That is really abusive. I always apologise too.

My ex would do this and sulk, ghosting me for days when he was in a mood. Sometimes after arguing with other people and not even me!

I would make contact and pander to his childishness until I had enough.
This is emotional abuse and he has no respect for you or your feelings.
I left as I knew it would always be like this and I couldn’t live my life treading on eggshells.
I hope you consider doing the same. A stress free life is bliss.

Its called 'the silent treatment', its a well known form of abusive controlling behaviour, and he doesn't really think he's right. He just knows he can get away with it.
Where do you want to go from here? Couples therapy isn't recommended when you are in an abusive relationship.

DH is very quick to apologise (as am I) when needed - we both like to diffuse any bad feelings as we actually care about how the other feels!

Your DH sounds like an abusive twat. That's not a healthy or normal relationship.

Your partner should be a support and lift you up, not pull you down.

This isnt normal you are in an abusive relationships.

You have made a rod for your own back by apologising when you shouldn’t have

its his behaviour choice

Personally I would have dumped his man child ass a long time ago

No wonder you feel so down OP this is horrible & deliberate on his part to punish you with isolation & freezing you out. I was with someone who did this & it was really awful. He literally acted like I did not exist & would carry on his life, calls to friends & family & daily routine quite happily as though I was invisible. He didn’t let me know what he was up to or his comings or goings. I eventually left him. If he ignores you for MONTHS that’s hugely damaging & a window onto how damaged & f’kd up he truly is. Not to explain away his behaviour but to show you that this is toxic & cruel & that’s what kind of a person he truly is. I’d get out. You deserve so much better.