Would you want to interact with a much older mum at the school gate

Don’t be too keen to make
playground connection…you’ll be signed up to lead PTA events before
you can say no

I mean it wouldnt have bothered me but I was in my early 40's when DD started school and she was mixed race as I married a Jamaican, whilst living in the same sort of area as you describe. So it would have been kind of nice to have someone else my age, and in a similar situation ish. I am easy to see as white british but DD is brown british and there were some parents who I am sure avoided us for that reason.

Happily, however, the racist bigots are by far the minority where I am. The mothers you describe will have grown up in a far more diverse world than the previous generation (the one you and I inhabit as I am 52!) and are much less likely to judge on colour or age.

They will soon learn that a good school mum mate who can call on in an emergency is more important than age or race!

No. I don't want to talk to anyone at the school gate regardless of age.

not an issue: when my kids started reception there were parents from age 24 to 50. I had friends across the age spectrum, the ones that stuck did tend to be within 10 years either way but more because of common life stages, working patterns and hobbies/ housing locations than age per se.

I think you are going to get mixed responses to your poll because the question in the title is different to your yes/ no at the end. But when my children started school, I knew quite a few parents who’d had their children in their forties. I had mine in my early thirties and there were lots of parents ten plus years older than me, and then also grandparents and child minders collecting children too.

I made the massive mistake of assuming one of the mums was a child’s nan!! They were year one and I was considered a younger mum and she is about 15 years older than me.
She forgave me and we are still friends the girls are 18 this year!
Honestly age is just a number once your adults and even more I think once you have kids the same age

I get on great with the mum of DD's best friend. She's 22, I'm 44. Yes we have quite different lives but we have enough in common and shared interests. You're overthinking it!

This ⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️

I speak to anyone who’s friendly!

There will be lots of grandparents doing pick up, some of whom will be a similar age to you. You might not click with the mums, but there will be someone there at a similar stage.

I was almost 44 when had mini blondes. So 48.5 when she went to school and now she’s 8 and I’m 52 at the weekend

one of the mums is 28 and a great friend

yes I could be her mum

our 8 daughters adore each other

so please don’t worry @NopeIWontEnterAUsername

yes I’m prob the eldest in the class. I speak to all the mums. Doesn’t matter what age

You’ll be fine .
I could’tbvote as your question was unclear

This post strikes a chord with me!

I'm 43 &, obviously I don't know everybody but as far as I can work out, 'm the oldest mum. We just have young mums at my kids school.

OP I'm very shy & awkward & have really had to 'push' myself to chat to other mums. Since I'd been observing (& too scared to talk!) I knew who the cliques were.

So I made myself chat to anybody (any ethnicity, colour, age, my criteria (in my head) was 'Are they standing alone?'

Now, I have loads of mums who I will chat to. And who come & chat to me.

I have also made a conscious effort to chat to the few grandmas too... These range from my own grandparents kind of age & just a few years older than me... & (Total honesty here) I did notice that nobody else chatted to them.

I'm sure that you will be absolutely fine

I'm only at school as a grandparent these days so I don't think you'll be the oldest! I think people are often more likely to chat to an older person, or perhaps I just find it easier than I did when I was younger.

I would say the younger mums are in the minority these days. I do find the younger ones tend to stick together though but that's not an issue. They probably because they're out numbered.
There is a younger mum that I talk to because our children are friends - I'm old enough to be her mother by a fair stretch but we get along well.

My youngest DC is starting school in September and I am 41, also not white in a very white area. I don't find my age or race to be an issue but there are a number of other mums a similar age to me. My mum friends with kids the same age as mine are 43,44 and 45 as well as early 30s. Don't overthink it.

Loads of older mums at school when my 2 were little. Also some young mums.

My friend had her son at 47 and no one treated her any different at the school when she was 52 and her son started school.

I chat to the grans the dad's the mums..whoever ! I have friends whi are about 10 years younger I think it's all perfectly normal.

Most mums I've come across have been mid to late 30s by primary tbh or older. More unusual to be younger.

You're overthinking it. Lots of different ages and backgrounds. I’ve never really noticed or cared Noa old someone is! I’m 40 and I could be 20 years older than some of the school parents but I’ve never registered or cared.

My closest ‘mum friend’ is almost 20 years older than me and I already knew her oldest dc from school before I met her !
I think when you’re an adult being in a similar life stage (which generally everyone at school gates is) is more of a factor than being a similar age

It's not an issue. I'm early 40's and my youngest us in year 1, most mums are between 35 and 45, but some are younger and everyone gets along fine.

The thing though about tagging along on play dates might become an issue though. From middle of reception year my daughter went on playdates without me and we had children round without their parents, once we had got to know some families. If my daughter could only have friends round where I'm also friends with the mum it would be a bit limiting for her. End of term they finish at lunch and I'm picking up my year 1 daughter and 3 of her friends and their mums will join about 5/6 when finish work.

Our mum group is from 28 to 50 something so I hope you’d be fine. I find I make more mum friends from kids hobbies rather than school.

I don’t really think you’ll be that much older than everyone. I was 40 when my youngest started and I was nowhere near the oldest mum there. I chat to everyone tbh, it’s ten minutes out your day.

I found that you get to know parents when your child plays with their children. Age/race never came into it for me. We live in a predominantly white area and my dp is black and I have friends from different cultures. I wouldn’t have thought it through as much as your op. I wound generally veer towards those who seem approachable. I would say make an effort or it will be harder if you don’t.

Doesn’t bother me at all, sometimes I would rather do the school run without speaking to anyone but it’s not down to their age! When I have time to chat it’s a mix of mums my age, older and younger as well as grandmas picking up or one who has parental responsibility for her grandkids, as well as foster parents etc. You won’t be the oldest but it doesn’t matter if you are.