What thing would help people's mental health

I often think that I wish I could rid the world of abusers and that would revolutionise mental health and do me out of a job. I wish I had a magic wand or maybe more of a magic sword to do away with all the neglectful abusive parents and partners. I don’t have one of those obviously but investment in early years, parenting support and a change in society’s attitudes so that abusive men are not tolerated. Those might be achievable and then we would not need such expensive therapy.

@ninjahamster It’s similar with my Dad. He had a happy, stable upbringing but has had lifelong mental health issues. He’s constantly asked about his childhood as well!

Personally, as a non-health professional, I think it must be innate with him, it’s part of who he is.

It seems as though the consensus is that what people feel would be helpful is 1:1 long term individualised therapy with a skilled practitioner for as many sessions as required. I don’t necessarily disagree but I think it should be self evident why this is not offered on the NHS: it would be completely totally and utterly unaffordable to offer such expensive therapy to all who would benefit. That’s why CBT and DBT are largely what the NHS offers because they are manualised and less based on therapist skill levels and time limited so that demand can be managed. The waiting lists for everyone to have the kind of therapy that people would like would be indefinite. Before IAPT services were invented this was the case waiting lists were just in the realms of fantasy. So it’s not CBT or long term psychodynamic therapy that’s the realistic choice it’s CBT or no therapy at all.

Please get the Dare response book from Amazon. They have a free app as well.

it’s a type of exposure therapy and it changed my life. It’s not about making the anxiety and panic go away, but it’s about learning not to be afraid of it anymore, which in turn makes it less intense and less frequent.

Yep, CBT is the catch all solution to MH issues nowadays. It is not suitable for everyone, but it makes the NHS look good... like they are doing something.

If someone has a lump in their breast, they get it looked at, and have a biopsy etc. If a breast lump was treated like MH issues, you would be told you might have a scan/biopsy, but you need to try and massage it away first... but you wont be told told how to do that for months.

Sorry you have been let down. Th say the squeakiest wheel gets the oil. Sometimes it is a case of pushing more and advocating for yourself. Really hard when you feel like no one really cares though.

My "help" made me so much worse.

I've been struggling with anxiety. Spoke to my GP, was referred for CBT over the phone. Sessions were short and rushed, and I said a few times it really wasn't helping me but was told I needed to complete all sessions.

Not only didn't it help, I'm now having panic attacks and struggling to leave my house.

The PP said they have compassion fatigue. A sure sign to get a new job. Not fair on their service users otherwise.

👏👏 Well said. To be seen by a 'mental health professional' who seemed like they even vaguely had a clue, I had to go private! Up to that point, everyone I encountered was beyond useless.

Absolutely spot on. 👏👏
I could have written your post.

Wanting answers, in the same way a person doesn’t accept ‘generalised cancer’ the whys, the hows, the prevents!

A few people have said how I should put what happened without answers behind me, but seriously how can I. Would they if truth known?

Off to plastics I go I donate skin which may or may not work after the freak stories. It could be painful and more time consuming for something they don’t have answers to, today.
In a couple of years time, the next upcoming surgeon who does not wish to either entertain causes like in 2025, does away with my limb, with no answers I can share then I likely cannot get back that wasted precious donated skin back can I?

But it is ok in 2025 you don’t have to provide answers as a medic and that’s ok. No cause for depression here what so ever.

I feel 1-2 years of counselling would have done me the world of good....except I can't access that on the NHS. Both my GP and the NHS psychiatrist told me I'd have to pay for that privately. All I've been offered is CBT (6 sessions, one course I had in person, the other online-neither really worked as it was one sized fits all and didn't account for ND differences), and the last time I again tried for it was told I was "too complex" but not complex enough to be taken back to MH team.

I must have had about 20,,,+ referalls from GP to CMHT and everytime they declined, until the last time where they assessed me, told me to come off my anti depressants to go onto another then discharged me back to my GP without my knowledge and without telling me they'd undiagnosed me with bipolar and left me with no medication 🤦🏼‍♀️

I fall between too complex for IAPt but not complex enough for CMHT. I feel there needs to be a middle ground.

I do have access to counselling via my work EAP but I've used up my allocated sessions and I now can't afford private therapy after they helpfully stopped the PIP that was paying for it...

Interesting because I also had all that but my MH is shot to pieces. I really struggle with professionals as they are constantly trying to find a childhood trauma when there simply never was one!

Prolonged stress from being in a toxic work environment can cause MH problems though. That does not mean they are not genuine or "true".
Burnout is a thing. People can and do then develop unhealthy ways to cope such as alcohol or even self harm.

I have good mh, I'd attribute it to:

• supportive family (parents & siblings)
• happy, trauma free childhood
• upbringing which emphasised the value of hard work & work as a positive thing
• upbringing which emphasised resilience and a sense of personal responsibility to persevere through difficult tasks /overcome challenges.
• childhood hobbies that provided opportunity for low stakes failure where you could learn how to get over it & move on (music exams, sports matches etc).
• cultural background that discouraged a focus on self/individual and instead focussed on group/family/community needs

having faced a few difficult situations in life and having to come through them showed me my own strength.

I don't dwell overmuch on socia media or give a shit what other people have or how they choose to live.

100% this

often the issue is solved by moving to a job or workplace that's not shit!

In which case this is not a fucking health problem!

True stress/depression is not a normal response to shit circumstances. Its an abnormal response to normal circumstances.

Someone up the thread said ask a person with good MH

I support an audhd child but I have good mh myself (generally)

I attribute it to the following

-No childhood trauma
-A partner who earns enough to enable me to work part time so I have time to support child properly

• time to exercise

• friends who listen and have common ground
• money to spend on decent therapy for child
• a home we are happy in
• animals in the home
• giving back time and love to friends and a small amount of charity work
• a part time job I enjoy

So in a nutshell it really comes down to time and money to enable me to not burn out trying to do to much and a good support network.

I realise I am very very fortunate and I really get it when it's so hard when someone close has poor MH. It's really really hard.

Yep, when Covid hit, my BIL was forced to WFH and he ended up really isolated and low.
My DP works from home, and he tends to go out and work in cafes etc so he is still around people. He gets to know the staff so has a chat too.

i also think we now have a lot of people in their 20s who were in overcrowded schools which has meant that they weren’t given the right support and have become unwell.

@IShouldNotCoco Yes and teaching is a difficult, stressful profession so who’s going to be eager to enter it?

I agree. But what people say they want and what seems to promote good mental health are at odds with one another

@Bimblebombles @ZoggyStirdust It’s a tough question.

Here in the US (and presumably if you go private in the UK), you get charged for missing an appointment. If you miss a couple, they boot you off their list.

I don’t know what the answer is.

Perhaps because poor mental health impacts on ability to attend / engage?

I agree with this. I wfh and am currently searching/applying for jobs. I just can’t take it anymore. I’m sad, lonely and totally fed up of these 4 walls.

Shame really as I have the most wonderful employer and I love my job but 3 years of it has had a very negative effect. No issues with MH at all before then but now I just don’t feel good.

When I was ill I remember asking professionals ‘will I ever get better’ and I was told ‘some people do and some don’t’

I am lucky in that sertraline alone keeps me well. I’m autistic but was diagnosed with bipolar and BPD (wrongly). I think that some people’s issues are more complex.

i also think we now have a lot of people in their 20s who were in overcrowded schools which has meant that they weren’t given the right support and have become unwell.

It’s one of the problems with 6/12 sessions - you don’t have time to feel your way in. There’s no other place you’d be expected to tell a complete stranger your most painful stuff and be deemed “not engaging” if you choose not to do so.