To ask what your biggest problem in life is at the moment

It’s a first world problem , but every job I’ve had I’ve tried my best to be kind and helpful and get on with people and do my best and I end up with the worst co workers and colleagues they have who seem to just take against me for reasons I’m sure about. My latest job has been awful and I’ll be job hunting again.
Compared to some people on this site it’s really nothing at all , but awful colleagues has definitely affected my mental health lately ( only ever minimum wage jobs, had a few over the years)

Kit, retail is just horrible these days. It’s sad the management won’t take it seriously , these criminal gangs are feral.

Getting to the point I'm now genuinely fearing for my safety going to and from work. We've been targeted by a group of shoplifters (who are not a nice bunch) and someone else has already been jumped. And work won't do anything about it.

We're here, and we're listening. I hope you have some RL support and friends to hold you up as well.

It's tough. I don't get the Black Dog very often, but it's utterly grim while it lasts. Do whatever you need to remain afloat.

Dealing with uncooperative local authority. DS needs a special school. His mainstream have said they can't meet needs. I don't know where he will be going in Sept.

Also feel like our marriage is dangling on a thread.

I'm really sorry to hear this @smeg. That sounds really painful. But - you can only make the best decision for you, with the information you have at the time. At one point I thought I was permanently unemployable due to a chronic pain condition. That really knocked me for six, I became crippled with the load of guilt. But that unexpectedly got resolved via pain management therapy. I hope that there is a time when you can feel better. But in the main, you just need to be kind to yourself in the meantime. 🙏

It's such a risk, but set against that I have to admit that I have loved being freelance and having time with my daughters.

My lovely girls went through horrendous mental health issues, stuff I can't bear to even speak of. In the end I was completely exhausted and burnt out by the constant stress of being up all night with a distressed and despairing dd, then having to pick my tired self up and face a toxic, bullying culture and performance pressure at work. In the end I just broke. I couldn't go on. No-one could have. Most people would have broken sooner. I was literally the last mother standing.

So I have to admit it's the best thing that ever happened, as well as being a huge compromise. I try to see it half full, but then im not into toxic positivity whete you don't allow yourself to feel sadness or regret about the negative aspects.

I sincerely hope things improve for him, and you.
Never give up hope

My situation is in no way as tough as some (most) of the posts on this thread, but the black dog is back. Not in danger of doing anything stupid - just feel that I need life to progress but due to circumstances beyond my control I am treading water and it's pushing me under mentally. Need to grit my teeth and look for the light.

The short, medium and long term future of my very autistic 4 year old.

I feel the same about where I live, which (I know it sounds snobbish but I can’t help that) has so many astonishingly limited, impoverished, uneducated people.

Can I ask where you are?

My biggest problem at the moment is my hip, hopefully that will get sorted out soon. I am hopefully getting a hip replacement, all being well on the 29th July 2025. My secret problem is that hearing about the death of an ex-boyfriend's sister earlier this year, has re-awaken my feelings about him (That is my ex-boyfiend). He was very close to his sister and I care very much for him but he doesn't want to know, probably because I am married and I live too far away to see how he is.

Well...the anniversary of both my best friend and my mum's deaths in a few days. Still bitterly grieving and regretting my divorce despite being cheated on. He is my only support here. My kids are being homeschooled due to anxiety and bullying but one's refusing to do any work. My father is dying 400 miles away in a care home who were mistreating him and I had to report it. I've just moved him to a better one thankfully. My sibling is unstable and often blows up at me when stressed. I have chronic health conditions and I'm off work as mental health's in the toilet. We are struggling financially.
I do still believe better days are around the corner though.

Still living in an isolated region with a local yokel culture and my entire life has been wasted in the time I've spent here. I'm looking at that 'Ive wasted 8 years of my life' thread and wishing I could have my life back.

Note to all young women: Do not have kids. Men lie. They lie again and again. they promised us equality in the 90s and here we are, with women's work devalued and still women paying for the lies.

Same!!!

Oh and the air con has not worked on my used car I purchased last year at all this year so I’m dying in this heat with all the hot 🥵 flushes

Hi I’m in a similar situation my son is autistic non verbal had a kidney transplant hates needles & blood pressure monitors we have a fantastic desensitisation nurse help us, it might be worth seeing if this service is available in your area I totally get were you are coming from take care xx

Drs think I’ve had a heart attack after several ECG/ECHO’s I didn’t even notice so must have been mild, I’m a single mom to a very complex medical needs child & one of my parents has Alzheimer’s but hey the sun is shining & life keeps moving forward & my SEND child is the happiest human I know, so it ain’t all bad & somethings are out of our control & we just have to make the best of what life throws at us & look for the good stuff.😀

Perimenopause hell 😔 yes I’m on HrT but still struggle some days.
Divorce final order came through last Tuesday.
Dh only left the fh April 2024 but his reasoning was why hang about 🤣
DD had school refusal which was extremely stressful then she got a place at a learning centre for 2 hours a day 4 days a week so I had to give up my job of lunchtime supervisor which I’d started last October to get experience and do TA training 😭 but it clashed with pick up time, had no one else to do it, previous to that I worked 15 hours in a kitchen but felt I’d finally realised my vocation in life after never knowing what I wanted to be/do. Kind of regret leaving previous job as money was quite good.
So now I’m an unemployed single parent and can’t work again until she goes back to full time school.
She even refused to go to the special centre a few times and I was feeling totally defeated and suicidal 😭
I live 7 miles away from family support and friends. She won’t do sleepovers with Dad so I rarely get a break, if I get asked to go out which is once a month ish he has to come here to watch her and my son who does stay with dad regularly.

Hopefully now she will settle down with divorce and house we are staying in for now. She’s undiagnosed Asd/adhd.

DH left us with a half finished kitchen 🤦🏻‍♀️ I’ve no money to pay anyone to finish it.

I think I’ll be single a few years because how the hell can I date in Perimenopause hell 🤣

@GlitteryUnicornSparkles We weren't given a choice nor were we told a time limit on it so will have to ask about that. It didn't start working until about 13-14 weeks and we've just upped the dose 2 weeks ago so really hoping 2mls is the magic dose for him!
Thankyou! X

I need to raise the alarm on a safeguarding issue for friends who need Early Help. Fully prepared to lose the friendship.

I’m glad to hear treatment is working for your son. We decided to go with Cyclosporin over Methotrexate even though we felt Methotrexate was the safer option from a health perspective because its supposed to start working faster (in 1-2 weeks as opposed to 12-24 week and he needs relief yesterday and in time to start college). 20 years sounds insane, we’ve been told the maximum duration is 18 months. If it doesn’t work or he flairs back up as soon as he stops then he can then try dupixent, which honestly is ridiculous you can’t get from the start given it has far less potential side effects. I hope things continue to go well for your boy.

Can you access a crisis counselling service. Sadly most people don't know how to handle a loved ones mental health. Can you tell them you're not looking for answer or reasoning just a listening ear.
Fight those thoughts, with everything that you have. You will be deeply missed, life is forever changing, the good and bad, this time will change too.
Be kind to yourself, you deserve to be alive and loved, not a memory.

Thank you. The last few days is not as few as first thought. But still inevitably heading that way.

That I’m really struggling with chronic depression and suicidal ideation but when if I try and speak to someone about it I get met with minimising and downplaying because the thought that I am feeling like that is too uncomfortable for others so they’d prefer to just be in denial and pretend everything is ok.

Could you give up the foster caring?