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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be angry

312 replies

Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:09

So all of my family are going to Oasis for my mums but I couldn’t go due to childcare, I would feel so bad as a parent leaving one of my children out and would probably not go myself. Maybe I am just being selfish and bitter because I am jealous.

OP posts:
MyMilchick · 16/07/2025 12:15

Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:19

When everybody was getting the tickets I wasn’t even considered as I wouldn’t have childcare

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They didn't even ask you? Well that part is shit definitely (maybe)

DeedlessIndeed · 16/07/2025 12:10

OP, kindly I think you have fallen into a bit of a self pity slump.
YABU, and I think really you know this but just have FOMO.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, wish your family a nice time and force yourself to move on. Wallowing will not make you feel better.

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 16/07/2025 12:09

They bought the tickets last year but just didnt bother with one for you?

Id be upset too. Thats months to find a babysitter. They could have asked you if you thought you could find one.

Is Sitters still going? They have teachers, teaching assistants etc on their books.

You could have hired a babysitter with that much notice.

Valid8me · 16/07/2025 12:09

But it isn't a special occasion, its an Oasis gig!

Dangermoo · 16/07/2025 12:09

YABU to rate Oasis.

Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 12:08

Valid8me · 16/07/2025 12:06

So you don't even like Oasis but are not happy that other people (who presumably do) are going to see them? Grow up.

Real fans have been unable to get tickets, probably because of people like you who think they are missing out on something.

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I just wanted to be with my family on a special occasion

OP posts:
Valid8me · 16/07/2025 12:06

Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:54

I’m not even a huge fan, it’s just all my family are celebrating without me. I just think I should have been considered

So you don't even like Oasis but are not happy that other people (who presumably do) are going to see them? Grow up.

Real fans have been unable to get tickets, probably because of people like you who think they are missing out on something.

Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 12:05

Isxmasoveryet · 16/07/2025 12:04

I made the choice to have a child and that was your life style choice your mum is aloud to go to a concert without you your life style choices should not effect your mum's decision to go to concert or not

I would just want both of my children there instead of just my brother and his partner. I would feel bad I think and would have tried to make it happen.

OP posts:
Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 12:04

cherrycherrypickin · 16/07/2025 12:01

I can understand why you're upset. The tickets have been on sale for a year or something. They didn't even consider that you could have found a babysitter in all that time. I'd be gutted if they just assumed I couldn't make it and didn't get me a ticket. You had loads of time to sort out babysitting options.

Even if they just got the ticket and sold it as I couldn’t go in the end. What goes around comes around I suppose

OP posts:
Isxmasoveryet · 16/07/2025 12:04

I made the choice to have a child and that was your life style choice your mum is aloud to go to a concert without you your life style choices should not effect your mum's decision to go to concert or not

cherrycherrypickin · 16/07/2025 12:01

I can understand why you're upset. The tickets have been on sale for a year or something. They didn't even consider that you could have found a babysitter in all that time. I'd be gutted if they just assumed I couldn't make it and didn't get me a ticket. You had loads of time to sort out babysitting options.

Onleemoi · 16/07/2025 11:56

It’s a huge tour, the hype around it was massive. Feel sad you can’t go but don’t blame people who can.

Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:55

Onleemoi · 16/07/2025 11:54

You can’t honestly think you’d be happier if your mum turned down the chance to go. What would happen to her ticket?

No I wouldn’t be happier at all, I just don’t think I would arrange something like that knowing one of my children couldn’t come.

OP posts:
Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:54

I’m not even a huge fan, it’s just all my family are celebrating without me. I just think I should have been considered

OP posts:
Onleemoi · 16/07/2025 11:54

You can’t honestly think you’d be happier if your mum turned down the chance to go. What would happen to her ticket?

Jojimoji · 16/07/2025 11:53

I'm one of the millions who spent hours trying to get tickets unsuccessfully.

So I'm jealous of your family too OP and I don't even know them.
I'll fume with you in solidarity.

GoldDuster · 16/07/2025 11:51

It wouldn't be reasonable for the whole your family to miss out on something because you're unable to go. I think that what is underlying this jealousy is that you're the default parent and feel resentful about that in a more general sense.

It's not really Oasis you're missing out on, it's a wider sense of fairness? It's a classic "We're Skint Tour", there will be another one. Jealously is information, don't judge it as 'bad", it's just a feeling. Use it as an indicator to work out what you need rather than shutting it down and judging yourself.

Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:48

It’s done now, I’ll just have to get over it

OP posts:
Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:48

Shnuzzbucket · 16/07/2025 11:47

Well I'm sure that they didnt just get the tickets, and it would have given you plenty of time to get a babysitter (and work out how to get one)

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No they did. It just felt like I wasn’t even considered to be honest.

OP posts:
Shnuzzbucket · 16/07/2025 11:47

Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:16

I wouldn’t even know how to get one, it is too late now anyway

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Well I'm sure that they didnt just get the tickets, and it would have given you plenty of time to get a babysitter (and work out how to get one)

Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:45

Rubyshoes12 · 16/07/2025 11:45

i can’t work out why your ex husband was asked over you?? Is this real

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No he isn’t going with them, he is going separately

OP posts:
Rubyshoes12 · 16/07/2025 11:45

Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:44

I just think as a parent I would feel guilty that everybody was there but one of my children and I didn’t even consider them.

i can’t work out why your ex husband was asked over you?? Is this real

Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:44

I just think as a parent I would feel guilty that everybody was there but one of my children and I didn’t even consider them.

OP posts:
DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 16/07/2025 11:43

Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:19

When everybody was getting the tickets I wasn’t even considered as I wouldn’t have childcare

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I think that puts a different slant on it. Tickets went on sale last year. They could have got you a ticket as you would have had a year to arrange childcare and get to know a good babysitter.

I think I'd be mad too.

Original poster
Guinesss · 16/07/2025 11:43

2024onwardsandup · 16/07/2025 11:36

You’re being unreasonable

but also why did ex husband automatically have preference to go?

I called him and asked if he would have the kids on that day and he said no he can’t as he is going. Yes I suppose I am angry at him and yes I am the default parent.

OP posts:
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