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Original poster

Is it ok to drop out of hen do last minute?

253 replies

BeDearLion · 15/07/2025 20:20

I’m supposed to be going on a close friends hen do abroad this weekend but really don’t want to go. I have a baby and toddler and feeling so anxious about leaving them. Feel like something bad will happen if I go and want to stay with them but also don’t want to let my friend down. Wish I hadn’t committed to this.

I have left my kids overnight before, I usually feel like this before but just force myself to go however this time I don’t know if I can do it. Feel sick and could cry when I think about it.

Would I be a terrible friend/ person for dropping out so late or is it reasonable given I’m feeling like this? Could I pretend to be ill or is that even worse?

OP posts:
Onelifeonly · 15/07/2025 20:30

I can't imagine letting a friend down that way but there again, I can't imagine being that worried about my children because I'd be leaving them with someone I trusted completely. Is that the issue? Or are you anxious about other things?

Emotionalsupporthamster · 15/07/2025 20:27

How old is the baby? Are the kids going to be at home with their dad?

I don’t think I could do that to a close friend at short notice unless I was genuinely ill and couldn’t attend.

CremeEggThief · 15/07/2025 20:25

I don't know.

Will they have to pay extra if you do drop out?

If you're going to pay your share anyway and not try to get any money back for not going at short notice, then don't go. I think it's fair you lose the money and nobody else.

You sound quite anxious, so just use that as your reason and be honest.