I recently had to speak to a staff member (I’m their line manager) about meeting a deadline. the staff member is a bit tricky to handle bur he had a tough life card dealt lately and I eoll always ensure I regulate but they weee getting increasingly more rude with me when I was helping them. In response, they said, “Why are you being so miserable something wrong?” — said in a jokey tone but I wasn’t up for it. so I said okay I think I draw the line there I’m sorry. Let’s talk later with my line manager present as a third party.
Later, we had a meeting with SLT present. My line manager said to me, “Well you obviously know not to approach her at x time” and to the other staff member, “We don’t use that kind of terminology.”
So… basically both sides were “gently” told.
I calmly said:
“I found your comment unprofessional. I was explaining a deadline that was due, and helping you complete it. As your manager, I don’t think we have the kind of relationship where that kind of language is appropriate. Even though you later asked if I was okay, that didn’t undo the original comment. We need to show professionalism moving forward.”
Her reply…
“You mentioned your circumstances (which also are actually life or death major one) but you can’t use that as an excuse.”
I responded:
“It wasn’t an excuse. It was context. I just wasn’t in the best frame of mind.”
The meeting ended with my LM saying:
“Let’s not be a fragmented team. Comments were made on both sides. Let’s move on.”
But honestly, I feel alone in it all.
I
AIBU to think that not only was her behaviour completely unprofessional — but that the leadership response was pretty much like just deal with it too?
I then had another member of the senior team
xome in and laugh about the comment and also then call it a “little fight” I’m all for banter but I’m just getting p*ssed off. Like I know that I’m young but I’m not stupid and it’s how I feel.
Can anyone rationalise this one with me