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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to think it's a bit cheeky to want our house (when we're not even in it)?

344 replies

Firstchoice333 · 15/07/2025 11:43

So, DH, the kids and I will be away soon, and some good friends of ours — who we've happily hosted when we're home — are visiting our city at the same time.
Instead of getting an AirBnb like normal humans, they've casually hinted that they could just "stay at ours" while we're away. You know, to "save a bit." 😬
DH is fine with it. Thinks it's no big deal. I, on the other hand, am firmly in the "strangers in my pants drawer" camp. Not that they'd snoop, but still — it just feels off. I’d never even think of asking to stay in a friend's home without them there. Have I turned into a Victorian maiden aunt, or is this just a bit CF?
So, AIBU to find the whole idea a bit... much?
TL;DR: Friends want to stay in our house while we’re away. DH thinks it’s fine. I think it’s weird. Enlighten me.

OP posts:
MasterBeth · 15/07/2025 11:51

Not weird, but up to you.

irregularegular · 15/07/2025 11:51

I think it's fine. We've had people stay in house while we were away before. Usually my sisters, but also (not particularly close) friends. In the case of the friends, it was a longer stay which would have been quite expensive for them. One of my sisters stayed for a weekend with a whole group of girlfriends once as they found it to be pretty ideal location for them all to meet up from different parts of the country in an affordable way when they were struggling to find somewhere. We have a nice garden and pool in a nice location and I'm happy for it to be made use of.

We've not done it ourselves. But once years ago when our house was flooded we moved into a friends house for a few days as they were away. Some mutual friends had the key.

I guess we're fairly relaxed about that sort of thing.

driftingintheair · 15/07/2025 11:51

Could it invalidate your house insurance if you have people staying when you are not there and an emergency occurs? No idea if that’s a thing but maybe check.

Otherwise no ‘that doesn’t work for us,’ or tell them you have housesitters already lined up.

BruisedNeckMeat · 15/07/2025 11:50

I don’t see a problem. They’ve casually hinted (OP’s words) not demanded. If they’re good friends I would be okay with this. If they weren’t that close I would ignore the hint and forget about it.

NoDuckyDucksGiven · 15/07/2025 11:50

Oh no I couldn't do that. Absolutely not.

Tinkly laugh and a firm rebuffal.

I'm much too private to have people in my house when I'm not there.

Weekmindedfool · 15/07/2025 11:50

They would definitely snoop.

Peanutbutterflies · 15/07/2025 11:50

Our friends offered their house as we live abroad. It was fine we didn't snoop ans didn't use half the rooms. It was a very generous offer...although they offered i didn't ask! Some people are OK with it some aren't. Can you lock up a room and store anything you dont want found?

Holdonforsummer · 15/07/2025 11:49

It can lead to so many problems. I stayed in my brother’s house years ago when he was away (had small children and no money, seemed like a good idea at the time). My daughter broke a sculpture, he demanded we pay for it and we didn’t speak for ages! (We’d also fed his designer cats, cleaned the place from top to bottom and filled his fridge for when he got back). Not worth the potential fallout

Dozer · 15/07/2025 11:48

Cheeky! We’d only do this for close family.

W0tnow · 15/07/2025 11:47

We’ve had friends stay in ours once or twice. Only when we have offered. None of our friends would dream of asking. There’s only a select few I’d extend the offer to. The key is that I would extend the offer.

Whatareyoutalkingaboutnow · 15/07/2025 11:47

Fuck no.
"That doesn't work for us."
Happy holidays.

Roselilly36 · 15/07/2025 11:46

No way, how rude of them to hint, but my DH would probably say the same 😂

User76745333 · 15/07/2025 11:46

This reminds me of our CF friends who moved to the other end of the country and then came back to visit friends for the week. They then proceeded to treat the house like a hotel and invited their other friends over (who didn't even know the host family).

Grino · 15/07/2025 11:46

Yanbu and I find it cheeky that they’d suggest that without you offering the idea up first.

UrbanFan · 15/07/2025 11:45

Nope I wouldn't do it. Tight beggars and pay for somewhere else to stay

User76745333 · 15/07/2025 11:45

Absolutely no way. Its unreasonable of them to even ask.

Hereweka · 15/07/2025 11:45

Not at all cheeky from them. Why wouldn't you offer? I have friends staying in my house all the time if I'm not there - that's what you do for friends. The favour is usually reciprocated.

Dreamerinme · 15/07/2025 11:44

Tell them you’ve already arranged house sitters. I wouldn’t be keen on this either.

Francestein · 15/07/2025 11:44

Hell would freeze over.

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