To let DS stop swim lessons?

We are in Wales but they will be similar.
We had a break for a bit after stage 4, but about 6 months later added back onto the waiting list for stage 5.

Started when they could reopen after covid. Actually got through the higher levels a bit quicker than the lower ones.
Our pool offers sessions in the school holidays where they have a lesson every day. Some times when we did that, no one else turned up so they had 1-2-1. Either way it was a great way to maje progress.

THIS

I work in the industry and the ‘swimming lessons are a scam’ posts make me mad.
Yes, I agree some teachers and organisations are in it for a fast buck. So make your feelings known! Ask to speak to the Lesson Co-ordinator or Manager, or if it’s I-2-1 the teacher. Write down your concerns.
If your child isn’t progressing or is progressing slowly, do you take them swimming yourself?
Music teachers expect pupils to practice between lessons, and I bet all of you with a child learning a musical instrument encourage them to practice between lessons.
Well, big news, swimming is a complex motor skill as well that involves learning to manoeuvre in a strange environment and co-ordinate your breathing. Learning this skill during a 30 min class with several other children can be hard going.
Practice is essential. It also helps to make swimming fun.
Can’t swim? Neither could my Dad. He took me but never went out of his depth. I have loads of happy memories of swimming thanks to Dad.

The OP disappeared after the first post leaving everyone else to fight it out regarding whether 25m is enough.
It isn’t. Regardless of your form.
I worked in a pool that wouldn’t let anyone up in the deep end unless they could swim 50m.

If you don’t like Swim England’s Framework look around and see if there are any STA pools in your area.

Look for 1-2-1 just long enough to get your DS to see that swimming can be fun. I used to have business cards with someone diving and swimming with interesting looking fish on the front of them and ‘Learn to swim….. open up a whole new world’.
Swimming can really be far more fun than ploughing across a pool with a float and someone shouting ‘kick kick kick…’
OP if you are still here talk to the swim school, what is it your son dislikes about lessons. Talk more to your son.

Water safety and lifesaving are imperative too but he needs good swim skills first not just 25m

We live near the sea. There is a storm just now. I could swim 2 miles by the time I was seven. I still swim regularly and used to swim regularly in open water events. However, I have enough respect for water to stay well away from it today.

Not enough people have the common sense to do that I sometimes think sadly. Bring back the spirit of dark and lonely water.

I’d quit the lesson and go swimming with him instead. Has he siblings he can play with in the pool? If not can you arrange to go with friends. I used to go swimming with my kids and play games with them. As well as tiring them out it got them to be very comfortable in the water. I got them to do the occasional lesson when they were older to make sure there strokes were ok

Swimming lessons are often too boring for kids but I agree learning to swim is essential.

I’d stop the lessons and just take him swimming at other times so that he can get plenty of practice and build up his stamina.

The trouble us they don't do endurance swims in the everlasting Swim England stages... its easy to say they should swim 100m or whatever but they don't do it!

I remember getting things like the 1000m badge at Primary school.

@BogRollBOGOFI agree being able to swim 25 metres is important. I was asking about a mile in open water!

Not being able to swim 25m curtailed my activity choices for school camp and banned me from activities that sounded interesting. I was left a "choice" of 2 out of 6, one of which sounded chronically boring. The irony was that one that I really wanted to do (a gorge walk) required no swimming ability during the droughty low water levels, but no tick in the box still ruled it out.

I couldn't go swimming with friends because who wants to be left in the shallow zone while they had the whole pool and diving boards avaliable.

Later in life, if I hadn't learned to swim I'd have lost out on the only accessible exercise in hard pregnancies

I generally felt inadequate about not being able to do something "basic" that everyone else could do (along with not being able to ride a bike). At primary school there were 2 of us out of 60 that hadn't got the hang of it by the end of primary school lessons. DM didn't do swimming because it's a bit cold. (It also fed into the family narative that females are shit at sport before becoming frail and enduring 30 years of arthritis from 60 to 90)

Going to adult lessons at 16 was embarrassing- and the pensioners there didn't appreciate a whippersnapper splashing around, but when I progressed, it became empowering. 2 years later I could swim a mile.

I wanted better for my children, and especially as one of them turned out to be dyspraxic (wonder where that came from...), so it's been a long, slow time. DS1 isn't currently interested in swimming (grumpy teen) but at least he's got those skills and options and isn't held back by being unable. DS2 is doing Rookie Lifeguard for the fun of it.

At their age, I felt like not being able to swim was a shameful, limiting secret. What they do about swimming now is their choice, but at least they do now have options.

@TreeDudette asked if posters could swim strongly in adulthood, and I do. Having been a non-swimming teenager who couldn't go down the deep end, the diving boards, the water slides and didn't get the choiced on school trips, I appreciate the practical differences between being a non/ weak swimmer and a strong swimmer, and it was important to me that my DCs could do more than the minimal 25-50m. The mile is only relevant in that I can still do it regularly and have maintained my swimming ability. The great thing about swimming is that you retain the technique and as long as you're fit, the stamina comes back quickly after long breaks.

Both my now adult/ late teen DD attended swimming lessons until they were 14. Until they were about 9 they were very average swimmers for their age. It was the extra years of weekly lessons that made them into really good swimmers. They'll always have those stroke and breathing techniques and at a swimming pool will always swim well. There were phases when they weren't particularly keen to go and phases where they "stuck" at one grade for longer than they'd have liked but if you ask them now they're glad they carried on. They never swam competitively - not that good- but it's a great life skill.

Stage 4 is absolutely not an advanced stage of competence.

My DC know that they have to continue lessons or swim related structured activity into high school. I've got 2 past year 8 so far.

We live on the coast and it is imperative that they are strong, capable and experienced swimmers.

All my children have been 1 of a very small minority who were at the required standard in KS2, and yet they were also v much in the minority for still attending swimming lessons. Those who were nowhere near the required KS2 standard had all given up lessons years before.

We've attended a variety of provision over the years, including holiday intensives instead of weekly sessions due to teacher issues or boredom or the kids hating particular pools.

I'd try to find a type of provision that is more tempting and engaging for your DC and keep them going to the end of primary at least.

What choices might be curtailed by not being able to swim a mile in open water?

Yes, I can swim a mile in open water (so no rest and energy-saving turns)

It was well worth the embarrassment of being a non-swimming teenager going to "adult" lessons and being the only u60 there. Swimming and aqua-natal were valuable to me when most other forms of exercise were off limits.

I didn't want my DCs' choices of activities to be curtailed like mine had been.

I am so glad I learnt to swim as a child. My final lessons (can't remember what age) were swimming 32 lengths, so stopping at 25m seems an incredibly low bar to me. I swim incredibly sporadically but easily - went for my first pregnancy swim at 30 something weeks and did 60 lengths no problem. Lots of people claim they've taught their children well themselves, like my parents in law, but the learners have very poor technique. If you have been taught well, swimming is much easier as it is more efficient.

i would say at least 50m as a PP has posted this is a common minimum requirement for outdoor activities or even just swimming in the deep end in some pools (my niece was once made to prove she could do 50m by a life guard when she was just in with her friends).

A friend whose child also hated swim lessons told their child that once they got to a certain level they could stop and that motivated the child so that could be something to try to ease the pain.

if your child isn’t enjoying their current lessons I would look for other providers. Things I look for are low class sizes, teachers that are giving constant feedback and engaging with kids, and classes that keep kids moving - they don’t learn to swim by sitting on the side while a teacher talks for twenty minutes. I would consider giving the child a break and may be picking up later if it is a real problem. I would also try and take them for some family swims so that they see swimming as a fun way of moving and not a chore.

I think in most pools they can go without an adult at 8. Going with their friends will be much more appealing than formal lessons.

It takes so long for children to learn to swim. Mine can all swim now but I hated taking them to lessons (so busy and hot and they never all had lessons at the same time so there was far too much hanging around). I think the older two got to stage 7 and youngest stopped halfway through 5 (but was having school lessons when he stopped and was in the top swimming group for his class). He also tried a few pools as didn’t like the cold water. He came on loads swimming on holiday. You/DC are so nearly there- it’s worth it in the end!

I know a kid who has just done himself a serious injury jumping from height into water.

I doubt he would have done this if he wasn't a good swimmer.

The risk from not being able to swim wasn't the problem in this scenario.

Not any more but I also know I’m not ‘water safe’ because I don’t have the stamina I used to have. So I’d be pretty cautious about going into open water even though I used to be able to swim a mile.

Do those advocating for many more swim lessons swim regularly themselves? I used to be able to swim 1/2 a mile as a young teen (I got a badge!) and apart from kiddy swimming with my chid I've not swum much routinely since. I was rather horrified on my return to swimming that I was tired and putting my feet down after 1 length of the pool. I've worked up the stamina now to do 20 lengths without stopping but it's taken regular swimming for a good few weeks. I'd not be confident about simming a long distance in the sea even now.

I suspect most people overestimate their own swimming abilities based on how much stamina and skill they used to have as a child!

My DD took a long time to get through stage 5 - several years (including lockdowns) but then got stages 6 - 10 done in less than a year after that so sometimes they get stuck and it suddenly clicks. However I didn’t have a struggle getting her there, which I think makes a big difference.
She was also older than 8 when completing these levels so perhaps after a break (with going swimming to keep his skills) it could be he asks to go again. I would definitely let him have a break though

I listened to a report a while ago saying a lot of young males drown in reservoirs are confident swimmers. Non or weaker swimmers recognise their limitations.
Young males in a group can get over confident and quickly become overwhelmed.
Maybe just having a 25m badge for swimming in an indoor pool might not be a bad thing as lads ( in general).go through the teenage years!

Before you jump on me with your stories about how sensible your lads are I'm not being totally serious and suggesting giving up lessons. Just pondering that year after year too many young people drown in reservoirs and we hear tales about them being good swimmers.

I think for me it would depend on whether you are able/willing to take him swimming recreationally regularly enough for him to keep it up.

I think being able to swim 25m is pretty adequate from a not drowning POV but the qn is more would he still be able to in 5 years time?

My kids never did swimming lessons because DS1 went a few times when he was 5 and absolutely hated it. DH took them instead and by the time DS1 was 8 he was representing his school and asked to swim for the county, but he didn’t want to. He represents his squadron and regiment in swimming competitions both in the pool and open water now too.

DS2 is also a strong swimmer, who represented his school at times.

I wouldn’t be forcing a child into going who really didn’t want to, as long as you or your DP can take him yourself.

We do quite a lot of water sports and an annual tradition is when the season starts to go out on the loch where we spend most of our time and kids jump in and swim back to shore. I think it is good to know your limits also good to practice getting back on your paddle board in deep water or into your kayak. If you practice then you won’t panic.

Ironically swimming lessons are cheaper for us than non-member casual sessions at our nearest public pool. That's without the bonus "membership" that the DCs have that allow them to swim for free in casual sessions at the pool they go to (different local authority)

For a casual session, I have to pay for myself on top of the children.

My kids all stopped at stage 4, tbh they swim like fish and were bored of swimming up and down pools using different strokes and just wanted to play. We do swim a fair bit in the pool, wild swim in the loch. They can swim a lot, if required, I like to swim lengths and will set a pool challenge so 15 lengths and we will get hot chocolate after which they can do. They just don’t choose to swim lengths without incentive.