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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To expect my neighbour to stop her son playing the recorder in the garden?

158 replies

Alonero · 14/07/2025 20:34

Not sure if I’m being precious but I need a sanity check.

Next door’s little boy (8ish?) has taken up the recorder and every single evening he’s out in the garden squeaking away. He’s clearly just learning – bless him – but it’s the same few notes over and over, really loud and really shrill. It’s been going on for a couple of weeks now and honestly it’s starting to drive me up the wall.

We’ve had all the windows open with the heat and it’s impossible to relax. You can’t have a conversation in the kitchen without it sounding like you’re being heckled by a flock of geese. I tried to hint to his mum the other day – said something like “ooh, we’ve been treated to quite the performance lately” – and she just laughed and said he’s a musical genius in the making. Right.

I don’t want to be the grumpy neighbour who ruins a kid’s joy but surely there’s a time and a place? Or at least… maybe indoors with the windows shut?

AIBU to think a bit of peace in your own garden isn’t too much to ask?

OP posts:
Lovesabadboy · 14/07/2025 22:06

When I was a similar age and was learning the recorder, my mum used to send me off down the fields to play it. (We literally backed on to open fields).
That way I didn't annoy her or any neighbours!

I think the weather is due to change from tomorrow. Hopefully he won't be out playing his recorder in the rain and you will get a bit of peace!

AmyDances · 14/07/2025 22:03

SprayWhiteDung · 14/07/2025 21:36

How many top flight professional recorder players do you know of, though? Ones who release solo albums?

At least something like an ocarina would be much kinder for a starter instrument.

Well the link I posted was Michaela Petri who’s one of the best known, but my favourite is Piers Adams. Here is a video of him playing a lovely Van Eyck outdoors. Perhaps the OP can show it to the lovely little boy next doors to inspire him to practice more.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FDfPsqnRXVI

- YouTube

Enjoy the videos and music that you love, upload original content and share it all with friends, family and the world on YouTube.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FDfPsqnRXVI

BlueyNeedsToFuckOff · 14/07/2025 21:53

queenofthewild · 14/07/2025 21:40

I can’t help. But the recorder is truly the devils instrument

No, that’s the violin. Or the trombone.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 14/07/2025 21:52

SprayWhiteDung · 14/07/2025 21:36

How many top flight professional recorder players do you know of, though? Ones who release solo albums?

At least something like an ocarina would be much kinder for a starter instrument.

How does "he might play beautiful music one day" translate to he could become a professional.

Wolfpa · 14/07/2025 21:48

Ddakji · 14/07/2025 21:44

Do you hate your brother? 🤣

I am sure that someday he will get me back but the video I was sent of them standing round his bed practicing at 0700 is priceless

IleftmybaginNewportPagnell · 14/07/2025 21:46

Jojimoji · 14/07/2025 21:27

I'd say it'll be a short lived love affair with his recorder.

They tend to go hard at it at first and burn out pretty quickly.

Cross your fingers they don't buy him a saxophone.

I was about to say - don’t worry he’ll move onto saxophone soon 😂

Ddakji · 14/07/2025 21:44

Wolfpa · 14/07/2025 21:43

I bought my three nieces recorders for Christmas, it is the best gift I have ever given my brother.

Do you hate your brother? 🤣

Needspaceforlego · 14/07/2025 21:43

Actually wooden ones are a bit less shreeky than the plastic ones.
But im still sure that this will be a passing phase.

Ddakji · 14/07/2025 21:43

BlueyNeedsToFuckOff · 14/07/2025 21:39

How is he meant to improve if he can’t practise?

I’d much rather listen to a small child trying to play the recorder than loud adults at a BBQ or someone jet washing their patio.

He can practise. Inside.

Wolfpa · 14/07/2025 21:43

I bought my three nieces recorders for Christmas, it is the best gift I have ever given my brother.

queenofthewild · 14/07/2025 21:40

I can’t help. But the recorder is truly the devils instrument

Talkwhilstyouwalk · 14/07/2025 21:40

Don't be a grumpy neighbour, just play it back at them when it goes quiet?

Im sure it's a phase that will soon pass and hopefully it will not outlive the nice weather!!

BlueyNeedsToFuckOff · 14/07/2025 21:39

Ddakji · 14/07/2025 21:34

Yes, he might. That’s zero reason why he should impose his practicing on the neighbourhood.

How is he meant to improve if he can’t practise?

I’d much rather listen to a small child trying to play the recorder than loud adults at a BBQ or someone jet washing their patio.

Crinkleybottomburger · 14/07/2025 21:37

Has he progressed to London’s Burning yet?

They make an awful sound, I think the mum is being unfair.

SprayWhiteDung · 14/07/2025 21:36

EmeraldShamrock000 · 14/07/2025 21:33

Not at all. Everyone has to learn somewhere, he might play beautiful music one day. Some tolerance in society goes a long way.

How many top flight professional recorder players do you know of, though? Ones who release solo albums?

At least something like an ocarina would be much kinder for a starter instrument.

Ddakji · 14/07/2025 21:34

EmeraldShamrock000 · 14/07/2025 21:33

Not at all. Everyone has to learn somewhere, he might play beautiful music one day. Some tolerance in society goes a long way.

Yes, he might. That’s zero reason why he should impose his practicing on the neighbourhood.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 14/07/2025 21:33

Ddakji · 14/07/2025 21:28

Yes, it is. Clearly you’re immune because you’re surrounded by even more inconsiderate twats.

So often on MN it’s not the inconsiderate twats who clearly don’t have the skills to live considerately among others who are told to bugger off to the far end of nowhere.

Not at all. Everyone has to learn somewhere, he might play beautiful music one day. Some tolerance in society goes a long way.

Needspaceforlego · 14/07/2025 21:33

Sorry Op but that's hilarious 😂
You have to admire his enthusiasm.

I am certain his Mum tells him to go outside as she can't stand the noice inside.

Bless his heart, I'm sure he'll get fed up and move on to something else soon enough. Or Mum will be trying to channel his enthusiasm for music to something else.

Laura95167 · 14/07/2025 21:30

Alonero · 14/07/2025 20:44

He usually goes for about 30–40 mins, sometimes longer if he’s “composing” (his word, not mine). It’s always early evening so we’re trying to cook, get DC bathed etc and it’s just constant tooting.

You’re probably right that his mum’s had enough indoors and shoves him out. Might try the music idea – maybe a bit of ABBA will drown it out and encourage a duet 😅

Also very relieved to hear recorder stardom isn’t a big pipeline – if this is a short phase I’ll grit my teeth and get through it!

Next year he might learn violin

AmyDances · 14/07/2025 21:29

Rosiecidar · 14/07/2025 20:49

Also it's not like the violin starts awful but then becomes a beautiful instrument it's such a shrill sound in the best of hands..

Untrue. It is the most beautiful instrument when played skilfully, and has an incredibly pure sound.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DXs2q9_PMfA&dp_isNewTab=1&dp_referrer=serp&dp_allowFirstVideo=1

- YouTube

Enjoy the videos and music that you love, upload original content and share it all with friends, family and the world on YouTube.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?dp_allowFirstVideo=1&dp_isNewTab=1&dp_referrer=serp&v=DXs2q9_PMfA

Ddakji · 14/07/2025 21:28

EmeraldShamrock000 · 14/07/2025 21:26

He is hardly torturing the neighbours.
You must live a very quiet life to think this is torturing the neighbours.
Cranky.

Yes, it is. Clearly you’re immune because you’re surrounded by even more inconsiderate twats.

So often on MN it’s not the inconsiderate twats who clearly don’t have the skills to live considerately among others who are told to bugger off to the far end of nowhere.

maddiemookins16mum · 14/07/2025 21:28

Yanbu, there’s a good reason he’s sent outside.

SprayWhiteDung · 14/07/2025 21:28

Nothing for it: time to break out the Best of thr Bagpipes album and leave it playing loudly when you go out of the house.

That'll give you the ammo you need when she eventually runs over begging for an amnesty.

Stormroses · 14/07/2025 21:28

Saponaria · 14/07/2025 20:49

I think it's lovely that he is so keen.

So do I. But we don't live next door! 😆

Jojimoji · 14/07/2025 21:27

I'd say it'll be a short lived love affair with his recorder.

They tend to go hard at it at first and burn out pretty quickly.

Cross your fingers they don't buy him a saxophone.

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