Can we please stop the "be the bigger person" narrative

We can agree to disagree. Making choices based on someone who doesn't matter, doesn't sound very much like free choice. Like I said it depends on the situation, there's a fine line between drawing an Ace and looking like an obsessed saddo because you kept playing the game and pulled out the Joker. Good luck OP, I hope you get your revenge and it makes you feel better about yourself.

Sorry but two wrongs don't make a right. There is standing up for yourself and then there is stopping to another person's level.

Much of this depends on the situation and context.
As this is likely to be based on the thread about a 10 year old child and everyone jumping on against them then this is exactly the time to be the bigger person and move on. It is horrifying how many adults were in agreement to do something spiteful to a child.

This!!!

Sometimes it's not about being the bigger person because of the results that will create for the other person, it's so that you don't become a petty, bitter person fixated on revenge. Best blooming revenge I can think of is to be a resilient, happy person unaffected by the people trying to bring you down. Let them be awful humans and don't even let their actions penetrate, that's like a blooming super power! If I can teach my kids to have it all wash off them like water off a ducks back and be content with life regardless of some of the fuckwittery out there I'll consider that a win!

This sounds very full on, like the plot of a revenge movie. Think we need some more context!

Absolutely, no one is saying to be a pushover. But that's far different from being petty or stooping to the other person's level.

FWIW my mum is always the bigger person and has beena great role model. Her SILs are total bullies as an example, but she's played the long game and it's served her well. Guess who in their old age is happy and guess who's bitter and twisted.

You can still have strong boundaries whilst being the bigger person.

It depends on the situation, especially when your kids are young as these can be "teaching moments" and set them up for life. Do you want them to be confident, mature and unaffected by people that don't matter or do you want them to be insecure, care what others think, and be obsessive 🤷🏼‍♀️ The problem with bullies is they don't care and won't remember you, the problem with the 'victim' is they'll always remember the bully, because you made that person important. Like I said though, it really depends on the situation.

There were plenty of options for OP in that scenario that didn't involve being petty and attempting to ruin a 10 yo party.

You teach your kids to rise above that kind of things because overthinking it and trying to get revenge is a negative mindset that will make them miserable. They will meet shit people all their life, the best thing they can learn is to ignore them and focus on their (positive) actions.

Completely agree with you.

I totally agree. Bad behaviour should have consequences.