Feel uneasy with my partner’s suggestions on splitting food/toiletries costs

I couldn't love this man.

This is the type of guy who will expect you to keep paying your share of household expenses whilst you're on maternity leave with reduced or no income.

RUN

And if you end up staying which form what I've seen on mumsnet is most likely, do NOT give up your financial independence for this man, do not be a SAHM and be totally under his financial control because he will make your life a living hell.

Leave!!!! Sounds awful.

He is a nit picker. It will spread to every aspect of your lives. It's already got to toilet paper usage for goodness sake! Just leave and find someone who will buy you sanitary pads when you are at home flooding and then not recharge you.

Another vote for LTB

This guy is nuts!!!!! Run. And fast! Cannot believe anyone could actually behave like this.

Run as fast and as far you can.
He is very controlling.

This is ridiculous the only thing we adjust for is alcohol as I don’t drink at home so not prepared to subsidise DH on his Saturday beers

Sounds like behavior that will not change therefore not worth addressing with him or having a conversation about.
I would simply leave telling him its not working out, go back to where you were living before, and have a really good think whether you want to be together with such a mean man for the rest of your life, what a miserable existence that would be.

Live alone OP!

Even as a solo mum, it's fabulous.

Who the fuck counts toilet roll tissues used?! Utterly unhinged.

Is he equally mean in bed.

Leave op, or have a miserable, penny pinching future.

Yes exactly this! 🤣🤣🤣

Run away now. After having made a loo paper decoration.

Tightness is an incurable mental health illness, just like hoarding is.

It will never, ever change, because the miser's primary love interest is the running balance sheet that exists where his heart should be. The love bit, the obsession he has, is in his side of that balance sheet coming off better than the other side where you and the rest of the world is. He is unable for any reason whatsoever to let the world get one up on him. He cannot give anyone anything EVER without there being a reciprocal entry in return. That will even include his own children one day.

Now you have seen this, you will hopefully develop the most enormous ick and get yourself away from him.

The only people who stay in a relationship with a miser are the poor women who end up in a co-dependant loop of constantly proving to the miser how they are not after his money and spend their lives existing on the crumbs that the feeling of denying themselves to prove how good and trustworthy they are gives them. Please do not let that be you.

Omg! He doesn’t sound quite right in the head. Long term with him is not going to be any fun at all. You deserve better and should go and seek it elsewhere

Well it will be cheaper living with you sharing the bills than it will be living alone, which is what he needs to go back to doing. I honestly think this a is a massive red flag. It’s possible it stems from a mental health issue that makes him panicky about money, but even if that’s the case the impact on you is unacceptable. Have you actually gone alone with it and paid what he’s said? Telling him to fuck off would be a more suitable approach. Seriously, don’t even give him a second chance, just get rid of him. There’s no coming back from being charged for leftovers and an extra packet of crisps. What a controlling knobhead!

He's clearly not suited to cohabiting.

I'd move out. It won't get better. Begrudging you a bag or crisps more and extra toilet paper? Mali g you feel constantly watched and consioys he's tallying it up when you get a biscuit? Nah, sod that. That's no way to live. How could you still fancy him? You're only a few months in, that honeymoon period was short lived.

What did you mean about paying an extra contribution on top to make it fair?

Absolutely do not buy a house with this man

Wow. He'll be splitting the cost of air soon.

OP i know the dating pool can be a mix but come on really are you going to settle for this? Dont waste anymore time on this one two years is long enough he will scrutinize everything with a fine toothcomb itl start off financially then itl change to other areas. Could you imagine u had a friend round or family, can imagine him saying he'd counted the number of squares left on the loo rool prior to them arriving and following them leaving and YOUR friend or family member used x amount so you would have to pay more! I mean thats pathetic, its borderline OCD, thats not a man! Only one person he is looking out for and thats himself. Does he own his current house or renting? I bet ur paying more than half his mortgage! Next thing u know hel be trying to charge you for the air you breath in his house! I couldn't please dump this one you can and will do so much better

Red flag

Being stingy is the worst quality man can have… It will only get worse with the time. Leave him to his money

This will just get worse.

imagine if you stay and have kids! He would resent your maternity leave and refuse to help out financially. Imagine him paying towards nappies and frivolous stuff like toys and baby clothes! you would be financially ruined while he sits on a mountain of savings in his name.

run

Well thank fuck you haven't bought and you haven't got kids. Get away from this nasty weirdo right away. What an utter fucking freak.

I couldn’t believe what I was reading when he made you pay more for eating leftovers but then I got to the toilet paper. I’m absolutely gobsmacked! That is completely awful.

im coeliac and all my gluten free stuff costs a ton! My husband has never made me pay more than even though he’s paying for loads of expensive food he doesn’t eat. My bread costs 4 times his bread.