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Original poster

Dd(10) uninvited from party

613 replies

freddiewini · 13/07/2025 18:56

Dd (10) was invited to a girl in her classes leavers party after their last day. She’s not best friends with this girl, just friends but she was excited. All the girls invited( only 8 in total ) some of the boys.

She has now been uninvited because the boy the girl fancies told his friends he fancies dd. Dd doesn’t even like this boy or care about boys in general (thank god) But the girl doesn’t want dd at her party because he will be there. Dd has since been called names and been made fun of by this girl at school.

Her mums answer when I queried was just sorry but you know what girls that age are like when it comes to boys.

I would be unreasonable to let dd have her own party here wouldnt I? Dds best friends mum is encouraging me to. We have more room and a swimming pool and I know dd is generally more liked, girl has history of being mean and upsetting people.
What if we have it this weekend, (they breakup Tuesday after) inviting the other girls but obviously not the one who’s been mean to her? I

OP posts:
mumtumok · 14/07/2025 19:16

Vindictive na. Why’s the other parent allowing her to uninvite a friend over something like a boy anyway . The other girls mother needs to show her some morals and I just couldn’t imagine allowing my child to uninvite a friend from a party at age 10 ??! Bonkers

Calliopespa · 14/07/2025 19:13

diddl · 14/07/2025 19:07

Sorry, missed that.

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I might have missed something too: how many are you proposing to invite? If its most but not this girl its a bit too vindictive.

Dramatic · 14/07/2025 19:12

I do wonder what the replies would have been like had the other mother been the op, I imagine she would have been ripped to shreds yet people are here telling op she should "be kind" to the bully and her mother.

Original poster
freddiewini · 14/07/2025 19:12

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 14/07/2025 19:01

Oh, sorry there is a leaver's party where she gets to celebrate, so this is definitely tit for tat. Not a good look OP.

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there was a disco in the school lunch hall weeks ago. that’s not the same. Now it’s coming up to the actually end of the year she’s should get to celebrate with her friends. she shouldn’t have bullied and left out in the first place, if this cheers her up then so be it.

OP posts:
mumtumok · 14/07/2025 19:09

Yea ! Have the party! Wish I had a mum like that when I was younger

diddl · 14/07/2025 19:07

freddiewini · 14/07/2025 17:39

As I have already said. Dd will have hers this weekend. Other girls is Tuesday after.

Show quote history

Sorry, missed that.

Calliopespa · 14/07/2025 19:04

historyrepeatz · 14/07/2025 19:02

Op is taking the high road by having her party at a different time. Inviting her child’s bully to their home where DD should be safe from bullies is not taking the high road.

Agree, Its actually tipped over into passive shaming of the bully.

historyrepeatz · 14/07/2025 19:02

Op is taking the high road by having her party at a different time. Inviting her child’s bully to their home where DD should be safe from bullies is not taking the high road.

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 14/07/2025 19:01

freddiewini · 14/07/2025 17:27

They haven’t just fallen out and haven’t been calling each either names. Dd hasn’t called her anything, she has been picked on and laughed at because some boy said he fancied her, that’s not her fault, she’s not even friends with him.

there has already been a leavers disco that everyone was invited to.

if it’s simply a mum hosting some of her daughters friends then why can’t I just simply be a mum hosting some of my daughters friends too?

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Oh, sorry there is a leaver's party where she gets to celebrate, so this is definitely tit for tat. Not a good look OP.

Grammarninja · 14/07/2025 19:00

Take the high road. Have the party, pull out all the stops but invite the girl. If she's mean, send her home.

Moonnstars · 14/07/2025 18:47

freddiewini · 14/07/2025 17:27

They haven’t just fallen out and haven’t been calling each either names. Dd hasn’t called her anything, she has been picked on and laughed at because some boy said he fancied her, that’s not her fault, she’s not even friends with him.

there has already been a leavers disco that everyone was invited to.

if it’s simply a mum hosting some of her daughters friends then why can’t I just simply be a mum hosting some of my daughters friends too?

Show quote history

Then that is fine, but there is a lot of posts where it is becoming a case of trying to out do the other party. Simply inviting some friends round is fine. Inviting the whole class but not this one girl is not ok.
I would also find it bizarre for you to suddenly send out invites for the party at short notice so I would now wait and do it as a casual pool party catch up in the holidays.
It will seem weird to parents of children already going to the other party to get a last minute invitation to another party, and they may not want to get involved in this bickering.

Whatdoidotoday · 14/07/2025 18:13

@Picklelily99are you desperate for friends or to be liked by people? Because no one likes or respects a doormat. I’m glad the op isn’t teaching her daughter to be one.

Vodkamummy · 14/07/2025 18:13

Do it, but invite the girl then uninvite her, yeah I'm petty that way!

Whatdoidotoday · 14/07/2025 18:10

Please please do it and make it epic. Shitty 10yo needs to learn a lesson.

Calliopespa · 14/07/2025 17:54

SharpFox · 14/07/2025 17:52

Yes, do it! X

Exactly, And why not a clash? Your dd is no longer otherwise engaged...

SharpFox · 14/07/2025 17:52

Yes, do it! X

SharpFox · 14/07/2025 17:52

Yes, do it! X

Thanksforyourlackofthought · 14/07/2025 17:47

Divide and conquer I say.

Hulabalu · 14/07/2025 17:40

freddiewini · 14/07/2025 17:39

As I have already said. Dd will have hers this weekend. Other girls is Tuesday after.

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Why not make it clash 😄

Original poster
freddiewini · 14/07/2025 17:39

diddl · 14/07/2025 17:34

if it’s simply a mum hosting some of her daughters friends then why can’t I just simply be a mum hosting some of my daughters friends too?

You can.

It just doesn't have to clash with the original party.

As I have already said. Dd will have hers this weekend. Other girls is Tuesday after.

OP posts:
Calliopespa · 14/07/2025 17:36

diddl · 14/07/2025 17:34

if it’s simply a mum hosting some of her daughters friends then why can’t I just simply be a mum hosting some of my daughters friends too?

You can.

It just doesn't have to clash with the original party.

Isn't that actually less mean: to do it when the uninvited have something else to distract them anyway?

diddl · 14/07/2025 17:34

if it’s simply a mum hosting some of her daughters friends then why can’t I just simply be a mum hosting some of my daughters friends too?

You can.

It just doesn't have to clash with the original party.

Original poster
freddiewini · 14/07/2025 17:27

Moonnstars · 14/07/2025 14:48

This!!

We are only getting one side of the story about this girl being 'mean'. It seems to happen all the time with girls falling out and calling eachother names then being mates again a week later.

@freddiewini you still haven't said whether there is an official school leavers event which everyone is invited to.
There are some still missing the fact that 'mean girl' isn't hosting a party for everyone and that not all the class were invited anyway. People seem to be making a big thing about this leavers party but it's simply another mum that has offered to host some of her daughter's friends.

Show quote history

They haven’t just fallen out and haven’t been calling each either names. Dd hasn’t called her anything, she has been picked on and laughed at because some boy said he fancied her, that’s not her fault, she’s not even friends with him.

there has already been a leavers disco that everyone was invited to.

if it’s simply a mum hosting some of her daughters friends then why can’t I just simply be a mum hosting some of my daughters friends too?

OP posts:
Original poster
freddiewini · 14/07/2025 17:23

Picklelily99 · 14/07/2025 13:56

But that's EXACTLY what you want to be! You WANT to be mean! You WANT revenge, on behalf of your daughter. You want a bigger, better party. To show this girl what? That you can outdo her on the party stakes? That you've got a 'bigger pool anyway so ner ner ner!' Showing someone you're being friendly DESPITE what they're doing to you, throws them completely! They can't handle it! And to all the world watching, YOU are being perfectly lovely, so there's absolutely no comeback!

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Why are you so angry? It’s not revenge. It’s making up for my daughter being bullied, letting her have a leavers party with her friends, that’s it. She’s already upset, she’s didn’t do anything wrong, why should I make her suffer more?

OP posts:
MustWeDoThis · 14/07/2025 17:12

freddiewini · 13/07/2025 18:56

Dd (10) was invited to a girl in her classes leavers party after their last day. She’s not best friends with this girl, just friends but she was excited. All the girls invited( only 8 in total ) some of the boys.

She has now been uninvited because the boy the girl fancies told his friends he fancies dd. Dd doesn’t even like this boy or care about boys in general (thank god) But the girl doesn’t want dd at her party because he will be there. Dd has since been called names and been made fun of by this girl at school.

Her mums answer when I queried was just sorry but you know what girls that age are like when it comes to boys.

I would be unreasonable to let dd have her own party here wouldnt I? Dds best friends mum is encouraging me to. We have more room and a swimming pool and I know dd is generally more liked, girl has history of being mean and upsetting people.
What if we have it this weekend, (they breakup Tuesday after) inviting the other girls but obviously not the one who’s been mean to her? I

Absolutely do it. The best lessons are taught with a dose of humiliation and humble pie. Make it epic with goody bags - Cheap, sparkly nail varnish, lipgloss, fidget toys, sweets etc. My nan used to throw a 'lucky day' party and she would coat a massive sponge in chocolate and smarties and call it a lucky day cake.