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Dd(10) uninvited from party

613 replies

freddiewini · 13/07/2025 18:56

Dd (10) was invited to a girl in her classes leavers party after their last day. She’s not best friends with this girl, just friends but she was excited. All the girls invited( only 8 in total ) some of the boys.

She has now been uninvited because the boy the girl fancies told his friends he fancies dd. Dd doesn’t even like this boy or care about boys in general (thank god) But the girl doesn’t want dd at her party because he will be there. Dd has since been called names and been made fun of by this girl at school.

Her mums answer when I queried was just sorry but you know what girls that age are like when it comes to boys.

I would be unreasonable to let dd have her own party here wouldnt I? Dds best friends mum is encouraging me to. We have more room and a swimming pool and I know dd is generally more liked, girl has history of being mean and upsetting people.
What if we have it this weekend, (they breakup Tuesday after) inviting the other girls but obviously not the one who’s been mean to her? I

OP posts:
Hothothothothothotlovingit · 13/07/2025 19:25

If this is what it takes to live in your world then do it (only if your pool is heated to 30 degrees as a cold pool is just so naff and depressing).

I would take my DC out for the day and not be drawn into an American teen drama situation.

Have a movie day with your DD. Heathers, Pretty in Pink and The Breakfast Club may help you weather the storm!

freddiewini · 13/07/2025 19:24

Huggersunite · 13/07/2025 19:16

As long as they don’t clash, because that would be a bit spiteful, I absolutely would do it.

Was the original idea is that they would, being a leavers party after the the last day of school.

OP posts:
PleaseStopEatingMyStuff · 13/07/2025 19:24

Do it.
Your daughter is your priority. Give her an amazing time.

Hoppinggreen · 13/07/2025 19:23

Do it, order pizza as well

cantkeepawayforever · 13/07/2025 19:23

I think it is ok to hold another party, but obviously NOT at the same time - if only because you put all the nice kids and their families in the impossible position of having to ‘choose sides’.

ElfAndSafetyBored · 13/07/2025 19:23

freddiewini · 13/07/2025 19:10

Oh wow, I was expecting it to be a resounding no.

I really really want to, I don’t want dd to be upset and excluded but I don’t know if I can let her be the mean girl excluding someone else and making them upset

Surely you should go for it but also invite the mean girl? Then you teach the lesson (she can’t exclude your daughter) and keep the high road. Otherwise I think it makes you look as bad as her really, even though she started it.

Theredjellybean · 13/07/2025 19:22

Have a party but invite all the girls and boys.
Demonstrate better manners and it's utterly ridiculous at 10 that this kind of behaviour is allowed

mnahmnah · 13/07/2025 19:22

You are entitled to throw a party for your child whenever you want to and invite whoever she wants to. The only time it would be unacceptable is if you planned it for the same time as the other one, which you aren’t, so go ahead and give your DD a great party to celebrate in her own way with people she likes

RoaryMouth · 13/07/2025 19:20

How mean of them. A 10 year old we can forgive - just needs told what’s what on that nonsense. However she’s sadly got a weak, ridiculous parent. Go ahead and throw your daughter a party. I think I would maybe invite the other girl to show the mother how to behave properly.

Overthebow · 13/07/2025 19:20

freddiewini · 13/07/2025 19:10

Oh wow, I was expecting it to be a resounding no.

I really really want to, I don’t want dd to be upset and excluded but I don’t know if I can let her be the mean girl excluding someone else and making them upset

But the other girl uninvited your dd, so you’re just doing this so your dd gets to go to a party.

thisisfrommathilda · 13/07/2025 19:20

You don't mean the same day do you?

Mulledjuice · 13/07/2025 19:18

freddiewini · 13/07/2025 19:10

Oh wow, I was expecting it to be a resounding no.

I really really want to, I don’t want dd to be upset and excluded but I don’t know if I can let her be the mean girl excluding someone else and making them upset

You dont mean you'd hold a rival party at the same time, surely?
?

Wadadli · 13/07/2025 19:18

KeepCalmAndPretendItIsOnTheLessonPlan · 13/07/2025 19:04

I think that would come under reaping what you sow and might be a decent lesson to both the girl and her mum.
I'd also prepare yourself for a text message from said mum, at which point you shorten your reply to: Sorry, I'm sure you know what girls that age are like when it comes to being hurt and humiliated in class.
As an aside, it is damned scary how many young girls are seeking validation from boys so early. I think the modern parlance is thirsty but good God, TikToks should be banned.

First post calls it. This will teach mother and child a lesson 🤣

beachcitygirl · 13/07/2025 19:18

Do it

Trallers · 13/07/2025 19:16

When the mum replied is it clear she knows exactly why the invitation was rescinded? I.e her dd is excluding your dd because a boy apparently fancies her? I'd want to be sure she has the full story and isn't just thinking they fell out and thus "you know what girls this age are like". But if she know and is supporting that behviour then that's dreadful and you should let dd have her best friend and others round for a party.

Huggersunite · 13/07/2025 19:16

As long as they don’t clash, because that would be a bit spiteful, I absolutely would do it.

MissFahrenheit · 13/07/2025 19:16

Do it. Your DD currently has no leavers party to go to, why should she miss out.

flumposie · 13/07/2025 19:16

Do it.

itsgettingweird · 13/07/2025 19:16

Oh yes definitely host a pool party.

On would advertise it as that too.

and a bbq and chocolate fountain.

Love the idea to reply with “well you know what girls who’s age are like” of the other mum gets shirty.

doneandone · 13/07/2025 19:15

Definitely do it! Why should your dd lose out on a leaving party because the mean girl. Let dd invite who she wants to

PinkGlitterNails · 13/07/2025 19:15

I was going to say do it but actually, it’s teaching your DD to be a mean girl and exclude someone. Have the party and invite the other girl, then you have the moral high ground. She/her mother can choose whether or not she attends.

MondayYogurt · 13/07/2025 19:15

I don’t see the point of owning a pool if the kids don’t get to throw pool parties at every excuse.

doggydaydreams · 13/07/2025 19:15

Do it, And if the mum asks why just say ‘oh you know what girls are like at this age’

MyCyanReader · 13/07/2025 19:13

I wouldn't lower yourself and your DD to their level.

What a horrible thing for this girl to do.

I'd have the party but also invite this girl just to show that your DD isn't a bitch like she is.

If she's friends with this boy she perhaps could contact him and point out itw ridiculous she has been uninvited because APPARENTLY he fancies her and jokingly blame him for her uninvite!

User37482 · 13/07/2025 19:13

Yeah I think it’s fine, it’s not on the same day but why shouldn’t your DD have a leaving do herself.

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