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AIBU?

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Original poster

Bad experience in M&S fitting rooms

321 replies

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 14:00

I’ve recently lost a lot of weight and so need a lot of new summer and holiday clothes.

I came over to M&S this morning and had a trolley full of clothes and other such items, walking up to the fitting rooms and the woman looks me up and down and then asks how much I have, as “8 items is the maximum, to stop some types” from stealing. I offer to split it up and she rolls her eyes and says “I suppose you can”

I go in, try on my eight items, split them into what I do and don’t want and come back out, she then huffs and asks if I really need to go again? I said yes, as I’ve lost a lot of weight and don’t know what size I am. She looked me up and down and then asked how big I had been before if this is the after!! I just took the number from her and went back in.

AIBU or was she totally out of line?

OP posts:
Christmasbear1 · 12/07/2025 15:20

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:18

Well if you can live with that and pushing another family into poverty because she hurt your feelings thats on you I couldnt. But im not sensitive like that and would of said something to her face then moved on with my life.

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Poverty? What are you on about? She is responsible for her own behaviour and if she gets fired then that's on her

Sodthesystem · 12/07/2025 15:20

That was bitch slap territory if ever there was one. The cheeky cow.

Maybe she's trying to get fired.

BlueyNeedsToFuckOff · 12/07/2025 15:20

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:18

Well if you can live with that and pushing another family into poverty because she hurt your feelings thats on you I couldnt. But im not sensitive like that and would of said something to her face then moved on with my life.

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Why are you trying to guilt trip the OP? Any consequences are a result of the employee’s rudeness.

Unless you think people should have no consequences for their behaviour?

Christmasbear1 · 12/07/2025 15:19

I would defo complain.
there's air con in M&S, she has it much better than most! So don't blame it on the heat
she sounds rude and horrible

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:19

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:18

I wish I had the balls to do that, but I’m sensitive about my weight, so struggle to tell if I’m overreacting or not

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No your not that would of been the time not dragging it out driving yourself crazy

Original poster
TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:18

Pinepeak2434 · 12/07/2025 15:17

I would have told her outright she was rude as I won’t tolerate people speaking to me like shite - I don’t care how thankless her job is…don’t take it out on me! Sometimes people will keep being rude because other people let them get away with it, it takes someone to put them in their place every now and then.

Edited

I wish I had the balls to do that, but I’m sensitive about my weight, so struggle to tell if I’m overreacting or not

OP posts:
alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:18

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:15

I may well do, I don’t know yet. But if she gets fired as a result of that, it’ll be because of her behaviour, not me complaining about it.

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Well if you can live with that and pushing another family into poverty because she hurt your feelings thats on you I couldnt. But im not sensitive like that and would of said something to her face then moved on with my life.

Megifer · 12/07/2025 15:17

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:15

I may well do, I don’t know yet. But if she gets fired as a result of that, it’ll be because of her behaviour, not me complaining about it.

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She'll very likely get further training, which is a good thing for her.

Tbh next person shes incredibly rude to might end up nutting her so you might be doing her a favour 😂

Pinepeak2434 · 12/07/2025 15:17

I would have told her outright she was rude as I won’t tolerate people speaking to me like shite - I don’t care how thankless her job is…don’t take it out on me! Sometimes people will keep being rude because other people let them get away with it, it takes someone to put them in their place every now and then.

Evaka · 12/07/2025 15:17

HundredMilesAnHour · 12/07/2025 14:09

She was a bit rude but it’s a pretty thankless job, and must be utterly miserable in this heat - and with all the recent issues M&S have had.

You were a bit silly taking so many items in with you. In what world did you think you were living that any changing room would let you in with so much stuff? Apart from the waiting time for any poor person coming after you who also wants to use the changing rooms. You were a bit silly / thoughtless, she was a bit rude. I think it probably evens out. Congratulations on your weight loss and enjoy your new wardrobe.

Jesus, are you the employee?

Teacaketravesty · 12/07/2025 15:16

I think you should complain. She won’t lose her job over a one-off incident. If she’s frequently so horrible to customers, maybe she subconsciously wants to get fired.

I think her rudeness and the bizarre excusing of it on this thread is related to a belief that it’s ok to look down on overweight people. It isn’t.

Original poster
TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:15

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:15

So you're not going to put a formal complaint in then?

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I may well do, I don’t know yet. But if she gets fired as a result of that, it’ll be because of her behaviour, not me complaining about it.

OP posts:
alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:15

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:13

I never said I was going to get them fired either.

I think you need to relax a little.

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So you're not going to put a formal complaint in then?

CountFucula · 12/07/2025 15:14

HundredMilesAnHour · 12/07/2025 14:09

She was a bit rude but it’s a pretty thankless job, and must be utterly miserable in this heat - and with all the recent issues M&S have had.

You were a bit silly taking so many items in with you. In what world did you think you were living that any changing room would let you in with so much stuff? Apart from the waiting time for any poor person coming after you who also wants to use the changing rooms. You were a bit silly / thoughtless, she was a bit rude. I think it probably evens out. Congratulations on your weight loss and enjoy your new wardrobe.

???

BlueyNeedsToFuckOff · 12/07/2025 15:14

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:12

You do realise getting somebody fired can ruin their life right 🤔

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OP wouldn’t be getting someone fired. IF the assistant was fired (and it’s a big “if”; most employers would go to warnings / additional training first) then it’s her own behaviour that caused it.

Megifer · 12/07/2025 15:14

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:10

What are you on about 😂 I’ve not once said that I’m trying to “ruin her life”. I asked because, understandably, my weight is a sensitive point for me and I didn’t know if I was being sensitive or not.

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You're NOT being sensitive and her behaviour really does need addressing.

I'd absolutely complain. Whatever happens as a result would not be your fault in the slightest.

Original poster
TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:13

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:12

You do realise getting somebody fired can ruin their life right 🤔

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I never said I was going to get them fired either.

I think you need to relax a little.

OP posts:
alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:12

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:10

What are you on about 😂 I’ve not once said that I’m trying to “ruin her life”. I asked because, understandably, my weight is a sensitive point for me and I didn’t know if I was being sensitive or not.

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You do realise getting somebody fired can ruin their life right 🤔

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:12

DreamingofTimbuktuagain · 12/07/2025 15:10

No I quite clearly said it wasn’t acceptable for anyone to be rude. I’ll try and remember all retail staff are akin to saints and can say whatever they like ….

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Again never said that, iv repeatedly said what she said wasnt ok but do I want another human being to lose their job, risk their home struggle to feed their kids. No

Original poster
TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:10

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:10

Im great which is why i dont go around trying to ruin people's lives because someone hurt my feelings. Are you ok

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What are you on about 😂 I’ve not once said that I’m trying to “ruin her life”. I asked because, understandably, my weight is a sensitive point for me and I didn’t know if I was being sensitive or not.

OP posts:
DreamingofTimbuktuagain · 12/07/2025 15:10

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:06

So what your saying is its ok for some and not for others. Working with the general public absolutely is comparable. Drs already think their God the more people who think like you really dont help matters

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No I quite clearly said it wasn’t acceptable for anyone to be rude. I’ll try and remember all retail staff are akin to saints and can say whatever they like ….

Bobandbear25 · 12/07/2025 15:10

Thats horribly rude and unnecessary. Huge congratulations on your incredible weight loss, you must feel amazing, don’t let her put a dampener on it.

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:10

TwinTantrums · 12/07/2025 15:08

Are you okay?

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Im great which is why i dont go around trying to ruin people's lives because someone hurt my feelings. Are you ok

Anywherebuthere · 12/07/2025 15:09

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 14:15

The last comment was not ok but surely you can grasp what size you are from trying a few things on. I can understand her being internally annoyed as taking a significant amount of clothes and then leaving half of them is just creating more work unnecessarily but she should of smiled and kept her gob shut

Not really. Especially after weight loss. Body shape changes. It really isn't easy to tell.
The fit of clothes in the same size can be different too.

alexalisten · 12/07/2025 15:09

BlueyNeedsToFuckOff · 12/07/2025 15:05

Yes. And nobody has ever been gratuitously rude to me or the people I’ve been accompanying.

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Where is your hospital trust? Im under 4 and have spent nearly 40 years in and out of hospital and iv met a lot of horrible nhs staff who say the absolutely most vile things you could think of when your at your most vulnerable