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AIBU?

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Original poster

New to child maintenance

60 replies

BeBusyHelper · 12/07/2025 08:39

Hi all just a quick question

just applied for CMS and I’ve just got a message saying that I will receive £212 per month for one child. The father of my child we have split apart his head of year in London non-teaching role and I believe that he gets paid more than what he does. He only has a child for one night he doesn’t pay for any expenses like school clothing or anything or things she really needs. I pay for all her activities. I believe he has no bills to pay because he lives with his mother, i.e. mortgage he does not drive. she spent one night with him on the weekend and he phones her when he feels like it. It could be weeks most of the time I see on their stories that is our party and everything so how can I go by that they are paying the right amount if he’s expenses ain’t calculate him right?

question is do you think I am getting enough money for my daughter per month?

OP posts:
Original poster
BeBusyHelper · 12/07/2025 08:59

Eviebeans · 12/07/2025 08:56

Could he have another child as that would make a difference

Only child

OP posts:
Original poster
BeBusyHelper · 12/07/2025 08:57

Ohdearwhatnow4 · 12/07/2025 08:50

They don't take into account his outgoings or weather he has a car. They also don't take onto account any activities you choose to send dc to. Maintenance is just that to help with the essentials of the child. You also can't make him have more communication than he wants. I believe some people only get like £5 a week. Luckily my ex paids a decent amount but that's not always been the way

It’s just frustrating that £212 is actually I asked him for more money but rather go out and play football and go clubbing instead so basically he has a Saturday night and Sunday but He leaves her at home while he goes out and plays football on Sunday. So he just has her on the weekend, but he’s not really there with her. He’s always out. He’ll put her to bed and then he’s gone out and leaves her with his mother. The plus side that he only lives 4 miles away and he wouldn’t even pick up his daughter from school or take her to school he doesn’t wanna during the week because it will affect his life.

OP posts:
lalalalalala2024 · 12/07/2025 08:56

It’s also after pension too, he could be putting a lot into his pension which has lowered how much he has to give

Eviebeans · 12/07/2025 08:56

Could he have another child as that would make a difference

RhaenysRocks · 12/07/2025 08:53

Do you not know roughly what he was earning? If so you can use the CMS online calculator. I'd say that's a little on the low side for a HoY salary London waiting too. The stuff about his bills etc are irrelevant for the purposes of CMS, unfair as that may be. It's purely on salary and nights spent with each parent. Get used to the fact that you will be spending a far greater proportion of your salary on the child than he will.

Ohdearwhatnow4 · 12/07/2025 08:52

CMS get his average income from tax record

Ohdearwhatnow4 · 12/07/2025 08:50

They don't take into account his outgoings or weather he has a car. They also don't take onto account any activities you choose to send dc to. Maintenance is just that to help with the essentials of the child. You also can't make him have more communication than he wants. I believe some people only get like £5 a week. Luckily my ex paids a decent amount but that's not always been the way

Ohdearwhatnow4 · 12/07/2025 08:50

They don't take into account his outgoings or weather he has a car. They also don't take onto account any activities you choose to send dc to. Maintenance is just that to help with the essentials of the child. You also can't make him have more communication than he wants. I believe some people only get like £5 a week. Luckily my ex paids a decent amount but that's not always been the way

Original poster
BeBusyHelper · 12/07/2025 08:50

even if he doesn’t contribute to anything, and he’s been in that role for so many years now I don’t get an income me because I’m a part-time in university. he goes on a holidays all the time so it’s not think about taking his daughter on holiday. My question is it’s quite high up in school education and he’s been doing the job for many years now and plus he works in London so it should be London wage where I’ve looked online as roughly 36K and a year so is £212 a month justifying that wage. could he be telling CMS that he has a more than what he actually does?

OP posts:
alexalisten · 12/07/2025 08:44

This is about about average for 1 child

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