Instances where you’ve been the cheeky fucker

I don’t think there’s anything wrong here at all, you are part of a community and people help each other out. I don’t get what the problem is at all.

If you were out drinking Prosecco or on a date or just cba and did it all the time that would be very sad for your son and very cf behaviour (I have encountered mums like this but still help out for the child’s sake ).
You were working and it’s perfectly understandable that you are not available all the time, what ever happened to it takes a village!

Um… you were the CF, not the child. Not sure what being Chinese has to do with anything!

CF would have been messaging the mum last minute and asking her to take him. Just forgetting him and assuming someone would pick up your slack is completely irresponsible parenting. Anything could have happened.

People are always so strange on these types of threads. I wouldn't blink an eye at another mum hoping I'd keep an eye on her kid while she was stuck at work. I would hope any of the mums I know would feel confident that I'd step in in these circumstances without a moment's bad feeling.

People want a community or a village to be there for them in times of need, but then get on their high horses about being the village for other people. But being there for others in a pinch is what makes a community! If you're so haughty and transactional about it you'll never create one.

Surely the DS could've made his own way home

Why neglectful. Son surely old enough to walk himself home. He will be at secondary school in a few weeks

I'd say not a CF as it's year 6. By year 5 random friends would appear at my house after school and were always welcome. They would either get a phone call to go home, or a parent would wander by on a dog walk to pick them up, ocassionally we would check if they needed a lift home if the weather got bad or it was getting near tea time. Children of that age need to start sorting their social lives to an extent. It probably does depend where you live in the country but I am suprised so many think it is a massive no.

Bit much to expect a y6 kid to sit in McD’s without food while his sister eats and you don’t give him enough attention to keep him distracted (you noticed him at the party table)!

Oh that’s funny 🤣. Hopefully you offered then some cash to cover it?

@NebulousWhistler you are most definitely a cheeky fucker of the highest order!

I try to never be a CF but a few weekends ago I asked for help overseeing my teenager at an event (I couldn’t be there due to a previously agreed appointment) and ended up causing the parent helping me untold worry that my child was hurt. Honestly feel terrible and now feel like I can never ask for help again.

I don’t think it’s a big deal for Y6 to go to the park without you and I genuinely wouldn’t mind taking someone else’s kids to the park or walking them home. I’d find it really weird they hadn’t just asked though. I often feel like a portion of mumsnet think asking for help amounts to CF. If so I’m guilty. I’ll ask people to help with drop offs or pick ups or logistics generally if stuck. I’m also happy to help other people when they are stuck. It’s very clear some people are uncomfortable with the idea and others very happy to do it.

My Y2 DD had a birthday party which was hosted by a Chinese family at a party centre and they were all sat eating McDonalds Happy Meals. I had my Y6 DS with me, but I told him he couldn't join the party as it was rude. We would eat a bit later.

I saw some whispering then the father appeared with another Happy Meal and I noticed my enormous DS sat at the table like Elf with all the other children.

So embarrassing. Such CF'ery from DS.

The first couple of responses are part of the reason we have children with poor resilience in this country. Children need to be allowed opportunities for exploratory play and to develop self risk assessments, this is how they build capacity.

It's not our fault as parents, we've been told there's a paedophile on every street corner waiting to snatch our kids, so we protect them as much as possible. This is reasonable. However, the unintended consequence of this is a generation of children with poor coping strategies.

Read The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt.

Not your point OP but I think the more parents who loosen the apron strings the more resilient our kids will be 🤷🏼‍♀️

I was a CF recently asking for cuttings from my neighbours' flowers in his garden - save me a fortune! 🙈

If you’re happy to pitch in when the shoe is on the other foot, don’t worry about it. It takes a village and all that. I’m always running someone’s DC to swimming, grabbing someone else’s from football or pinging a message ask if someone else can run DC home from a party if I’m caught up. We’re all busy, kids and parents are all nice. It’s not a big deal.

Round here they all walk to and from school alone in year 6 which unusually involves a bit of time in the park near the school so I don't think that's bad, unless the park is miles away and he needed a lift or something.

i agree but at that age there still needs to be a plan.

This really isn’t that big a deal.

The other mum didn’t bat an eyelid

That’s what all CFs believe. Other mum probably came on here and started a thread about you.

Never confess anything on Mumsnet 😂

Asking my neighbour for her WiFi password so I could use it and not pay for my own! I was early 20s and totally lacking in self awareness. Still makes me cringe the things I did and said back then. Now 41 I'm a completely different person.

You were wfh though. That's the bit I dont get. Surely you could have popped out and caught up after?

How far is school?

It wouldn't have bothered me, but that is more neglectful than CF to be honest op. Would your son not have been worrying when you didn't appear? Hardly sounds like you lost track of time, but 'knew' someone else would sort it.

I'm sure the mum was perfectly nice on the surface, but raising her eyebrows internally.

Irresponsible parenting? He’s Y6! This is when they’re meant to start organising themselves and being self reliant. Good on him. He’ll learn to be the sort of pleasant kid who people like having over or tagging along. Don’t sweat it, OP, and maybe have his mates over on a spontaneous basis in return.