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Original poster

Weird first date ?

110 replies

Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 06:08

So I went on a first date with this man that I’ve been talking to non stop for two weeks. He’s been literally calling me everyday. We had a few words a couple years ago but I ended up not following through with him.

anyways we get on the date, and it was awkward? He was staring at me the whole time but no complements, who was staring in space a lot. He even wore sunglasses, I asked him to take them off which he did but put them back on right after….?

Its just very disappointing because we have such good chemistry over FaceTime and phone calls, just for him to show up and he awkward and distant ? Was he just not attracted or into me ?

OP posts:
Flashout · 11/07/2025 08:28

MaryBerrysFannyHammock · 11/07/2025 08:14

Hungover
On coke
Has a roving eye
Is a weirdo

Many reasons op. Please text him and ask and tell us what he says 😂

I’m liking the Bono option but given that he’s married, I think it probably wasn’t Bono.

Roy Orbison?

randomchap · 11/07/2025 08:28

If there was a normal sensible reason for them then he could have explained.

Sorry, I left my prescription glasses at home and need these to see.

I've got a bad head and these are helping, and I didn't want to cancel on you

Etc

JMSA · 11/07/2025 08:27

It sounds like his real personality can’t live up to his online persona!

GreyCarpet · 11/07/2025 08:25

Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 08:07

The thing is he wasn’t saying anything just staring at me ?

Show quote history

I once went on a date with someone from my friendship group. We got on really well in a group. Often sought each other out and chatted away from the group, even met up for coffee once as friends when he was passing by near me and it was all good.

We went on a date and it was a disaster! We just had nothing to say to each other. I suppose we just didn't 'vibe' well without the wider group back up. Neither of us questioned it, we just carried on as we were in the friendship group and the date was never mentioned again! 😄

It happens.

FrijolesFrijoles · 11/07/2025 08:20

ObtuseMoose · 11/07/2025 07:41

Was it Bono?

😎😀

Lins77 · 11/07/2025 08:20

He could have had a valid reason for wearing sunglasses, but I'd expect him to tell you in that case, especially as you asked him to take them off.

(I wear prescription sunglasses for driving and sometimes forget to take my normal ones and I can't see a damn thing without them.)

It doesn't sound like it went well anyway, especially if he hasn't texted you since - time to move on.

Thingyfanding · 11/07/2025 08:17

He might have hay fever, might have smoked a joint, might be autistic and find eye contact difficult, might be a secret agent.
I’ve had a situation where I felt chemistry online but in person, it just wasn’t there and we didn’t speak again afterwards. Nice guy but no spark - it happens.

JMSA · 11/07/2025 08:15

TwistedWonder · 11/07/2025 08:12

Why are you giving this man headspace? It was a shit date, it happens, you just move on.

Show quote history

Also this.

TwistedWonder · 11/07/2025 08:14

GreyCarpet · 11/07/2025 08:03

Tbh, I'd be really put off if I went on a date and they just sat there complimenting me.

I'd expect them to have more to say and wouldn't like the focus being on what I looked like.

Show quote history

Agree. I d been on dates where they makes loads of cringey compliments and I hate it.

Id rather talk like adults and see if our minds are compatible.

MaryBerrysFannyHammock · 11/07/2025 08:14

Hungover
On coke
Has a roving eye
Is a weirdo

Many reasons op. Please text him and ask and tell us what he says 😂

JMSA · 11/07/2025 08:14

TwistedWonder · 11/07/2025 07:42

With respect the ‘chemistry’ you feel through messaging isn’t genuine. Until you meet in person you really have no idea whether there’s anything there and in this case there wasn’t.

Texting for weeks on end creates a false intimacy. Meet up asap and see if there’s a genuine spark.

Edited
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Couldn’t agree more.

TwistedWonder · 11/07/2025 08:12

Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 08:07

The thing is he wasn’t saying anything just staring at me ?

Show quote history

Why are you giving this man headspace? It was a shit date, it happens, you just move on.

Original poster
Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 08:07

GreyCarpet · 11/07/2025 08:03

Tbh, I'd be really put off if I went on a date and they just sat there complimenting me.

I'd expect them to have more to say and wouldn't like the focus being on what I looked like.

Show quote history

The thing is he wasn’t saying anything just staring at me ?

OP posts:
GreyCarpet · 11/07/2025 08:03

IberianBlackout · 11/07/2025 07:37

Probably hungover or on the comedown.

I think it’s odd to expect compliments in person though. Some people feel very awkward about just standing there praising someone even if it’s sincere.

Show quote history

Tbh, I'd be really put off if I went on a date and they just sat there complimenting me.

I'd expect them to have more to say and wouldn't like the focus being on what I looked like.

GreyCarpet · 11/07/2025 08:01

TwistedWonder · 11/07/2025 07:42

With respect the ‘chemistry’ you feel through messaging isn’t genuine. Until you meet in person you really have no idea whether there’s anything there and in this case there wasn’t.

Texting for weeks on end creates a false intimacy. Meet up asap and see if there’s a genuine spark.

Edited
Show quote history

This.

And as for the sunglasses, how on earth is anyone here going to know that?!

Maybe he thought it looked cool? Maybe he doesn't like his eyes? Maybe they're prescription sunglasses and he'd forgotten his normal.ones? Maybe he thinks he's Andrew Eldritch? Maybe he's on drugs? Maybe he's really photosenstivie and light hurts his eyes?

I mean, you could have asked..?

Cavello · 11/07/2025 07:52

In London yesterday with a friend and she was wearing her sunglasses on the tube, because they were prescription and we'd just come from outside. So could be the reason he kept wearing them, although weird that he didn't just say that though. Probably high though in reality. I'd ask him, but dump him if it is drugs, don't waste your time.

GRex · 11/07/2025 07:44

Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 06:16

Why was he wearing sun glasses?

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I don't know. Commonly what people do if they want to know something like that is ask a question such as: "Why are you still wearing sunglasses in the evening?" And then see what the reply is.

TwistedWonder · 11/07/2025 07:42

Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 07:02

Yes it was really good before the date lots of chemistry! I’m not sure what happened the vibe wasn’t there at all ….plus it only lasted a hour, the date was about 4 hours ago and he hasn’t texted me. So I’m just going to move on

Show quote history

With respect the ‘chemistry’ you feel through messaging isn’t genuine. Until you meet in person you really have no idea whether there’s anything there and in this case there wasn’t.

Texting for weeks on end creates a false intimacy. Meet up asap and see if there’s a genuine spark.

ObtuseMoose · 11/07/2025 07:41

Was it Bono?

Dangermoo · 11/07/2025 07:39

Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 06:22

No we were in side a smoothie place when he had them on

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🤢

IberianBlackout · 11/07/2025 07:37

Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 06:16

Why was he wearing sun glasses?

Show quote history

Probably hungover or on the comedown.

I think it’s odd to expect compliments in person though. Some people feel very awkward about just standing there praising someone even if it’s sincere.

Original poster
Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 07:02

Bobbie12345678 · 11/07/2025 06:22

If you have been getting on really well before the date then maybe ask him about it before cutting and running.
My first thought reading it was did he have a migraine?
If you don’t get a good answer or he does it a second time, then ditch him.

Yes it was really good before the date lots of chemistry! I’m not sure what happened the vibe wasn’t there at all ….plus it only lasted a hour, the date was about 4 hours ago and he hasn’t texted me. So I’m just going to move on

OP posts:
Guavafish1 · 11/07/2025 06:47

Trust your gut… I won’t see him again ever

TheJinxMinx · 11/07/2025 06:43

Maybe he thinks the sunglasses are "cool" so chose to wear them. Id find that weird and as bad as the dating market is it would probably put me off wearing them indoors granted it is still bright at 7pm now a days but no need to cover his eyes. Quite rude really as u couldn't make eye contact probably which can be a big part of flirting the little glances etc. Worse case scenario is he has a gf and didn't want to get "spotted"

Original poster
Clarkeroyce · 11/07/2025 06:33

Thingyfanding · 11/07/2025 06:26

@Clarkeroyce During the day I take it? How old are you guys?

this was at 7pm

OP posts:
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